DC, do you like soup? I love soup. I just made some delicous chicken soups. Would you Like some? --InsaneLane
yes soup is good but i don't eat meat... so no chicken soups for me

Phew, I am glad I got rid of that yellow sword..... Sorry about earlier, I'll give you money and shiny thinks to make it up. Are there other swords to look out for? Let me guess, if I find them, you want them?
i want only the black sword... you can have the rest

What the deal with Pres. Bush.? He sucks!! He has no proof on Saddam Husein. Do you think he ought to be impeached?
i think all the humans should be flung from the planet... that should pretty much solve the problem

Who in their right mind back then looked at a cow, decided to squeeze its utters, and drink the first white thing that came out?ChunkyFlamingoTesticles
humans... they are rarely in their right minds

Do you consider what Donnie sees (evil bunnie) in the movie Donnie Darko to be all reality or some schizo sort of dream? ChunkyFlamingoTesticles
it's reality... well his reality... well his fragment of reality... yes

elves are huge kinda mini giants arent they, what has santa done to the elves to make them so small they should be like waaaay taller than me...err.. i fink..what has santa done to his elves to make them sooo tiny?
<points and laughs at you for believing in santa> elves live in the mists you dumbass... they don't have time to make toys for brats...

i bought 8 cans of pop at the dollar store.. does the cashier girl think i'm weird? - Miss Roger's Sweater
she was thinking more about how she wants to get off work and chug some of those... she's addicted... can't you smell it on her breath?

why does my brother like watching 'maury povich' ?when it's obviously time for the news..- Miss Roger's Sweater
i say you break the tv and go play outside

it was very wrong to eat one of my brother's chocolate chip pancakes, right? even though he offered it to me. that's a sure sign that it's bad, right? - Miss Roger's Sweater
i say you just try it... maybe all he did was lick it...

Have you ever had dolls laugh at you? Point and laugh and bleed from there eyes? They come alive at night you know...and stand on the corner of your bed...and laugh...laugh.....I can't take it anymore >< - Kitty
yes... they're all little bitches and let me tell you... they don't laugh so much once you've removed their heads and flung them at your neighbors

Sometimes I start singing a random lines from random songs. What is my mom thinking when I do this? McDiablo
she is wondering if you are aware you are doing this, pretending to do this, or truly insane...

My cat just puked, but now she is fine. Did her stomach have a moment of rebellion? McDiablo
yes... now go clean it up

How do you know when you've eaten too many doughnuts? McDiablo
when you start puking them up

I went to this guys place, he was a big red dude that had goat horns and goat legs. First he killed somebody I did not know, then he called his right hand man a 'worm'. Now he went up to me and started to beat the crap out of me, showed me his latest video of the world been destroyed, he called it 'The Apocalypse', and then kicked me out! Nice Guy! Do you know him? I didn't quite catch his name. And why did I end up at his place in the first place?
that's what you get for watching fox tv... that shit just isn't good for you

I'm curious if it's so hard to do things right... I have this paper to write till Friday, but I'm new to this - the subject and working and stuff... I just have to write about something I don't know, scraping things from books that go with software I don't have and have never seen. And, as if that's not enough, the help that I was supposed to get today vanished because someone forgot to make a phone call yesterday. This guy who was supposed to help me is some IT boss at the City Hall. He doesn't owe me anything (and I don't think he likes me too much), but he owes our company, represented by the guy who was supposed to call him yesterday and tell him I'm going to ask him stuff. I went to talk to the "IT boss" today and he sent me away, telling me that he'll call the other guy and then... bah! And I'm stuck! Give me a good excuse for my colleague to forget about the phone call. (And don't be mean to me cause I wrote this much, I'm pissed and feel like ranting.) - Omuletzu
mean to you? i'm always wonderful... and what is this paper about? it should be easy to come up with something...

Please add to the "people suck" list (if it's not there already): 1. People wo say 10 minutes and you end up waiting for 2 hours. 2. People who promise simple things, like making a phone call and don't do it cause they were busy. How much time do you need for a phone call anyway? 3. Cheap persons being in charge of the firm's finances (the company car is always out of fuel, working on old, worn out computers, if a computer breaks you must wait for a month or more till it gets repaired, etc, etc). My question? Does it get any better than this? - Omuletzu
no additions by anyone but jcp, myself, and sanimal get to add to our lists... that's what my.theinsanedomain will be for... for people like you to post up your ideas of things and people that suck.. and no it doesn't get any better then this

Have you ever met someone who speaks like he knows everything? If you ask him something he always has an answer and he tells it like it's the absolute truth, like there's no doubt in the world... Should I trust him? Is he God? - Omuletzun
those are the people you want to run away from... they think they know everything so they refuse to learn anything new... and how can you know everything if you've stopped learning? there is always something new to learn so stay away from that dead minded person... and no he's not

Do you ever have to do stuff for your job but you don't have the proper tools and documentation? - Omuletzu
yes... and it sucks... i say 'something must be done' and they all look at me blankly... suddenly i wake up at my desk and my coffee is cold... i've had quite enough...

O mighty DC, yesterday night I was chillin, playing hacky sack at 3 in the morning. A man walked up and asked for change so gave it to him. Another man walked up and gave me 2 dollars and said have a better tomorrow, then another man walked up asked for a ciggarette, so i gave it to him, and the 2 dollars. What does this all mean? - JellyFishToast
it means good things are on their way

Have you ever had a prosthetic? -JellyFishToast
no i haven't actually

Do you think the end of the world might come today? -JellyFishToast
it could come on any day... <glances around in sky for meteorites and comets>... i know they are just waiting until i'm not paying attention....

What do you think of the name JellyFishToast o great sock monkey?
it's great and i pissed myself upon hearing it... and so says my brother... 'pissing your pants is like friendship... everyone can see it, but only you can feel it's warmth...'

i'm so happy, my friend finally gave me the eminem cd i lent him. yaaaaay!! aren't happy? irish psycho
you are making me puke again...

Would you think that being a cashier you wouldn't hurt your self? I thought that for about 1 day!~JeEpY!!
everything results in injury...

HOw do you stop yourself from cutting your fingers on bages of sugar that old people keep bring up to buy???~JeEpY!
there is no end... you must wear gloves to avoid this... or buy up all the sugar before they do

i'm a freak and i think everyone else just f%c&ing wierd they have no soul no carisma why am i just in a dream
we're all in a dream... well all of us here at this site anyways...

Yeah, so now I'm supposed to be waiting for a phone call from the guy who forgets to... no, he was busy! Couldn't call from work and he got home too late to call (11 PM). But he said he'll only call me if he has to leave tomorrow... What if he doesn't call anyway? Would that be a terrible psychological shock for me? Will I survive? - Omuletzu
yes you will survive and it will remind you of days gone by

you think you're so bloody insane, do ya? well if you were going to initiate me into the ranks of the insane - fear factor style - what so called insanity of yours would i be up against?
the fact that you used fear factor like that means you lose... you are not insane... just deal with it...

i havent asked a question for a while, you miss me? -Lithanial
what do i get if i say yes?

which is better oral sex or a handjob? - Lithanial
hmmm... i guess that all depends on if i'm recieving or giving...

Why does my artwork suck so much? should i try and pass it off as 'modern' art because its crap or just carry on relentlessly? - Lithanial
carry on... that's the only way to learn... try new things... and stop doing those self portraits... we're all sick of seeing your naked ass

do you think mcdiablo and ms. rogers sweater will stalk me if i told them that i worked at a 7-11 for 2 years, and got all the free slurpies that i wanted?
yes i think they would... in fact... i think they're outside your window right now....

fucking e-tards (ravers), why did they lick my monkey?- monkie boy
they did?! how horrible!

Do you have a water buffalo? FartMonkey
there was one on the wall once but he faded away...

Could I be sued for putting dog crap on a stick and waving it at someone? FartMonkey
well if you're in a certain country then yes... you can be sued for anything

When you delete stupid questions, where do they go? FartMonkey
they go to the land of lost emails, deleted spam and shoes

Who thought of braces (the kind for teeth)? When? What were the first ones made of? Who were they on? Did the installation involve large amounts of heroin? FartMonkey
well it began with someone who wanted to be a robot wired it all up to their mouth and after awhile realized it had straighted their teeth... so they sold the idea, made millions and turned themselves into a robot and blasted off into space to live in peace...

The scissors in front of me are secretly planning on attacking me and/or my hair at any moment, right? McDiablo
well the one half is... the other half wants to spend some time embedded in your throat... either way, i'd bury them in the backyard

My brother has played hockey for about five or six days in a row. He doesn't have to play a game for three days. What should he do with himself? McDiablo
he should cry... cry and cry and cry... then play more hockey

What will happen after I complete my two essays, a screenplay, my books and finish re-writing my short story? Will I have any brain power left at all? McDiablo
yes you will but not for about a week...

Why do I feel as though somone is watching me? I turn to look out the window, and no one is ever there...I even feel like somone is following me when I am walking to the bus stop in the morning. Am I being stalked by the physco squirrels?
yes you are... didn't you get the memo they sent you about the stalking schedule?

Are those strange blobs and squiggly lines on pictures really ghosts... or did Kodak screw up? ~NSuxbum
a bit of both... but mostly the ghosts thing

Our school really thinks we should have bomb drills... are they seriously going to make us climb under our desks... and lock everything? Do they seriously think this will stop it? NSuxbum
no they are just trying to make it look like they are doing something... plus its easier to teach you that then stuff like reading and thinking for yourself

are you emo?
well i had to look up exactly what that term meant... and according to this site, no i'm not

is today a good day? irish psycho
i suppose.. it wasn't bad

why the hell does your site keep having problems? it's so fucking annoying! i think i'm going to go puke now... irish psycho
cuz the stupid place that has our servers sucks and we are switching from them due to those very problems...

Doesn't Ana want to be famous anymore?
she IS famous

go leafs!!!!! aren't you happy they beat the stupid bastard sabres? :) irish psycho
yes... of course i am

Have you ever actually sat out in your car wearing sunglasses and pointed a hairdryer at passing cars to see if they slow down, as is suggested in that stupid chain email that I keep getting? FartMonkey
no i haven't... but then again i don't have a car... and i don't have a hairdryer either

How come if "white is the mother of all colors" and all colors are IN white, if I take all paint colors and mix them together, I get a sick looking brown? FartMonkey
i think that its more like white is the absorbion of all colors of light... what? mother of all colors? i've never heard that before... and that's just the way colors work when you're painting

If I go out on my street corner and run in circles screaming hysterically, how many laps will I be able to complete before I am shot at by passing motorists/sedated by the authorities? FartMonkey
2 hours... unless you throw out religious pamphlets... then they'll let you stay out there for days

How can they do that? How could they? It's just the same old crap! They just pasted on a different title! 17 times this has happened to me! And for what? Just for that stinking donkey? And why should I put up with it one instant longer? I very well may sue.. FartMonkey
i say do it.. that should teach those bastards that they can't mess with you or your cheese

Which is the most widely abused animal? FartMonkey

why is it that everytime i yell "You're a LIAR!" to somebody, i automatically end up adding "...and a THIEF!" regardless of whether they actually stole something or not? - SiNiSTaR
it just fits... how can it be said otherwise?

why do stray cats always look so gnarly compared to my fat pampered cats? - SiNiSTaR
stray cats don't have regular food and someone to pet their fur all nicely...

i have a stalker in college. o help me, please... what do i do to deter him? any special witch's brew or sumthing? - SiNiSTaR
a variety of things may work... kicking their ass... slapping them with a restraining order... telling their mom on them... sending them hate mail and spitting on their pizza

Would you stand up right now and do the Pac-Man dance? If you don't know how that goes, could you do the macerena? Really, stand up right now and dance for me. Clap your hands if you believe, children! FartMonkey
do you really think i know how to do dances such as those? i'm a sock monkey porn star, not a dancer damnit... have i told you people that JCP is looking into getting 'sock monkey porn star' tshirts to sell to you people?

What do you think of the Human Shields in Iraq?
i don't know what i think of that... i live in a reality where planes in the sky don't mean bombs... and i don't have to fear for my life besides driving my truck... it must be a pretty bleak reality for someone to do that sort of thing... i for one am thankful i do not have to live in that reality and feel sad that others are forced to, or allow themselves to

So it's Monday already. If you start the week by answering the insane questions, will you answer them every day till Sunday? - Omuletzu
well i could promise to, but i'd be lying... since i will be moving this week to a new apartment and my computer will be offline for a bit...

How can I escape? - Omuletzu
read a good book... or go camping

Could coffee be good for me? Can it make me feel less sleepy? - Omuletzu
yes it could... it is better then smoking... and yes it can...

For some reason I really find other people's lives nteresting. Like, I like being nosy and readinig JCP's diary thingy etc. My question is...all people who type "lyke dis wiv u r gay n sux0r" should be murdered. Agree or disagree? Reasons?
i strongly agree they should be sterlized.... unless you volunteer to teach them all how to spell properly... and i forgot about JCPs little 'thing'... uh... i didn't say that... let's pretend this ever happened... she'll beat me again... and it wasn't fun last time

Have you ever completely followed anyone's instructions to the last detail? FartMonkey
yes but it still hurt and i couldn't sit for a week

Yeah, I thought I'd ask something else... cause you didn't answer yet and the probability of you answering these questions is increasing rapidly. Only... I have no idea what to ask. So I'm thinking, don't rush me! I feel sick, a bit dizzy and cold and warm at the same time. That sould help me come up with a question... Damn! It doesn't help. Ok, yeah. A question about photosynthesis. Or maybe not. Why the @^#)@(&# is photosynthesis so interesting that ppl would ask so many questions about it and you would have to say you're not answering any more question about it??? I don't get it? And what could someone rant about the sterilized needles before the lethal injection and... Do ppl seek your acceptance? Do they desperately need the good question award to be able to live their miserable lives? By the way, the back of my head hurts now. Gimme a few names of actors who don't suck horribly (you'll probably post a link to some page on this site - don't! Those are probably the ones you like. What abou the ones you don't mind seeing?). Ok, I'll end my pathetic question stream now. - Omuletzu
i'm not sure what the deal was with people constantly asking about photosynthesis... but i guess it shows that there are a fair amount of you who are actually smart enough to be interested in science and be insane enough to come here... and the good question award brings light to their lives... you have to admit you probably got a bit giddy seeing one up there by this question... you can stop giggling now... and actors who don't suck horribly (movies that i've seen them in so far that is) and i'm going to go with both male and females called 'actors'... robin williams, henry rollins, jennifer connelly, and whoever played the mom in requiem for a dream

Hey, my teachers always ask me what I'm going to do with myself when i get out of college and I always reply Skateboard. They say I won't go anywhere with that kind of job and i reply " Yeah well, i will be making more money than your poor ass teacher job" and they don't belive me. I've been skating for 7 years now and i think i can get sponsored. Do you think i should keep going for a sponsor or should i try moving out of my parents house and try to quit mooching off of them and my friends and do something with my life ?-NNY
if skateboarding is what you want to do and you're actually GOOD at it, then give it a shot... you may want to get a job at a skate shop or something and you can do both at once... have the shop sponsor you... if you really are good then you'll make it... if not then have a back up plan

This is day five of no question answerings. This may be my last entry. What's the deal? FartMonkey
damnit so I forgot to update the damned date on the front page... do you just look at that and believe it? don't you check to make sure i'm not some dumbass who forgot to update that page? you don't even TRY!

shit! it's the 25th! are you getting lazy on us here?!? i'm getting desperate!!! Please PLEASE answer the questions!!! irish psycho
see above answer

well...DC I'm at the library...and i dun know what book to get...what book should I get!?i tried "steal this book" but they wouldn't let me...how i want that book...it's about anarchy..and how to cause it..gosh i hate this country..halp!~SG* ^_^
get something from the travel section and learn about some other countries...

what's the best, fastest, easiest way to kill myself?
fling yourself from a really high building...

i have iraqi relatives, are they TOTALLY fucked? - Lithanial
i for one would not know the answer to that but that would suck if they are

Has anyone ever been killed by a small child going up to them, pointing their index finger at them and shouting "bang bang you're dead, fifty bullets in your head"? - Mzebonga
yes... that is what happens when guns are legal to have in your home in some places on the planet cuz that kid actually HAS a gun... for the rest of the world... only in cases where children are psyhics and their mental powers really do end up killing the 'victim' of this innocent game... it's tragic really

is it possible to fart faster than windspeed? and if so how fast can you fart? - Lithanial
well what exactly is windspeed to you? winds go at different speeds... a gentle wind... yes i'm sure someone could fart faster then it... and i don't know that sort of nonsense about myself

dear dc, why do stupid people pretend they know something when they know nothing, and stand there saying (in a deep authorative tone:) "Uh huh, yeeeeeeeesss" just because the boss came along, when 5 mins earlier they couldn't even tie up their own shoelaces? signed "need to know"
dear need to know, they are too stupid to admit they are stupid and then to actually do something about it, signed DC

and one other question, why do those same people who couldn't even finish their homework assignment because they were so stupid they were trying to sum a formula in excel and didn't even know they had a circular reference, then go "that was easy" when they learned about pivot tables in class today, when you know they'll be asking you to show them what to do next week?
they're stupid...

who would win this fight? a ferocious silverback gorilla or a mighty lion? thankyou o great one!
i don't see why they'd be fighting... but i'd go for the lion because i like them more... i may be a sock monkey, but apes are freaky

hey dc...don't u get sick of living in canada? i mean it snows like hell there...why don't u move to some place warmer where u don't have to wear sweaters and jackets and gloves and boots all the time? and shovel the snow...live on coffee...(even though i love it)...-ice*
it's only cold about 4 to 5 months a year... and having four seasons is actually something i enjoy... i like my sweaters and jackets and gloves.. and i don't have to wear them in the spring or the summer... coffee is good no matter where you live

dc, do u have your pants especially tailored (with a hole in the back) so that your sock monkey tail isn't squashed in your ass? do u even wear pants at all? - zxq
i show off my bare ass and tail to the world!

You say DC stands for Demon Child, or is it a cover up for Dumb C***?

Maybe I should breed?

I won the lottery! do you want some of the money? - BD

I have recently decided to follow my life long dream and embark on a career in the lucrative industry of video pornography. My problem is that i cant think of a catchy porn star name to put on my resume. Is 'Sock Monkey' a registered trade mark? If not can I use it?
i wouldn't use that... instead i think you should use Cokk Monkee

Apparently its impossible to keep your eyes open when you sneeze... but I heard that if you force your eyelids open while sneezing the pressure in the sinuses behind your eyes at the moment of the sneeze is so great that it forces the eyeballs out of their sockets leaving them to dangle around your face, still connected to the optic nerve. Is this true? If so, would you then be able turn the eyeballs around and look yourself in the face? - Gaylord Fauker
it could be true... i say try it out and tell us what happened

On your 'Good Question Award' page there's a question about the Smurfs. I just thought you should know that that line was ripped straight from Donnie Darko. It doesn't deserve a good question award, its not a good question, its just a bite on someone else's good work. People who can't make a creative contribution shouldn't be praised and awarded, they should be exposed for the frauds they are. In my day to day life I come across so many of these f*#king phonies. What is it with these people? Why are they compelled to act in this way? What are they trying to prove? Do they honestly expect anyone to take them seriously? Why are there so many of them around? When someone is obviously spinning me a load of BS I'm truly offended - there's something about fakeness and superficiality that just makes me angry - i think its just an insult to a persons intelligence when you bullshit them and expect them to believe it. But aside from the anger, I'm more perplexed really - I don't understand these people, what drives them to be like this? Wouldn't they just be happier being themselves?? - GF
that question isn't line for line from Donnie Darko... it is similar in that both speak of smurfs, but it is quite different then the movie dialogue...

Why does my cat make this weird noise just before she is going to do something bad, ie: Jump up on something she is not allowed to jump up on. McDiablo
to make sure you notice her doing something bad... cats like to do that just to shove it in your face that they don't care about your rules

Why does my dad not wear his glasses when he knows that his vision is going? McDiablo
his mind is going too

Is it really a Timbit reality? McDiablo
in most cases yes... if you don't specifically ask for the stuff you like, you're stuck with a horrible mix

How much money do you think I spend on Slurpees in a year? McDiablo
about $150

Do you think it will be the canadians or mexicans taking over the earth first? ~JeN
the CATS will...

Why can't I live a Springer life? ~JeN
why the hell would you want to?

ok now, if i must say this , i will, but it doesnt seem at all required of me. i should hope that it wouldnt be but all of you seem to have to know what i am about to say. if , and i mean if, one day there was a kid, and this kid was about 5, and he liked to play with his little sister, and she was only 3, they had a small sandbox they liked to play in together..and on wednesdays, they would play house in it, you know that little kid game...balh im the dad and i work and your the mom blah balh..., anyways, back to the kid......taking all that into consideration, when would this kid turn 12?
in about 7 years unless he chokes on a sand shovel and mom's go to work too.. not just dads

I bring you my question today in poetry form: Why do you call it the insane domain? Its not insane its just plain lame the sight of DC brings me pain His jokes are boring, tired and tame So why do you call it the insane domain When its not insane and just so lame? - Dr Suese
if you don't like it... why are you here?

I met a duck at a bowling alley It had really big feet anyway it started talking to me and now im being stalked what should I do?
throw bread properly until it leaves you alone

Are you a lover of Tim Horton's doughnuts? McDiablo
sometimes yes... other times i'm just an admirer

How often have you set your fire alarm off? McDiablo
twice in the last 3 months

Got any phobias? McDiablo
deep dark water that i can't see the bottom of... bugs in my bed... clowns

did you steal my stapler?
no... but maybe i will

are you just ducky today?
uhhh no

i want sex, no relationship, just hot wild sex, is anything wrong with me?
nope... not as long as you find someone who shares that view and make SURE you use something so you don't breed...

DC, *sighs* you told me and my lesbian friend to call you, well we tried, your phone was cut off, did you forget to pay the bill?? Do i have to move back in with you, so you can just be a bum and have me pay all your bills? not that I mind, the sex is great!! -monkeeskittles
oh... uh... email me next time

did you miss me DC? I missed you. I missed asking you stupid questions when my computer broke. *crys* Such a happy reunion! Now, how many licks does it take to get to the center of a Jalepeno?--Syko Morgana
uh... sure... and two

Well, I'm confused. Have you got any ideas? FartMonkey
several but i'm not sharing

How come every time I turn on this stupid computer I have to reset the preferences? FartMonkey
it SUCKS... or someone is messing with them when you're not looking

Why must people type LiKe tHiS?- colbstar
they are stupid

is a lamp shade an appropriate hat?- colbstar

Why do some people who are supposedly good friends share awkward silences once they run out of pathetic anecdotes which are the constituent parts of what amounts to nothing more than a straightforward exchange of crap information that serves to motivate their listless lives as opposed to enjoying a passionate, engaging, producitve conversation?
it's just part of life and it's better then digging holes to nowhere... well almost

hey is it possible for you to go to jail if your over 18 and you talk to some one online who you have never met and you just talk
if you didn't harrass them or threaten them or steal their credit card info then i don't see why you'd get arrested...

when i fill out forms, under "race" i always put 'human'. what can i put instead because i fucking hate admitting i'm human. - SiNiSTaR
sorry.. if you are then you have to answer that way... thats why they put it on forms

ok, I have a few questions. #1-If a turtle doesnt have a shell is he naked or homeless? Should I build him a house or buy him clothes? #2-ICQ hates me, ever since my cat slept on the moniter it has not let me on, did my cat had something to do with this? #3 If i was to put toilet paper on my arms and open an umbrella and jump off the house would i fly?-monkeeskittles
1. both, and build him a new one 2. no 3. briefly... the art of flying is missing the ground

what is a fulfilling, appropriate, yet tasteful way of celebrating the occasion of catching out the fat arsed know-all I mentioned to you in my question to you last week, opening her big trap and telling someone, "Oh that's easy"! so I got her and told the person she was sprouting to in front of the boss, "ask Allison, she'll show you" (false name used because her's is so stupid) only to see her flapping (and she flaps!) around trying to put her money where her mouth is? What sort of wine would you suggest to go with what kind of savouries? Yours delightedly, Staleywise.
i say pizza is a good way to celebrate anything... and send me some too cuz i've been sick and have none at all

is lying hound an adjective or a verb? yours in eager anticipation kind regards, "Need to know"
uh.... i wasn't actually taught that in school and i'm ashamed to admit it... so i'll distract you with some fancy footwork until you grow weary and leave

Why am I obsessed with plucking things with tweezers?--Syko Morgana
no idea... but stop it... it's not natural to have no eyebrows

will you dance with me and my pet duck rufus?--Syko Morgana
no... i told you that after he bit me on the butt that i'd never dance with you again

is it humane and funny to carry out amateur experiments on animals? - Lithanial
not it's not so stop it damnit... i told you that won't fit up my ass

I've been crying every night since i touched gran, why did she get so angry?
she told you not to and you did anyways... how rude

hi DC can I come up to your place tonight?--Syko Morgana
no... i have a cold and am not up for visitors

DC....its me monkeeskittles! YAY! ok anyway, i was looking back at some questions and i saw where you were selling mzebonga, this was way back on like page 17 i think, anyway(heres where i ask my question and you breathe a sigh of relief) Can i be sold too? Ill make someone very happy. I mean Im smart, big boobs, insane, what else could people want??
well since you're smart, i would think that covers it all... oh wait... do you have a good sense of humor? well you are here so you must... if you don't shop for shoes every day, and don't enjoy shopping at all then sure we'll sell you

on a scale of one to ten, how pathetic am I today? yours pathetically, Ms Pathetic
about an 8

Since your a vegeterian, do you ever eat those fake soy protein meats like the Meatless Riblets(i just love that world, riblets) or the boca burgers, do you like those?--Syko Morgana
i haven't had meatless riblets... but the burgers are good... there are veggie dogs that taste good too

how do they get those fake soy meats to feel so spongy and meat like?
i don't know... but it tastes good and i'm glad it's available for those who don't eat meat

do you like BBQ sauce?--Syko Morgana
some of it without meat... yes

Did you hear that Mr. Noodle from Sesame street died??Isnt that sad? Shouldnt we all offer a moment of silence for Mr.Noodle?..*moment of silence.*;..................................................Okay, lets fuck.--Syko Morgana
mr noodle? never heard of him... and ok

would you hate me if I joined the military?--Syko Morgana
i don't hate people just because they make different choices then i do... i may not agree but that's that

DC, how come whenever I'm high I always make out faces of like the pink panter and captain crunch in my food?--Syko Morgana
i was about to ask if the military will mind that you get high, but then i figured it was probably something they encourage so they can order you about better

What is JCP going to do with that cup now that all of the crap is dumped out?Surely nobody would drink out of it after it sat with rotted contents for months..eww..--Syko Morgana
damnit... that's why she laughed as i was drinking... that bitch!

Hey now...what's with the pop up ads all of a sudden? FartMonkey
what popup ads? not here ... you must have the new version of kazaa or something shitty

I see. So everybody's sick now. Even the questionnaire is about sickness. Is VER sick too and if not, when will he be? - Omuletzu
he doesn't seem to be infected quite yet... we're working on it

What would you do if someone kidnapped you and made you watch Britney Spears videos all the time? Ok, I know it's a Britney Spears question, but... it's also a you question. - Omuletzu
i'd eat open my wrists and die

Why can human senses be tricked so easily? - Omuletzu (Did you get this, or my net died before??)
it's just one of those things that happens... once humans get their upgrade then it will be better

I suppose that, even with the rules written just near the question field, you get a moderate amout of gibberish, repating questions, etc. What do you do with those? Aren't some of those fun to read? - Omuletzu
i just delete them... if they are fun to read then i leave them... sometimes i just have so many questions that i delete those that i'd give one word answers to

You know, you can find some conversation bots on the internet. You could take one of those, feed every question and answer ever written into his little file-based brain and then let it answer the insane questions for you (or try at least). What do you say? (No, JCP would not fire you and replace you with a robot, don't worry!) - Omuletzu
damnit she would... we will never speak of this again

Is shopping with someone better than shopping alone? - Omuletzu
shopping sucks period... things should just be sent to my door that i'd like

iS TyPiNg LiKe tHiS a cRiMe aNd iF sO, uNdEr WhaT sEcTiOn aNd wHaT iS tHe FiNe aNd oR MaNdaToRy SeNTeNcE? - SiNiSTaR
yes it is and it's under the DC anti-bad typing act section 1933 and you have now been fined $50000

syko morgana is a lovely nickname. don't u agree? - SiNiSTaR
jcp is looking into getting tshirts made and one of the printers came to the site and said how they liked everyone's creative nicknames... so yes and most of them are pretty good

my sister's band is called 'beautiful disaster' and she's the bassist. whaddaya think of the name? they won some battle of the bands thingy recently. i am so proud. - SiNiSTaR
that name sounds like a 311 song...i could be wrong... but i don't think i am

why cant i have a donkey?--Syko Morgana
they HATE you

I dont believe in god or the devil, is something wrong with me for that? My moms said im going to hell cause i dont believe but how can i go somewhere that i dont believe in?
exactly... you are entitled to believe whatever you want... people may not agree with you, but if they can't accept that then it's too bad for them... i don't believe in that hypocritcal nonsense either... people preaching about a god of love... then they go out and kill in that name? that doesn't make sense at all...

owwwwww DC it bit me! why did it bite me? can you come and smush it? monkeeskittles
you said i could!

why didn't you display my question about touching my gran, man?!!! I need to know!! Is there something you find abhorrent about grannytouching?! You making out like im some kind of freak!!?Look, just give me a straight answer, you know, i don't want to fuck with your shit or anything, but you could be a lot more real with these people who ask you questions...come on.
i did damnit! now pay me cuz you were rude to me

how old are you guys?
i'm 25... so is JCP... ver is 30... poptart is 31 (or 32?) the rest are irrelevant

how can i lose weight~i really want to starve myself in order to lose a lot of weight in a little amount of time! pleaz help!! angelbabe
GET THE HELL OFF THIS SITE YOU DUMBASS... you want to look good then eat good and exercise and be healthy you idiot

What are seven alternate uses for a keyboard? FartMonkey
1. hammer 2. back scratcher 3. paddle 4. prop for a play 5. foot rest 6. plate 7. pillow

Rolling backpacks:A good thing? A bad thing? You don't care? FartMonkey
i'd have to say that i don't care... it's just the way it is

Wait now...I guess they're not rolling backpacks...cuz for it to be a backpack it has to be....on your back...so really it's a floorpack? See where I'm going here? FartMonkey
you're going to be going into the closet and locked in there for a bit...

What is the most common misspelling of the word "a" ? FartMonkey

I swear the garden gnomes down the street change their facial expressions every time I look at them. Are they plotting against me? Should I make use of that big metal hammer in the garage? FartMonkey
just talk to them... normally they're very nice... it's gnome-haters like you that give the rest of us a bad name

Can you tell me about one of the instances in which you've shaken your fist at someone/something today? If you haven't, you may shake your fist at this being such a stupid question. FartMonkey
i shook my fist at a sign that said 'Botox is now here', and the ice on my windows

Do you think if I wear one of those mickey mouse hats from disneyland and stand in front of a snake's cage at the zoo, it will strike up against the glass because it thinks I am an enormous rat? FartMonkey
only if you have your tail hanging out

DO'nt yOu aGrEe tHat pEopLe wHO tYpE likE thiS aLL tHe tiMe NeeD tO bE shOt rEpeAteDLy iN THe FacE? FartMonkey
that or send me $50000

When you die, does your cotton stuffing return to the earth from whence it came? FartMonkey
no... it shoots off into space where it can visit the stars and rest of the universe

If I were to send in two of the exact same question stating "Do you ever get deja-vu?", would you delete one (or both) of them, or get the joke, be a sport, and post both of them? FartMonkey (Assuming you will go with the first option, I will not make an attempt.)
i'd put them together as one question but now since i've been asked this already i'll just delete them both and send a current of electricity to any who tried to send it again

Since Americans throw rice at weddings, do Orientals throw hamburgers?
no and not all americans throw rice because it's not a good thing

If you got into a taxi and the driver started driving backward, would the taxi driver end up owing you money?
no... distance travelled is distance travelled... no matter which way you're facing and i'd give them a tip for driving backwards so well

Do fish get cramps after eating?
only if they've eaten a lot

when are you going to post the ques./what if results for march? im pissing my pants with excitement. i hope my answers went through!--Syko Morgana
you people are so demanding... i work so hard and you just want more more more! BRATS! i do this out of the goodness of my sock monkey heart and it's never good enough for you people! <sobs>

Why is it when a substitute teacher cant find you its your fault? (Could it be because we were hiding under the stage with a few friends?) giggle giggle...umm yea sorry... hmmm...~NSuxbum & Doucher
you know where you are... it's not your fault they aren't smart enough to find you... they're just frustrated so they get mad... plus being a teacher is probably one of the toughest jobs on the planet to do RIGHT...

Should the damn freshmen get the money? or should we keep it and give some of it to you?~NSuxbum & Doucher
i say split it between us all...

hmmm...what would be a good fundraiser for money? NSuxbum & Doucher
what are you raising money for? if it's something cool then uh... i don't know... throw yourself in front of buses and get everyone on the bus to donate

I asked a question a few months ago. And it never appeared. Is it because I'm a white powder that has yet to blossom into manhood? Anthrax.Boy
it could be... that or it was a silly question or one i didn't feel like answering... you're not the boss of me!

My cat threw up not once, not twice, but three times. After that, she ate some food. What was the matter with her? McDiablo
too much food? too much carpet fluff? maybe the food isn't good for her? no idea... i'm not a vet

Is it weird that I rarely use my credit card? McDiablo
no it's a good thing... a very good thing... now those scary people can't track your every move... figure out what sorta stuff you like... and everything... unless you have a cell phone... cuz that does the same thing but mostly just points out where you are at all times

What's the worst movie you've seen? McDiablo
any love story kind of movie... they all are the same and they suck...

What the hell was up w/ Frank in Donnie Darko? I don't know if it's because I was really friggin tired when I watched that or what, but I kinda get it (like the eye etc) but not the whole thing. Please explain.
watch it again... and again... then if you don't have the DVD... rent/buy it and watch the extras and more will be explained....

how much would you charge me... or what would you charge me if i came to live with you??? I dont like it here... people suck... I want to be close to true insanity...please me me come... pleassseeee!~NSuxbum
i would charge you $2000 CDN a month

wooohoooo i get to be sold:: does a little dance:: set my price please!! monkeeskittles ps-um i have like 5 pairs of shoes and i will not go shopping for them or anything, cept for food ;)
i think empriss nikon would love to have you... not for pleasure though...

"Look, distraction Ninjas! <steals food>" What would you give me out of 7 for my method? - Fido Dido
a 5... maybe a 6... but only if they're well trained distraction ninjas

Thankies for the dinosaur head!!^_^ lol but you do know there are cameras in the fire alarms right?..right?!BLOCK EM OFF!!!..or just flash em...mehehe~SG*
you've said that already haven't you?

why do people ask so many shitty questions?
some have made it their life's work

Does it annoy you when people refer to "9-11"? Can't they think of a better name for it? Even "That-Time-When-Those-Guys-In-Turbans-Hijacked-Planes-And-Knocked-Down-Them-Two-Buildings"? FartMonkey
they probably say '9-11' because the 'guys in turbans' thing is offensive and isn't accurate

If a monkey on crack joined the FBI would he get arrested?

Would you kindly post this in order to tell Miss Roger's Sweater that I ask so many questions because I have A) a curious nature B) had a troubled childhood C) dyslexia and D) no concept of "too many questions". Wait, that would be making this my personal messaging board, wouldn't it? FartMonkey
yes it would and then i'd have to beat your sorry monkey ass... so bring it on over... and don't bother with the whole 'i'll just wear lots of underwear and pants so it doesn't hurt' thing

When you have liposuction, they suck fat out of your butt and inject it into your lips, then aren't people literally kissing your butt? FartMonkey
yes... and that's what they get for being so stupid

Are you getting tired of people asking so many questions about why people type LiKe tHiS? FartMonkey

Would I make a good canadian sock monkey? FartMonkey
if you're not rude to others and if you don't drive a honda civic then maybe

what do you do when you have a huge zit on your face that starts talking to you, and when you scold it in public people look at you funny even though you have explained to them that your pimple was being a rude sonofabitch, and you just wanted to teach it some manners? - SiNiSTaR
some people think zits are created nice and polite... they're wrong... they need to be dealt with

what do you say to someone, when you ask them why the hell you should go out with them, they start saying shit like, "Why!? Why is the grass green? Why is the sky blue?" - SiNiSTaR
say chlorophyll and water... and then re-ask your question... if they're dumb... why bother going out with them?

Have you been wondering where i've been? if my freaky guitar teacher has abducted me with his cat pictures? - Miss Roger's Sweater
well we had started an investigation, but all we came up with was that you weren't in the fridge

can a keyboard be sexy? cuz my mom got a new one and it has all these fancy buttons and the top and bottom are blue, and i must say, it's a tad sexy, for a keyboard. - Miss Roger's Sweater
do NOT lick it... no matter what it says and how sexy you think it looks...

I have to write my term paper this week for my 'philosophy of religion' class. should i write it on karma or a limited god. help me out here dc. - Miss Roger's Sweater
karma... and be nice about it or it will come back to haunt you

dc, does it piss you off when people ask question of their personal life and the not so insane issues they have? nicki the sticky sockmonki
it all depends... if it's a stupid question then it bothers me

How come it doesn't rain donuts anymore?--Syko Morgana
damn clouds... they're so greedy

A while back you told me that Sanimal has an exstenive collection of naked pictures of B. Aurthur. Does he want to do some trading or selling?--Syko Morgana
i did? probably true... and don't ask me...

Doesnt the name Guy annoy you?--Syko Morgana
only if they say it 'geeeeeeeeeee'

Wouldnt it be funny if I spontanesouly combusted from asking you too many questions?--Syko Morgana
i'd laugh... and point... then point and laugh

Have you ever had sex with an ice cream sandwhich??--Syko Morgana
no... they all say no

am i going to be able to stay awake for my class today? people are doing boring presentations that make me want to hurt someone... can i hurt someone? - Miss Roger's Sweater
nope... and yes!

do you enjoy getting random cheques from the government too? - Miss Roger's Sweater
if i did then yes...

What should I do about my pet human who keeps breaking out of her shell?
i'd say get a bigger place... something with a nice yard...

What does my laptop case look like a gangsta gun carrier?
what does? why does? and if it looks like that then i'd get a different one...

What do you say to people who are obsessed with lord of the rings and force their kids to read it, but then forbid their children to read harry potter? It's all the same stuff, only stolen, with different names, and less severe. What's with those people? FartMonkey
i'd say that reading the lord of the rings is a punishment... as the first part is painful to read and all that damned singing sucks ass... and yes they are both fantasy books... so i don't see why people would have issues

Can I give you some tips to making this domain even more insane. 1) more midgets - my theory is anything can be improved by increasing the midget factor, i.e. midgets riding skateboards, midgets in sock monkey porn, pictures of various midgets just standing around, whatever. When I see this site I say, "yeah, its pretty insane, but it's just not 'midgety' enough", the migeticity just isn't there. 2) One word, Vomit. This site is desperately lacking in the big V, chunder, puke, barf, yack whatever you wanna call it, you need more of it. Instead of this boring old black background how about a spewlicious technicolor vomitscape? Or even better a 'rate my retch' section where people send in pics of their favorite pavement pizza and we rate them! 3) More nudity - well, its not really insane but it couldn't hurt. 4).Drugs and alcohol - nothing says insanity more than a bit of drug induced psychosis. How about giving all the kiddies out there a real taste of insanity. Hang around outside your local pre-school and hand out a few 'party sweets', then film the hilarious results! Pre-schoolers whacked up on goof-balls, now I'd pay to see that! . Then when their done your bound to have some valuable material for the 'Rate my Retch' section as well. Bonus!! 5). Hidden cameras - anything involving a hidden camera is funny, the comedic possibilities are limitless: hidden toilet cam, hidden bathroom cam, hidden midget cam... whatever. Any combination of these of these five essentials is bound to be a winner. Here's an idea: you go Big Brother style and cram a bunch of naked midgets into a house full of hidden cameras. Then you get 'em drunk and lace their drinking water with LSD whilst hidden toilet bowl cams take snapshots of their midget chunderspew for us to rate! Now that’s entertainment! Anyway dude, think about it. - Chunderspew
now that would YOUR version of insanity... and let's face it... there are many sites out there like that already... and who are we to try to out-do those sites? plus... 1 we don't feel that midgets should be used for purely sexual uses... 2... there is enough vomit elsewhere like jackass to satisfy you... 3... JCP won't pose nude and the rest of us would make the site turn into number 2... 4... no.... 5... we're working on a webcam, but other then that, no...

So what do you guys do apart from this site? Are any of you hot? would you go out with me? - Batman (nananananana)
we live, breath, have jobs, and do stuff... some of us are... and no

You say you require large amounts of money for sexual favors - do you except midgets as payment?
midgets are not money

why do you give good question awards to crap questions? example: "I asked a question a few months ago. And it never appeared. Is it because I'm a white powder that has yet to blossom into manhood? Anthrax.Boy" received the only good question award of the 20 or so questions in the last batch. How is this a good question? Isn't it true that the good question award is just a sham? Do you even read the questions? Are you already using that automatic question answering program thing that that guy was talking about? If you are I think its broken.
hmmm... it might be broken... or maybe i'm just trying to keep you freaks on your toes... thinking 'maybe it could be me....' which it won't be... but maybe... maybe?

Why do gay guys talk in that lispy big gay Al way - girls don't speak like that so where do they get it from?
they don't... it's a stupid sterotype... if some do then ask them why... but not ALL do so stop it

why is the good question award an ugly ass vultue head?
why shouldn't it be?

DC are you insane as in mentally unstable or just in the whacky and zany sense?
why should i be grouped into one or the other? it changes hourly

why is it that when i've got heaps of homework to do i suddenly have the urge to waste hours abusing people in chats and asking inane little sock monkeys stupid questions - yet i would never do these things at any other time because their pointless and boring?? - Batman (na na na na na na na na na)
you're one of those people that like to distract themselves from doing any real work yet feel compelled to do something... you should really start collecting money for me... that's productive

hey listen to this if you dont strip naked for me ill throw animal crackers at you and i just might spank you too how do you like that?!?!--Syko Morgana
i'd like that a lot actually...

Well all my friends are back home from the chorus trip to Virginia... They seem to had lots of fun.... Did they miss me at all? :-( ~NSuxbum
only a little bit... the rest of the time they were thinking about not missing you at all...

where is the spot on a girls pussy that makes the cum uncontolably??? stephen
as with most humans, each female is different... so find it yourself on the chick who actually lets you touch her

What do you get when you cross an overweight camel with a turkey named George, then take the result of that cross and cross it with a Hostess twinkie? This isn't one of those dumb jokes.. well it's dumb but it isn't a joke...but I really want to know..FartMonkey
you're right... it is dumb

My sister's social studies teacher has a 'thing' about doing a bibliography perfectly. He even pulls out a magnifying glass to check and see if there are five character-long spaces from the margin when starting a new line. Is it safe to say that he's a little ... mentally unstable? McDiablo
a lot unstable... kinda like me where i think i've had this asked before but have i really? no one knows

Can you tell me who invented internet slang so I can go out and hurt them? McDiablo
it's a whole bunch of stupid people...

Were you too cool to watch the Junos, or did you actually sit down and indulge in some Canadian music? McDiablo
i wasn't too cool for them, i just don't like watching those shows period and if i have to see/hear celine dion even for ONE second i will smash my tv....

What's wrong with driving a Honda Civic? - Omuletzu
there is nothing wrong with driving it if you don't ride up my ass... don't crank BAD music out of it... don't install loud mufflers on it and don't put stupid stickers on it... if you own one and don't do that, then you're the first

are you annoyed by an abundance of politcal questions yet?i am...
i'm annoyed by high pitched noises

which is better? a life filled with dreams or one filled with theinsanedomain?
they're the same thing... this website IS dreams...

i was on the hot n boys website..you know the site with those 3 guys who dress up like black rappers well its funny..but the question is, who do you think is the most attractive?and dont be all .."Im straight, k? ..i dont know that stuff" ..its just showin insercuity about your sexuality.. and it make me bombard you with homoerotic questions..And its possible for a man to know another man got looks, i think david hasselhof is a very handsome man.
i think you have some un-fun issues... first of all, that doesn't sound like any site i've ever seen, and i don't care enough to find the one you're speaking of... second of all david hasselhof couldn't be further from good looking if he tried... i think you have wandered onto the wrong site... move along... nothing more for you here....

GAH... i should be in school about an hour..i have to walk but im praying i dont, its so hard on the feet.I need a ride..so dc pop o on over have some tea and drive me to school on your way home, k?
are you praying here? i told you about that! and i told you i'm not allowed on the property... that whole 'restraining order' thing

what you mean NO experiments? not even trying to find out if kowala bears explode in forest fires? eucalyptis trees do because of all the oil in them and since kowalas only eat eucalyptis leave they surely must explode too? right? surely its worth testing? - Lithanial

have you had sex with a real person dc? If not, why haven't you??
yes i have...

Why do we have to work 5 days a week, dont you think itd be better to work 2-3 days a week, and have 4 days off? I mean theres enough people to do that right? -JellyFishToast
yes there is... i don't know what the damn problem is

Do you think scrub a dub ever died? -JellyFishToast
stubb a dubb never did... so... it goes to show you just never know

What would happen to a sock monkey if he went through a black hole? -JellyFishToast
many many things that are too complex for you to understand

There are crazy men around me talking in wierd fake accents and are downloading wierd sounds from their laptops...should i just sit here pretending nothing is going on? i really am quite scared- colbstar
no sudden moves... if the dominant of the two comes up and sniffs you... just whack him on the side of the head and scream "NO DINGO WILL EVER GET MY BAYYYBEEEEE"...

if a friend calls another friend's dad "cute" by accident..how should you react?- colbstar
first, i'd shove the offending friend into a tub of week-old jello... second, i'd pinch them at least once just to prove my point... thrid, i'd rent a kangaroo to have it kick the shit out of the friend...

yes..Today was Mardi Gras day!at school...and i got beads...but i didn't flash...why oh why did so many guys and girls give me beads?...~SG*
maybe they didn't like them? maybe they had too many? many it means they feel sorry for you? maybe it means that people like giving you stuff?

I have a What If for you...what if I found a question in the Questionnaire format in the What If section? Would your world be turned upside down? Or is it just the opium? FartMonkey
a little of both but who is to say? ever since that pillow ate the tree i've learnt not to question such things as it only leads to more questionable events which is what they want

Well what IS up with these pop up ads? They only come up when this site is up, and I don't have any other pages up or new programs...is it the government? My english teacher? Opium? FartMonkey
you better just be fucking with us... we are anit-ad... if you ARE getting them then go download AdAware and run it...

isnt angelina jolie spicy and deviously hot?--Syko Morgana

Will you scratch my back?--Syko Morgana
no... last time i fell for that, the person was found dead somewhere... i didn't kill them but i had their skin under my nails so i was held for questioning for a long time...

Would you have any idea why JCP wrote in her "horses are evil" page that if I don't agree with the stuff there, I am one or more of the following things, and one of the following things is "under the influence of horses or horses"? Aren't horses and horses the same thing? If there is a difference, could you tell me whether I am under the influence of horses, or horses? Oh wait, I'm not under the influence of anything...except sock monkeys and cheese...FartMonkey
she was seeing if you were paying attention... since she obviously wasn't...

Can you write some more damned shrink stories or insane sock monkey stories? FartMonkey
i probably could... but then would would wear the silly hat?

Are you watching the Stanley Cup playoffs, or do you care less? McDiablo
oh i'm watching... go leafs go...

My mom made a salad in less than two minutes. Should she get a cookie for doing that? McDiablo
sure why not... give her two

What does one do in order to get that garlic bread taste out of their mouth? McDiablo
spit... eat dirt... root beer...

Why won't they stop staring? Why won't they all just leave me alone? FartMonkey
i told you already... turn the tv off and they won't stare anymore...

I think life is just death's waiting room, and the crap we have to deal with every day is just the same old tattered boring magazines that it contains. Plus you pick up diseases from other people in waiting rooms...that just makes things more fun while you wait to die...well I have to make this a question somehow...I'll just ask if you agree. Do you agree? FartMonkey
sometimes yes... though when i'm in waiting rooms i like to bother others, draw in the books, wander the halls and chase small children screaming 'i'm the plague!'... so i guess its all a matter of if you take it sitting down quietly or not....

Aren't you fed up with humans? I sure am. Why should my life be controlled by people I don't even know about? Like money. Why should I have money? Money is of no value to me. They tell us to value it, and we obey like the sheep that we are. Then we get in fights over it. Then we kill eachother over it. Why? It's little piecies of paper. I'm going to start my own little world. There will be no money. If there were money, I would think coins would be worth more than bills...they're prettier..and they make a happy jingling sound. Then so do the little tabs off of soda cans. Also in my world there will be no politics. People deciding who's better than everybody else just because they know more people. They are such idiots. There won't be the media either. Telling me that I have to have straight teeth and being ugly is bad. What do I need with the media? It's just there to make me feel bad. There will be no concept of rich. Who cares who has more little papers with pictures of dead presidents on them? It doesn't make you a better person. It just makes me laugh at them because they think they are better than me because they have a lot of those little papers, or a big paper saying that they have a lot of those little papers. Idiots. Nobody else will tell me what is bad. That's what THEY think is bad. I will decide for myself what I think is bad. Telling me something is bad only means YOU think it is bad, and that only makes me question it. When I rant like this, I figure that I just will stop caring what people think of me. I tell them that. Then I can tell they think I'm crazy. I think I'm crazy. But then I think no, I'm right! But they think I'm weird. Ok, then I'm wierd. I have my own ideas. They all can obey all the crap just because some unknown force tells them to. I'm fed up with humans. Thank you. FartMonkey
that's fine to be fed up with them... but if you treat the rest of us 'weird' ones like you do the idiots then you're part of the problem... so be cool to the cool/weird people ...

"When you have liposuction, they suck fat out of your butt and inject it into your lips, then aren't people literally kissing your butt? FartMonkey" FartMonkey is the one who kept on talking about "SUCK THE FAT" a few weeks back! Should we beat him up?
i'm always up for a bit of violence

whats the most idiotic thign you've done in the last 3 days?--Syko Morgana
i tried swinging from the curtian rod by my tail... i didn't really aim properly and i just bounced off the window

When we die are we going to become God's like of peanut butter or our favorite things like God of the Insane Domain and stuff??--Syko Morgana
well i don't know about you but i plan on touring the universe after i'm dead... there is a lot of cool things to see out there and i just can't do it without breaking the speed of light... when i'm dead i won't have to be bothered with such limitations

One thing kids like is to be tricked. Last week, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said, "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late and so I went home, I decide not to let him know the real truth. Ain't I such a mean person?
ok now this i'm sure i've heard before.. you are ripping off someone but i don't know who...

We tend to scoff at the beliefs of the ancients. But we can't scoff at them personally, to their faces, and this is what annoys me. Is there any way I can do it?
yes go to easter island

Though I do agree that I could use a good sound beating, when WAS I talking about "SUCK THE FAT"? Was I really? Or was it just an opium-induced dream that whoever asked that question had? FartMonkey
all i'm thinking about is the beating you deserve

I'm going to the store... you want anything? FartMonkey
more gingerale

What should I hang all over my cieling in an effort to make my room more insane? FartMonkey

i finished my last class tonight.. should i celebrate even though i still have exams? - Miss Roger's Sweater
celebrate after the exams or else everything will turn to liquid and you'll float away

do i have hockey on the brain too much when i start thinking of exams as the 'playoffs' and i finished my 'regular season' classes tonight? - Miss Roger's Sweater
i'd say that you do have hockey on the brain but that it's ok to...

yesterday i did a presentation in english class and there was this guy who is a really big dork and he pissed us off cuz he was lame and didn't want to participate with the rest of the group and everyone hated him. can i kick him in the nuts? -Miss Roger's Sweater
no... that's not needed... kick the kneecaps

I'm so pissed off right now I could break some necks! But do I have the right to complain? Nooo! I feel I should be out there stealing, ripping people off - that's the way to do it nowadays! If you want the good life you have to steal, not to work like everybody else. Every day I hear about illegal stuff, people stealing billions from public money and at the same time the government says they'll add a new tax on something. Yeah, that's it! They need more public money to steal! Lemme tell you a small story (not about public money). I had this card from this bank. It wasn't a credit card, it was just used to take money that I already had from an ATM. They started sending me my account balance by mail - every letter cost me something. I wrote them not to send me those anymore - they kept on sending them. I went to the bank and told them I want my account closed but that I had lost the card. They todl me I have to pay *** (debt). I did. They kept sending me the mail until I got some more debt. Went and gave them the card (found it) and closed the account AGAIN! Got another one of those papers - I still ow them money. What should I do? Go and shove all those pieces of paper down the throat of that guy who closed my account the last two times? Burn down the bank? Sue them? Talk to the manager? Go and make a monster scandal till they come and take me out with the police? - Omuletzu
there is no way to escape the banks... you are doomed

why are you so against animal experimentation? insulin used to be gathered by butchering pigs for theyre pancreases by the thousands to keep all our diabetics alive before genetics came about. so surely the world wont miss just ONE kowala! - Lithanial
sure it will... what we won't miss is another human

A question about life... I know this guy who has Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis. He'll die sooner or later, but until he dies he's miserable and he makes everyone else's life horrible. I lack the words to describe it. All I can say is I think he'd be better dead than the way he is now - complete paralysis, not being able to eat or breathe right. He'll probably die of suffocation after months of being like this... And we would still call it murder if someone decided to end his misery! And we still hope and pray and wait and wait and... It sucks! What's the solution for something like that? - Omuletzu
there is no real solution... and if i get to that point i'd want someone to kill me... i should be allowed to die when i want

I'd really like to find out why people choose to ignore me. How can I do that? - Omuletzu
i'll tell you why... it's the constant phone calls... emails... letters in the mail... midnight serenades and your bad breath... you are ignored in the hopes that you'll go away

I don't know what to ask, but I'm not feeling any better. It doesn't mean that I'm calm, it means that I can't express my rage. I should really learn how to do it. Maybe I could make a really sturdy sock monkey and start kicking it around every time I'm angry. Would that be so bad? I mean I try to live in the real world and they don't think of sock monkeys as beings - more like toys. Hey! Why am I writing about sock monkeys? Why am I writing about myself? Am I self-centered? Am I supposed to be selfless when everybody else is egocentric? I have yet to meet someone who wants what's good for me (excepting my parents). Is it a bit too late to be asking these questions (I'm 25)? - Omuletzu
don't be kicking me or i'll kick you... and no... it's too early...

I'm not done yet! Yeah, I've got issues and these questions are a way to sort them out. Yep, you missed your career with me. You should have been a psychiatrist. My question? Yeah, I know I write too many words meaning nothing. It's one of my many flaws. What's my purpose in life? Do I even have one? Does anyone? - Omuletzu
you pay me $100 an hour and i'll be your personal shrink... then i'll answer your questions

You know that red is an angry color. Will you ever make a more mellow layout with blues and greens?
not for this website... that would just be WRONG

Is there really such a thing as Dark Matter or all those scientists just 'hypothesizing' (ie- making up stuff) so they don't have to admit the old theorems don't work on that level (macro-space, or something sciency like that) and they simply don't know how to get the right answer without making up some 'mystical' element that permeated the entire universe yet can't be detected *directly* with their equipment? --Riku
its real but not really and if they did think they knew, they'd be wrong

what's the best way to terminate all hair growth in your nose?--quite smart, but it's well hidden

If a squirrel that has no sense of smell farts in the forest and nobody is around, does it really smell? FartMonkey
yes.. but not to the squirrel

Ok, I've got the wires connected...what do I do now? FartMonkey
lick them

The next time I pick up the phone and it turns out to be a telemarketer, I plan to shriek directly into the phone as loud as I can, then pour molten iron into the mouthpiece. Is this OK? FartMonkey
no... that might hurt your throat... rig your computer to emit the noises into the phone...

Which of these sounds, like, more correcter to you?: "Before he died, Jim was an active person." or "Jim was an active person before he died." Also does it matter that Jim died because I killed him? FartMonkey
the second one and no

My sister is fascinated by this thing where a guy is blabbing about what this guy is "building in there?" In the end, after all that blabbing, the dude doesn't even say what the guy IS building. How stupid is that? McDiablo
very stupid and i for one am outraged

Can one hurt themselves from bobbing their heads too much? McDiablo
yes... didn't your mom tell you?

What do you think of a guy whose lawn is dying? McDiablo
i think very evil things... mostly about ants

Why is there a lock and an emergency handle on the back of school buses? If you're going to steal one you just turn the emergency handle and it opens. So what's the need for the lock?
well on most buses the handle is on the inside and the lock is on the outside... unless i've been seeing those decoy buses the government sends out to monitor my activities

i want to kill my computer. will you come kill it for me?????? irish psycho
no... send it to me

Ok, you know the dude who was talking about telling their nephew that disneyland burned down in the last batch of questions you answered? And you said you're sure they ripped it off from somewhere? Well isnt it the dumb blonde joke where she's driving to Disneyland and sees a sign that says DISNEYLAND LEFT so she turned around and went home? It's not the same thing, but it's got the same jist to it...FartMonkey
the same jist would be that it's stupid and not funny

Would "The Insane Domain: where insanity runs rampant...and so can you" indicate that I can only run rampant within this site? Or does it mean that if I'm insane I can run rampant anywhere, and this is just a very good place to do it? FartMonkey
yes... and no... why would you want to be insane somewhere else?

How many times would a donkey dance if he could relaly actually dance?--Syko Morgana
twice a week

Do noodles dance when you arent watching?--Syko Morgana
no they dance when you're not watching... which sucks for you

if paranoia is a good sign that you are sane, what is a good sign of insanity and why? because people keep telling me stop being so paranoid u insane peice of shit, it confuses me so? can you help oh great one? oh and i might be able to help you with that playstation 2 and gta3
i say ignore those freaks and push them off your shelves... those stuffed toys can't push you around anymore... and are you sending me one?

Hey DC, should I have this wart removed? I think maybe it's posessed by evil clown demons. FartMonkey
yes... evil clown demons are the worst

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