aren't apples all the same size!? what's the point? why do the
bigger apples think they are cooler then the smaller ones? I don't
get it!? help please.
if all apples were the same size, then we'd have to
get whole new baskets... the point is usually lost to most people...
because the bigger apples ARE cooler then the smaller ones...
let a bee sting you does it make the bee look cooler in front
of all its other bee friends?
as it dies on the ground... damn straight it does!
white powdery substance under my grandmothers nose?... I asked
her and she took out a gun and said "im gunnah fuckin shoot
if you don't stop flappin ya gums bizniatch!" i'm scared!
listen to your granny... she's obviously high on powdered sugar...
tell your parents... they'll know what to do
people will listen or won't they? Are we waiting in vain?
what? i wasn't listening... anyways i think that sometimes
rice cakes aren't given proper consideration when choosing a nighttime
snack ... they come in many different flavors now
will definetly come with you if they wanna stay alive so who would
fine... i'd like a clown to amuse me, patton to sing
for his supper, stephen hawking to talk to, bob villa to build
me a working home, jcp to hang out with and some creepy artist
to build me impressive sculptures
the best option then?
i say go with burning the evidence
could learn to speak another language what would it be?
best way to deal with a stupid person?
distract them with shiny things or talk to them slowly
you tell the differance between stupidity and insaneness? Is there
like a fine line between the two?
it is indeed a fine line... so sometimes you can't
tell at all until after the consequences
people constantly act stupid?
they're not acting
no, its passed down through having children... infecting
the gene pool
happened to garfield?
he's sleeping right now...
favourite comic book?
hellspawn is wicked... and i have to mention my 2nd
a real place called Chilly Beach?
not that i'm aware of... but that
cartoon is pretty funny
do you while camping?
party... burn stuff... pass out... wake up... burn
some more stuff... repeat until you are told to leave
you think is the most insane out of you and jcp?
i'd say i am because she still refuses to use dead
rodents as puppets to perform the whole of stephen kings The Stand
the bigger fan of FNM you or Jcp?
jcp... have you seen her collection? she has her own
issues... most involving pattons voice
Can I take
advantage of you?
well larry has a stupid life and he knows that he is
just pretending to be what everyone tells him to be
do something about that damn neighbour?
yes... THEY MOVED OUT TODAY!!!!!!!!! YEA! YEA! YEA!
good at massages ? If so my neck needs a rub.
no... how about you show me by doing mine?
is it better to just go away?
yes it is... other times its better to start making
random noises until the person yelling at you just gets so fed
up they stop yelling and leave
your completely wrong about me?
sometimes... but not usually
this stupidity you speak of?
there's a spaceship parked on your doorstep... rice
pieces... it's always this way now
you be insane exactly?
it involves bagpipes and glass cleaner... if you can't
figure it out then you are not insane
say I can, can I?
no... unless i say you can
run rampant a lot?
yes i do... sometimes nude
you need new boots those ones look to christmasy and speaking
of christmas its not far away do you have plans and am I going
to get a gift?
xmas sucks and i don't celebrate it... in fact i am
TORTURED by my family during this time cuz i am forced to hang
out with them and endure small talk about the weather, who drives
what kind of car and blah blah blah
what year did the "Halloween" movies first take place?
that year in that place... and you know there were
rumors that they asked elvis to be in it but found out he was
movies were in the nightmare on elm street series, who features
too many of them...
teacher sounded like dickhead , I can't believe you had to listen
that's the fabulous world of schooling for you... its
the only reason i paid attention though
monkies throw their poop and do sock monkies throw poop or do
they even have any?
its fun to throw poop and sock monkeys eat their poop...
then get their holes sewed up
elton john raise his eyebrow after every syllable he sings???
is it a homosexual thing?
i think you're focusing on his eyebrows just a little
too much... perhaps you are afraid of admitting that you are homosexual...
but it's ok... we won't treat you any differently... we hate you
no matter what sex you like
ever imagined a world were there were no hypothetical questions??
twice and it hurt both times
yes... oh... no
I fart so much?
i'm not sure... just blame it on someone else
Do you think
there is an uprising inside the Lesbain community?
i'm not sure.. i'll go check and let
now i see
where your inspriation comes from. try coming up with someone
original once in a while damnit.
this isn't a question... yet it raises many...
british people have such beautiful teeth?
i blame bowie
omens were present in the play Julius Caesar by William Shakespeare?
12... and the phantom 13th one is just number 4 in
days have you been alive for?
at least 30
then why does 2+5=7? I don't get math. Could you possibly display
some oranges to help me out?
here are 8 oranges... i'm now going to throw 20 more
shreds of cheese do you put on your taco?
lots and lots and lots and lots and lots and lots
can recite the star spangled banner to me, I will make you cookies
and give you some milk.
i'm canadian... why the hell would i care what the
words are to that song? how about you sing me a song about
popcorn and bubbles and i'll give you a shiny penny
will I go to hell? - Mzebonga
yes, but only for a second or two
why didn't you
answer the questions yesterday were you trick or treatin!?
you are obviously in a different time
zone then me... as it is still halloween night as i answer these
do women constatly change their minds to indirectly the same thing?
i think you're confused with (most) men... (most) women
constantly change their minds to completely unrelated things and
then you're just nodding in agreement to end the conversation
good do you get many?
not always, but sometimes i get so many i don't know
what to do with them all
must be fun for you then? Who comes with you?
camping is quite fun if you take the right people with
you... i would like to go camping again
moved out, congratulations and are you having a party for that,
I think it deserves one?
so do i actually... drinks for everyone...
british people whiny ?
tight shoes and elton john are to blame
am I going to now?
send me your money
meanest thing you've done to someone?
had them sent to a shrink
Whats the best
joke you"ve played on someone?
my dad, brother and i made my mom get
out of the truck to see some cows, then drove off
you have the most fun with and whats a fun thing to do?
jcp and a fun thing to do is to take all your garbage
and remove it from where you are living cuz then you don't have
Sometimes you think you rock and sometimes you do rock,but not
today.And why do you think you rock?
i rock because i am a sock monkey
are people who find you charming?
not that i'm aware of
the fewest words you can use to get out that door?
a spackle, and how many can you fit in a pyramid? Witto.
spackle is that stuff you use to make walls look strange
and i'm guessing 2... maybe 3
biscuit tins have so much space with no biscuits in? Witto.
biscuit companies are CHEAP
you need a life as well
the moon made of cheese? It should be. Witto.
it isn't? then why the hell try so hard to get there???
there was a nightmare site where is it
yes there is i guess... it's just one page right now...
and there is a link to it if you know where to look for it...
the older versions of it have been removed for awhile now
the point to this website ???
the point is that its all free
come over and eat potatoes and tuna with me?
i'll eat the potatoes but i don't eat meat/fish
Can you give
us a real reason why you don't like us Americans? You know, we
could just run up through your stupid worthless country and take
over if we wanted.
the things that were last weekend have the things that love the
potatos and they seem to see that i am NOT THE ONE THAT BROKE
THE SOAP NO MOM I DIDNT DO IT so then what would you think of
i think that my skin itches and that the spider that
i didn't kill the other day is somewhere waiting for me
hell did you do to your whinnie to send him to a shrink?
i touched his bottom
know what photosynthisis is? My girlfriend is always talking about
say no and run far far away
So if your
nieghbours moved out then you might get more bad ones move in
shut up if that happens then i will have to beg for
a laptop in jail
you think of skid marks?
they are uncalled for
idea of a good free time?
doing whatever i want and someone else pays
So is the
idiot training for me?
you and the others
So if we
do that stuff in the in the supermarket we might get thrown out?
maybe... although you never know
suck don't they?
wants a beaver?
they use their teeth
absolutely no good reason why we are alive. If the only motive
to continue living is to procreate my species than i might as
well kill myself because theres nothing else to live for. Just
take this and shove it in my eye, it'd feel better than sitting
her thinking about the meaninglessness of my existence. In the
whole grand scheme of things we are nothing, less than a speck,
we are the bacteria in the armpits of some quark in space. I am
one human being out of 6 billion on this one planet out of 900
trillion in this one galaxy out of an infinite number of possible
galxies out there. It hurts my head. i hate speech. penny for
why are you assuming there has to be a point? and i'd like
way more then a penny
cross breed a sheep and a kangaroo do u really get a wolly jumper??
I think i've found my calling in life - to test this theory
please do and then send us the results... are they anything like
those kangaroo things on tank girl
ever tried to imagine a world where there are no hypothetical
yes but it hurt
how clean is it?
what would you know?
i'm trying but it still hurts
is bad for us then why?
why why why why why wah wah wah wah
Is it alright
to come out on a full moon?
Whats makes you
smoke and mirrors
you so mysterious?
its the eyes
you cooking for dinner?
i'm not sure what 'cooking' means but i'm having pizza
be fun again?
its always fun
want sex with you anyway?
i'm not sure but if you find them please have them
contact me immediately
What do you do
to your sockmonkies when they've been bad?
spank their bottoms
you do to your sockmonkies when they've been good?
spank their bottoms
What do you do when
your socks runaway?
cry and cry until they return
little odd looking sometimes aren't you?
all the time
didn't ask for your second favourite?
i guess not but i have no clue what you're talking
about so instead i'll just complain that the bulb in my lava lamp
has burnt out
can just get out ?
leave me alone for one minute? And stop doing that its so annoying?
hell no... this is fun fun fun in the sun sun sun
Do we have
to play faith no more again?
no... i like them and all but i don't need to hear
them all the time
fav album from FNM and mr bungle?
angel dust and california
to dress up as you for Halloween but I couldn't find your costume.
Where may I be able to find it so I will be the hippest kid circling
the block next year.
well we're working on that... a full sized sock monkey outfit
is something that takes some planning
Is that an arrow?
i don't see one anywhere
Is it possible
for 2 retarded people to have sex? Or would they just drool on
each other all night long?
yes it is and if they liked that sort of thing then
take the KIND out of kindergarten when you were a younging?
took it out and pissed on it
the point? Witto
oranges called oranges but pineapples not called ochre? Witto
they are... what the hell is wrong with YOU?
sanimals questions rarely updated? Witto
no one asks that twit questions
a speedboat, didn't he? - Mzebonga
ask Dave Dingle a question,dc? Well, after much delay, the lazy
bastard has answered it. You may return to www.mzebonga.com/swahili
to see his answer - Mzebonga
i couldn't find it... are you trying to pull the wool over my
eyes or has my insanity blurred my vision
jump into a dumpster full of dead hamsters for $10 million?
the kids at my daughters school are talking about the purple monkey.....can
you tell me what this is in reference to?
no i can't... and don't you ask her about it either...
it will only lead to bad thoughts... if she mentions the purple
dinosaur, then you leave with her in the night and never return
Why the FUCK
are you such a fucking tool? take my dad's side. i'll show you
you're a bratty brat brat brat...
left at the ranch, then right at the police depot then keep going
for about 500 yards and at the end of the road is a place where
I can screw all the whores I want for five bucks? - Mzebonga
yes... can you give me a ride?
make color guard?
sure, in face anyone who reads this can make some color
u do if your gay but you dont want your girlfriend to know
hide your boyfriend under the bed
i worry that i have a green growth on my third head?
only if it turns purple on thursdays
a green dragon
i'd like a red one that grants me wishes and eats stupid
this flurbaby have such a small head? and why is joanna here??
sometimes you need a small head so if they try to put
a leash on you then you can just slip out of it and that korn
video was on where they all have straight jackets and that's not
fair i want a straight jacket too but a black one
else had problems with their surgically attached penis?
i'll ask around... maybe a few strangers on the street
will show me how theirs are
boom? what is your political thoughts on northern ireland.or don't
you care!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! - keglineq
dum-a-chum but don't get me started... as for ireland
i have no political views on them... but that guy that dances
from there should be shot in the kneecaps and forced to dance
till he dies
americans call american football football when it has hardly anything
to do with feet. its crazy.
you answered your own question... i mean does any of
this really make any sense?
my friends always stroke my head?
just be glad that people want to touch you
toes look so funny?
i'm not sure... i hate feet and toes... so i don't
look at them
have a serious disability: they cannot apply their makeup correctly.
i once witnessed a terrible sight... my ex girlfriend has very
pale skin all over her body, and sometimes she would cake her
face in cosmetics - JUST HER FACE! i thought it was halloween
for god sake, take off the damn mask woman! anyway, my question
is "why do women do this?"
well not all women do this... so the trick is to avoid the ones
that do... i have no idea what possesses them to do so, but at
least they are making it obvious so we can identify and ignore
in the "How 2" section, under "Wisdom". Can
you see? - Mzebonga
oh yea.. my tail was in the way so i couldn't see it...
wanna touch my tail?
WANT TO SPANK MY MONKEY?
no but you can touch my tail
ever branded "crazy" simply becuse you have ideas that
are different than everybody else? and if you are crazy is that
so bad?some carzy poeple seem to be happy, dont you think?--db"_"
yes... and i don't think its so bad as long as you
keep in mind that others have different pain tolerances then you
do...and crazy people are just able to enjoy the smaller things
in life... the things that most people don't think twice about..
you can be just as happy if you paid attention
is it possible
to be addmited to an asylum for retierment?some say it's never
too late.how are you feeling today?--db"_"
i'm not sure but maybe i'll look into it... i'm feeling
ok today i guess... my feet are cold
Why r men
because they are human... its the same reason for the
females being so stupid
you already sick of all the Christmas shit everywhere??
i hate just the thought that it's out there... i have
so far steered away from any xmas related items...
the belly button fluff you pick out when you're bored not always
the same colour as your t-shirt? When wearing a blue shirt it
should be blue, so why is it red, when you don't even own a red
top, let alone wear one? Witto
bellybuttons are little black holes in your body...
they collect small items and occasionally spew out stuff.... since
time doesn't exist to these little black holes, it can spew out
any colored item it wants at any point in time regardless of anything
else going on around it including you and your horrible taste
u a faggot
i love you and want to fuck you up
would win this celebrity deathmatch: Bea Author or Phyllis Diller
bea arthur... i think she would fight dirtier... just
as long as they don't fight naked
why does jonathan
look like a gay boy and grin at us alllllllll the time like a
skull and never stop. i just stare back but then he looks back
and i go all ughhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. i had to wash my arm
after the air he carries brushed it. i'm gonna be sick. but anyways
after you've answered that question answer this almighty DC....how
caome , if we evolved from monkeys is there still monkeys running
arouynd in monkey form.....is there an evolved form of sock monkeys?-keglineq
well jonathan has gotten fat from sitting on his ass eating bad
food... he grins because he thinks he's all wonderful now, that
he can just whine about how love sucks and wah wah he has to fuck
lots of willing people... well how sad and maybe you should just
beat the fuck out of him to remind him what pain really is again...
and sock monkeys are not genetically related to any life on this
tell the others... it takes 4
u get if u cross breed a sock monkey with glove?- pumpkinmuncher
sock monkey puppet
the new questions suck??? Like mine?
well you suck, and like many of the others you don't
give me cash which makes you suck worse
I don't like
apple sauce. If we can have applesauce, why can't we have cherry
sauce? cherry sauce would taste a lot better because cherries
are good and more people like cherries. Cherries make us happy.
How about we make some cherry sauce together? How's Friday?--Cherry
apple sauce is kinda sick to have all swished around in your mouth...
cherry sauce would suck because i don't like cherries that much...
but i will make cherry sauce with you on friday... we'll get nice
are on fire...and the ceiling is laughing at me...stop it!
the chickens are just messing with your mind and the
ceiling needs to be pissed on to shut it up
the next Croatian underwater masturbating llama convention, using
cheese wire? STE
November 24th, 8PM... bring your own goggles... contact
your local leader for transportation and accomedations
anything bigger than a Killion? BARCLAY
a woman have a hairy ass?
ask her... for all you know it could be a medical thing
and then wouldn't you feel bad? yea me neither but it had to be
think that single-sex girl schools produce women who drink from
the "furry cup", if you know what I'm getting at? BARCLAY
i knew a barclay once... or was it berkley? either
way he had some serious computer addiction problems.... and he
became a spider once... but anyways no i don't think it produces
women like that, and if they do in your area... then please call
me to come down and monitor the situation with webcams
Hannah smell like a burning building?
well first of all i'd like to know how large this 'hood'
is and how it is that all these people can fit into it at once
a detachable penis, should I be worried?
not at all unless it gets lost on the bus
frogs ruled the world and made us eat frogspawn???
as long as i still get my internet and music then i'd
my pills ever run out?
we all have to live with that fear... but have faith
in the pill-givers... they need us to eat the pills to keep them
alive so there will always be pills... always be pretty little
pills for everyone to solve everything
we go out on tuesday and don't give me that line your busy go
out with me dammit?
well i have to make sticky stuff with someone... oh
that's friday... then you can come over tuesday but bring some
food and coffee and when i get bored of you then i want you to
leave as soon as i say to
sign me up then
was an otherside what would it be like?
i always imagined it'd be purple and kinda warm...
maybe have some stuff to do... chill for awhile
So if there
was the cat and the dog who came next?
the little boy for the dog and cat to feast on for
run rampant with me? I won't go nude though I refuse, and put
your clothes on please?
if we're not nude then whats the point... well... a
good insanity romp is fun... ok i'll get dressed and go with you
Do I look
like a drunken sailor? - Mzebonga
more importantly... do you fuck like one?
Can I stand
around with yellow jello on the wednesday?
no... jello is not allowed
good at sex? Like are you good at the positions? And are you good
at foreplay and will you hug me afterwards?
i always get an A for effort in 'the positions'...
i have practised foreplay but haven't been officially tested so
maybe i'll hug you if you agree to point me in the direction of
a testing facility... and does anyone want to help me study?
So if it
hurt both times then I might do it again ?
probably... i mean sometimes the pain feels good
pink spandex is unnessesary?
it is NEVER necessary... and nor is white spandex on
I go a little bit insane?
but it's so fun... fun fun fun in the sun sun sun
Can I help
yes, i would like a large coffee with 2 sugars... can
i drive through now?
people should just do their jobs?
sometimes? we should all do our jobs...
pushing the daises?
some of us are... others will do so in a little while
i love boats and can handle them as long as someone
else drives them
those dust bunnies cleared away again somehow they found their
way back? Mysterious isn't it?
they always return... there is no escape... no escape...
you do If you had one day to spend with Mike Patton?
i'd make him take me to the recording studio to see
what goes on... then have him record a bunch of stuff for me so
i can make my own songs... and i'd buy a copy of tomahawk from
him cuz they don't have it at the cd store here yet... oh... and
i'd have him teach me how to scream without it hurting
a freaks annonymous place? You know where freaks go to become
this is basically freaks anonymous... and a real freak
doesn't want to become human...
you are just breathtaking?
well who isn't when they first wake up and have no
give that back, its private?
fine... but i've already showed it to all my friends
you are great and Jcp is great also when are we going to see more
thanx!... jcp has the camera for business purposes
so it may be awhile longer... sally has generously submitted some
photos to me though and i will upload a few of those shortly
hello milky way
your favorite band after faith no more? last time you said...
"That's a tough one... among the possible answers are Korn,
Type O Negative (although their new album BLOWS), Smashing Pumpkins,
Pop Will Eat Itself, David Bowie, Mr. Bungle, Godsmack, Alice
In Chains, and plenty others... It really depends on my mood!"
has this changed?
well i don't like type o negative anymore... i've grown weary
of them... and you can now add tomahawk to that list... and godsmack
is ok but shouldn't be on my fav band list
your idea of the perfect job
having one of my favorite bands paying me to oversee
their website, create all the content/graphics, write articles
for it and interview them and stuff and get all their cds free
and get to travel around with them to see the many hotel rooms
of the world so i can take pictures and write articles for this
site... oh and the band can use any of the lyrics i've written
cuz there's no way that i'll ever use them
are stupid. i dont want to be human. cani be a cat? or a sock
monkey? - Fido Dido
you are stuck being a human until we can free up some
more sock monkey bodies... and that is assuming that you'll pass
all the rigorous testing needed to become a sock monkey
money should I get for sexual favours??? I think I'm being ripped
well you come over here... perform all your sexual
favors on me and i'll tell you how much you should charge
getting bored of answering the same meaningless questions???
sometimes yes... but if you send me money it will all
be worth it
Am I annoying
you? What About Now? Or Now? Now?
do fuck like a drunk sailor but only in good ways. I don't suffer
from brewers droop as I'm usually sober. Is this satisfactory?
yes it will do for now but don't get lazy and stop
you done the october results. I want to see if I got a good answer
award. - Mzebonga
yea yea... i'm getting to it... jcp has been doing
it lately and i'm just not as good as her
to live forever? - Mzebonga
i'm not sure but if you come here i'll show you what
i think it is...
the biggest mistake i have made in my life?
that time you agreed to eat that pudding even though
you didn't know it was not pudding at all
I got a
question for ya... What the hell does that woman from "The
Weakest Link" have stuck up her ass??? huh??? shes a total
she? oh... i wasn't aware it was a she
mouth is a blistering 98% then when it gets cold out couldn't
we just stick our hands on our mouth?
do you know how many germs are on your hands? too many
to go around sticking them into your mouth...
jello? It's red?
jello is some sick shit
the dust bunnies keep returning and how can I get rid of them
for good? Sally
there is no escape unless you lick the floor every
day to ensure they don't come back
come Sally gets to send in pictures can i send stuff in?
well we're going to start doing that soon... we'll
allow some of you freaks to send in photos
get your perfect job with the band I want to take the pictures
,can I ? , I like taking pictures. Sally
well no, but only because i want it to be part of my
should go to otherside together then?
laughs at everyone if you throw a rock at it that will totally
shut the wanker up right?
usually... unless it's being lippy and then you gotta
slap it silly
could involve some rope,whipped cream,chocolate sauce,a leather
strap,silk scarf,massage oil,use your mouth and hands alot and
and put that tongue in a few places as well.Use you imagination?
i don't want to eat the whipped cream but won't object
to it being there... and i ALWAYS use my imagination
to ask this what does a drunken sailor fuck like?
well i was drunk at the time so i forget... how about
this time you get drunk and report back
people go to me your weird then you look at them and think they
are weird,why do some people think they are normal and they aren't?
everyone has their own 'version' of reality and most
times their version sucks
often do you see jcp?
too often for her liking... almost every day
happen if you didn't have the internet? Have you ever been without
it for a period of time?
well then i'd have to amuse myself some other way like
reading or flinging things out my window... yes i have i have
been known to be without the internet for up to a week... but
that hasn't happened in quite some time
the October questionnaire questions going to be answered?
is my favourite place on earth. why? -keglineq
well because its a wonderful place to be... and we're
working on more stuff (and yes your damned questionnaire results!)
so keep coming back...
questionnaire answers, in the answers to the question "what's
the most insane thing you've ever done while drunk or stoned,"
ninja x said that he hijacked a plane and crashed it into the
pentagon. wasn't that questionnaire pre- 9/11? if so, that's some
i doubt that it is before that happened
version of who wants to be a millionaire must be for retards cos
the questions are so easy. how come americans seem to be so stupid
and had to steal the gameshow. does canada have a version?? -keglineq
i don't know because i don't watch those sort of shows... i'm
not a huge fan of television in general
should i clean my ears?-the on hoo cnt spel
hourly with sticks
happen if you didn't have music?
i would throw myself from a building
guess where i am and how come me and my friends always ask questions???
you are in a large box and you ask questions because
he is Qbryzan... insane guy from the outside... we
know as much as you do about him
and the window is open but i can't reach. what should i do? -keglineq
give up and write a goodbye letter in the carpet with
a bikini wax??? would you ever???????????????? that full brazillian
one? ow?? -keglineq
no and no
sick of me yet? -keglineq
almost but not quite yet... it's fido dido who needs
to be beaten
turning green. is it anything to do with her detachable penis??
did you know she is also pumkinmuncher and that one who can't
spell but proved herself wrong when she spelt everything right
in her question?
too bad for suzi and i'm not your vet or doctor...
instead of talking about a detachable penis, we should be discussing
the state of smell today... i mean smells waft by... and then
disappear and i'm not even sure what it is i'm smelling anymore
joanna chuckle so heartily?
i don't know but its pissin me off
are you and are you free on saturday?
i'm 24 and i'm not sure yet... why
puberty hit for a sock monkey?
the second our butts are sewn up
romance? never heard of it
waydowntown... the dark tower series by stephen king
and the pasta
issues does jcp have with pattons voice?
she seems to really like it and all his music...
does jcp's husband think of her site?
i haven't asked him... i think he likes it though
the effect on plants with colored light
a severe beating to you for asking
this site suck so bad?
its all that crap that sanimal wrote and that lady
in Yukon who writes us letters saying that we have bad manners
show me how to make balloon animals
yes... here you go
humans amused by the stupidest things? Is technology making people
extremely lazy, causing them to become even dumber than they already
humans are just stupid so they're easy to amuse...
and some technology is making people lazy... i blame society
there's always room for jello? - Mzebonga
i'm sure there is room for it, but i'm not putting
that shit down my throat
to be the first person to get a good question award for not really
writing a question. So, I have to think up something insightful
and interesting to write about. I find myself at a loss. The point
is that, I think, te world has lost all its insight and interest,
we live in a world dominated by Republicans and NRA members, it's
a very scary but also very stupid and dangerous world we live
in nowadays. I'm inclined to believe that the stupider an American
politician is, the more power he can acquired, do I need to raise
the name of Jesse Ventura the senator for Minnesota and for wrestler?
What's going on with all of this crap? (Damn! I asked a question.
Ho hum, I best cover it up and make it look rhetorical). The point
is, regardless of the whos and wheres, things just appear to be
finding the lowest common denominator. Like Beavis and Butthead,
there are very few advanced principle filtering down to those
who are at the lowest level, he politicians keep all the difficult
bits and the bits that might not look so good away from the ordinary
people and contribute to the "dumbing down" of modern
day society. No wonder when I walk down the street, all I see
is morons. So, I say, demand more from your politicians and hold
them to account, it is your democratic duty. And if you'll believe
that, you'll believe anything. I'm a monkey, you're a banana:
I'm gonna easy you all up - after I've peeled you. If this gets
a long answer I would be very surprised and I may even offer my
sexual skills up for a free trial to all regular InsaneDomain
visitors. Isn't that kind? - Mzebonga
you'll always find your way through it all, for the wise man is
the one who realizes that everyone else is stupid and must be
exploited for our own good but at the same time you don't want
to do that to people who aren't selfish horrible driving assholes
who need to be instead killed with a coat hanger and perhaps some
corn flakes and as you can now tell i'm only going to type a lot
of stuff that really has no direct connection to what you wrote
above so that you will be confused enough to give us all free
you give me a good question award? - Mzebonga
well if i just gave it away to any old question then
it wouldn't be that great for those who did ask a good question
hell I'm not a freak your the freak dammit. I know I'm a bit wierd
but only sometimes. I thought I might be special or something?Sally
yes i am the freak... and everyone is special in their
own special way... at least that's what my mom says
has a problem with rogue nasal hairs, shes asked me why boys wont
talk to her but i dont have the heart to tell her that her nose
hairs make me want to upchuck my intestines, what should i do
DC??? (ive kinda got used to her webbed feet and i dont think
thats why she gets no attention cause they're not that visible)-the
on hoo cnt spel
have a sleepover and do them while she's asleep... or sit down
with her and tell her... or just reach over one day and give them
a nice yank and then say 'oh i'm sorry i thought it was a hamster."
happen you stop to think for a while... and then forget to start
that happens a lot when i'm forced to go to family
functions ... my one aunt and uncle live in this rich neighborhood
and the stupidity of what goes on is incredible... i'm not sure
but i think that each item in the house has been chosen to make
you feel uncomfortable... so we sit in their 'sitting room' (a
whole room for sitting on horrible furniture) and stare out the
window talking about shit for hours until they feed you and you
can finally leave... i begin to think again on the way home (for
i would never stop thinking completely until i die or i become
just like the rest of those fuckers out there that i hate so much)
and on the way home i think about how petty most of my family
is and what grandma's problem is with fat people
i looked i had 10 toes now i seem to be sprouting 3 every half
an hour or so how can i stop this visicious circle of sprouting
toes?-the on hoo cnt spel
cut them off, put them in jars and sell them to hospitals
for all those people who lose theirs at work... you could make
millions... so be sure to send some my way (money, not toes)
i'm not sure... try catching some of those large ones
in your mouth though.. its fun
people think romance is important ?
i'm not sure... it's the art of distracting someone
into thinking you're cool long enough for you fuck them
cause i be thinkin i do gibber-the on hoo cnt spel
gibberish is just crap with no thought...
nonsense is when you've said something that others don't want
to think about so they say "that's nonsense"
the rath of HERILOGRAPS (praise be) cause he is visiting the earth
this isn't a question... and i will not give praise
to anyone who doesn't give me money to do so... unless i like
them and think they need praise
until you want to beat me?? -keglineq
i've wanted to beat you from the beginning... everyone
is on my list of 'To Be Beaten'... its just a matter of where
you are on that list
i've seen many orchestras perform and i would have
to say that the flutes bother me greatly
is next. what is after?? -keglineq
going home to think about physics and getting off this
on hoo cnt spel
there are lots of germans out there
cackling insanely while sending questions in for you to answer.
should i be scared?? -keglineq
always be scared... i don't know when the announcement
came to everyone saying "Everything is great. No need
to worry about others around you or your actions."
I mean of course there is a danger in flying, of course there
is a danger in being in a tall building, of course others are
out to get you, of course there are religious idiots out there
who just want to make things suck for you, of course there are
people who's insanity isn't all that funny, of course everyone
in the world sucks ass in some way and the odds are the idiots
in majority will never really be all that smart... so always be
when the rythm starts to play will you dance with me and make
only if you promise to put out afterwards
obvious please? -keglineq
the sun is pretty big compared to the earth's size
really run rampant here?? -keglineq
yes, but leave your socks on so we don't have to get
the floors done again... you know if we ever do get a store or
something for the domain in real life, you will be welcome to
run around rampantly naked in it all you want
i've heard rumors but you know how reliable those are
why? because joanna stroked it......apparently there's a difference
between stroking and playing -keglineq
yes there is... stroking is consistent while playing
is sort of random... you can come over and do both to my tail
or alternative? -keglineq
i'll take all three together
is mucho clever, i think u should give her a colum to write in
your site.(possibly about the effects of sellotaping your fingers
together and trying to type) whad'ya think?-the on hoo cnt spel
well everyone seems to think they need their own column
do they? well if we put everyones stuff online then that
would be a lot of work for stuff that isn't ours... but since
jcp seems to like you people (i don't know why you're all brats)
she says that she'll be making an area to have you people submit
your own stuff
i am? -keglineq
beat me now? -keglineq
questions are too many questions? well? tell me! how many? are
u gonna tell me? why arent u telling me? is this too many?-the
on hoo cnt spel
there are so many questions... they haunt me in my sleep... but
keep me getting up in the morning
of the world would you like to visit?
any part i haven't seen... but if all the stupid people
in the planet and shit like that was gone then i'd see egypt,
china, england, basically europe and then come back and see the
rest of canada... then go see south america and africa.
Is it good
to be around the mini bar?
yes it is... all the drunk people end up coming back
for more and you just take your pick
to know what the deal with bellybuttons and the lint that they
contain is? And who has the sexiest bellybutton? Do you like bellybutton
jewellry? What is the best way to get great abs to show off your
bellybutton? How does the lint get in there? Do sockmonkeys like
to eat the lint out of bellybuttons? Is there a conspiracy about
the whole situation?
i already told someone about the lint... check page 30 or 29 for
it... hmm... i can't come up with anyone off the top of my head
with a sexy bellybutton as i usually aren't paying attention to
them... and on some people bellybutton jewelry is quite sexy...
i would suspect that working out would get you great abs but i
have no further information available on that subject... yes sock
monkeys like to eat the lint, but we'll eat anything (well i won't
eat meat either but not all sock monkeys are vegetarians) and
there is ALWAYS a conspiracy going on about everything
the best way to go?
sometimes... send me pictures and make sure to keep
best way for me to embarass you?
this sounds like a trick
I got a green Good Question Award yet? Witto
you haven't asked a good question
I asked you a question for a few days? Witto
you were out collecting money on street corners to
send to me
red or grey socks sexy? Witto
sure they are... just not together
this do? Witto
i'm not sure but that light went off
you do what you do to me? If I knew how you do what you do to
me, then I'd do it to you. Witto
well i can tell you how to do it to me
Can I have
a sock monkey? Witto
not yet... you haven't gone through the proper training
To be or
not to be? Witto
if given the choice i'd go with NOT for many people
well they're stupid and shouldn't be here to take up
space and food
Left or right?
right, but i can write with both hands
is it? Witto
depends on the day and what i'm thinking about
Is it okay
to have a fantasy about hammering Jesus in the doo-doo hole while
he masturbates to photos of livestock while you watch Santa laying
a turd on a strippers tum? Witto
yes... you are allowed to have fantasies about anything you want
that? Over there? You know, that! There look! Witto
it looks like a large pile of shit and blubber... oh
no wait... that's the lady from next door
dealio with this site???? are u trying to impress someone??
we're trying to impress our pets, some old people and
the wives of rock stars
or Bob Mortimer? Sausage Rolls or Cheese and Onion Pasties? The
theory of evolution for sock monkeys - discuss.
neither cuz i have no idea who they are... cheese &
onion cuz i don't eat meat... and i can't disclose that information
to you or i will be forced to slap your ass with something nasty
(i'm not sure what yet)
it taking so long for the answers to be posted from the questionaire?
Also I'd like to know: why they don't make ceiling tiles out a
cheese? that way it could age and then they could change them
every few months. Why don't they? --InsaneLane
it's done damint so enough already! as for the
cheese ceiling tiles... well if they were cheese then lots of
people would be on their chairs trying to get some for their sandwiches
and then all the smart people who don't fall off their chairs
will be stuck doing all the work
it that you work as a computer consultant but somehow can't handle
putting the results together? Should I be looking for a new sock
monkey to answer questions or can you still handle that? You suck
grrrrrr.... as if any other sock monkey could possibly do this...
you couldn't possibly lure another out of the rainforest to do
your nasty website updating
you're such a fucking loser! i say you get fired and we get to
beat you with bats ... what do you think???? should i enter all
my questions in twice in case you lose the first one? SAnimal
i think we should fire YOU ... i certainly don't see any SAnimal
section that is getting any sort of visits
if i ate
everyone here, would the flag still sing "umpa-umpa",
and dance with the midnight president of the mole people? - Fido
yes, but don't eat SAnimal because he's a bitter piece
can i beat
witto? - Fido Dido
only on a friday
all, and is it true? damn them all, and is it false? - Fido Dido
yes and not always... for damning doesn't do the damage
that eating does
all thats on tv nowadays. secs. and sects. just sects. join the
dots to from a person, and eat their bollocks stuffed with a light
cheese sauce. yes? - Fido Dido
i prefer a heavy cheese sauce spread across my ass
cheeks... what were we talking about? i got distracted by the
idea of having heavy cheese sauce spread across my ass cheeks
and yes i said it twice cuz that's how good it feels
Hi DC Thanks
for the Good Question award!!! i so im friends with those strange
people, one of which is keglineg, anywho...i was wondering since
u like socks so much for some reason, what is ur favortie kind
and where is ur favoorite place to wear then apart from on ur
feet?? - Wolfram
people actually know each other and admit to it on
this site? how insane... the soft warm type are my favorite and
they have to have the shape so i know exactly where my heel goes
in it too... i hate those stupid socks that try to be all PC and
let me decide where i want my own heel to go but damnit that kind
of creativity is just a waste of time... i like to wear them on
my hands and put on sock puppet shows
prefere normal socks...or socks with individual toe holes, and
why?? - Wolfram
when i am in a 'party' mood i like to wear the ones
with individual toe holes... for the average day i prefer normal
I saw the
link saying to tell you how stupid you are and I could resist.
You are the following: Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid. Stupid.
Stupid. Stupid. That's a whole lot of stupid, which just about
makes you normal. Shall we get drunk and kill God? How about just
killing the British Royal Family? - Mzebonga
yes i know i didn't mean to delete them... jcp and
her big mouth... i will gladly take out the royal family, as we
all know they exist right now... well most of them
happening to the What Ifs? My can't I find the new ones!!! Is
it because my 2 wives are both mad at me? --InsaneLane
they haven't been updated and i refuse to do them so
jcp can do them her damn self since she's so perfect at putting
together all the answers and stuff so THERE
can you fuck someone like an animal AND feel them from the inside??
well if you are fucking them, then that means that
you have something inside of them that is part of you (unless
it's a strap on or something but we'll pretend that this is just
involving a guy and girl)... so if the guys dick is in the chick
and if the guy can feel his dick then he should be able to both
fuck like an animal and feel (through his dick) from the inside...
unless this is meant to mean that the fucking happens first, then
perhaps the skinning of the other person to wear their skin as
a costume... in which case they would feel the other person from
the inside too...
Can I buy
all the whores for sale? I want them so I can throw rocks at them
and so that I can vent all my anger out onto them. Sally
yes you may... i think mzebonga has been returned so
i'll give you discount... you may throw all the rocks you want
and vent any anger that you've ever felt
you just need to be soothed? Butterfly's Crazy
yes i do... would you like to come comfort me?
you just need to have a friend?Butterfly's Crazy
sometimes but i can always put my sock on my hand and
pretend i have one... or even a girlfriend
do you think you give bad advice?Butterfly's Crazy
be like that? Butterfly's Crazy
too bad for you unless you'd like to comfort me
bother explaining I still blame you,It was all you ,you ,you?
yes it was me and i admit it... go on... give me a
totally uncalled for? Butterfly's Crazy
i don't see why it wasn't
rather a sockmonkey or a human for your companion? Which is better?
sock monkey because the body is easier to dispose of
without questions... besides... humans talk too much
not a trick honest?
yea i just bet
really wanna beat me? Where am I the list I'll just runaway anyway
and I don't deserve it. Sally
i want to beat everyone... nothing personal... you're
not real high up on my list yet... there is a whole family tree,
coworkers and ex-classmates that need to be dealt with before
i start tracking down others
seen my chip?, last time i looked it was on my shoulder but it
seems to have gone missing-the on hoo cnt spel
i think i sat on it... when it works its way out again i'll be
sure to return it
u find sooo much time to answer all these questions? - Wolfram
i usually answer them when i wake up... i just work
the time into my day cuz i'm online at most points anyways
to also have lost my marbles and i have a big match comming up
so if you see them can you send them to me pls?-the on hoo cnt
yes... i put the marbles up my nose... i'll dig them out later
why are my friends attracted to
animated characters or different species? (aladdin and strangely
green dinosaur/dragon here please?
right.. as if that will work
that the "regulars" aren't getting as many good question
awards. Have we exhausted all our questions? - Mzebonga
i'm trying to push you to the next level of insanity... i know
you can do it
So if there
was a pickle on the ground would you eat it?
sure why not
happened to Kellykins?
kellykins is still around! she hangs out with
jcp and apparently they are 'kidders' and people say they're always
'kidding' around... i'm not the only person here with issues as
you can tell...
happen if I had un protected sex with a peacock, and I found out
I was pregnant afterwards?
well you should know the consequences of having sex
with an unprotected cock.. you should get yourself checked for
diseases too... and stay away from the petting zoo from now on...
the next level of insanity, is that like play station 2's third
place? And what is the third place any way? And if the third place
is so special, and I pressume the first places is here and now,
then what is the second place? Is like the first place a developing
place, the third place a developed place and the second place
a place with communist government? - Mzebonga
the third place is that uncertain gray area where 1 and 2 didn't
seem to fit, but you suspect that one of them was supposed to
and that you must be strange for not thinking that it fit right
and is there any such thing as a perfect fit anyways and if so...
it doesn't last forever... just for that moment of perfection...
the communists have nothing to do with it for once
to eat yellow snow or red snow?
depends on why it's red... if it's just blood then
fine... but if some chick has recently given birth in the snow
and the little bits that come out with a baby are left on the
snow... then i would eat the yellow snow instead
television for woman? Isn't also tv for gay men?
well i'm not sure... why do you watch it? i know
that once i came across this show where this stupid chick was
trying to fix thing (i think it's called a repair to remember
or anything i can do) but this chick has got to be the dumbest
person on the planet... why anyone would pay this chick anything
to even wake up in the morning is beyond me and you should all
write her hate letters telling her how stupid she is... anyways...
how can a channel be just for women or just for men? i mean
whoever watches it watches it...
the 'DC' in your name actually mean...?
insane, in one form or another?
most people no... they're just stupid... only smart
people are insane because some bit of you has to be insane to
deal with all the stupid people...
in an Indian leg wrestling match, Al Pacino or Robert DeNiro?
Even Robert DeNiro himself couldn't answer this one... can you,
i'll go with robert deniro cuz his mean faces are way more scary
then al's... plus i think he'd be more willing to play dirty
you think that youve posted the question results...but you havnt.
just letting you know... i suppose id better glorify this with
a question. i dont suppose you could tell we why faeries insist
on inhabiting our pool table? they make playing rather difficult.
yes i have... just letting YOU know... and if you would
just ask the faeries directly then i'm sure they would reply..
but you think you're too good for fairy folk don't you?
yea that's what i thought...
he is just a huge asshole...
To be honest
I think if you had any other sockmonkey on here it just wouldn't
be the same. Dc Just wasn't thinking I'm sure ,what were you thinking?
no it wouldn't be the same... and i wasn't thinking
so shut up... i only deleted about 6 peoples replies and then
jcp had to get all yappy about it ... ingrates!
you like to be comforted? Butterfly's Crazy?
you can start by rubbing my tail...
it is a trick but come on humor me here?
well i would humor you but i have no socks on to make
puppets out of and perform plays for you
the next level of insanity ? I don't think I can do it. Sally
oh i know you can... just a little more sugar and you'll
be ready for anything....
god put men on this earth
that's like asking why santa made all his elves short
is the average dildo?
well i wasn't sure since i prefer the larger ones...
so i phoned your mother and she informed me that the average was
about 6 to 8 inches and that she prefers the type that have disney
characters on them
can't beleive you did that :( you lost some of myanswers from
the questionnaire :(:( okmaybe it was for the best cos lets face
it i'm notparticularly funny but my compis crap and my spacebar
is broken andi'm confused!!!! help me? i can get you a tomahawk
i'm sorry i lost your answers... i will gladly help
you do anything for a tomahawk cd... i still don't have a copy!
it so damn hot in here?
because you have a fever
some people think they are funny and then they're not?
it happens all the time... they are amused by themselves
and don't notice that no one else is laughing with them
If it were
okay to bang on drums would you?
yes.. in fact once i have the space to do so... i want
to get some drums and start pounding on them
it ever okay to get dressed up in a cowboy/cowgirl outfit?
when is it NOT ok?!
take a look in the mirror and tell me what you see?
a monkey with an attitude and a lovely tail
you go along with that?
maybe... depends on how late it was
So if there
was a cat and a dog in a fight who would win and why?
the cat... the dog is just a pawn in the cats scheme
to take over the world
those damn inbreds from the south they are so tapped?
tapped? i don't know what that term means...
can't seem to get enough of you?
alright... how about you go and get me some stuff then?
there's a few cds i'd like...
it so hard to get used to someone elses bad habits when they move
in with you and even though you have lived with them a while its
well it comes down to just wanting to be able to do what we want
and since all people suck no matter who you move in with
will always do SOMETHING to piss you off
the days of my foolish youth, I used to throw things down the
stairs, sometimes even myself, simply to see what would happen
when they reach the bottom. Often times the things I lobbed would
smash themselves to pieces, myself being no exception. Now, as
a result, the only way I can stay together is through the magic
that is tape and staples.. but tape and staples only go so far.
My brain has never been the same, and I fear I am slowly going
insane.. just yesterday I found myself discussing my life story
with a waffle (a chocolate chip waffle, I might add), and much
to my suprise, after about an hour of somewhat one-sided conversation,
the waffle finally spoke. It told me that being a waffle isn't
all that it's cracked up to be, and that I shouldn't even compare
my miserable life with that of a lonesome waffle. I realized the
error of my ways and apologized to the waffle, and now it is my
friend. My question is this, DC the wise... am I going crazy?
Or is this waffle genuinely speaking to me?
you are going crazy but no more then needed as i too would throw
things down stairs to see them smash... and yes the waffle spoke
to you... those chocolate chip waffles are feisty
like to be a pepper, too?
hell no they piss me off
It's me your grandma Nanna! I miss you! Please come home! I love
you! I want to make you a fruitcake pie like old times.
fruitcake is sick... and i'm not home right now so maybe you should
go away for a few more years
no... but please leave and someone will be sure not
to get back to you
if it was
not me then why do i feel so dam guilty all the time i only wanted
to hurt him how did i know he had a dodgy heart, can you forgive
nope... not in the forgiving mood today... can i hurt you for
a little bit? that would amuse me for awhile
go for a wee it smells like sugarpuffs is this normal?
no its not normal to go around sniffing your own piss...
put it in jars and store them in your closet like the rest of
sock monkey a real person?
of course i'm a real sock monkey... didn't you see
my damn picture???
you call me anymore?
i don't like you anymore... you stopped rubbing my
are red and violets are blue, up is the opposite of down, the
moon isn't made of cheese and I can count to 342, what colour
pants am I wearing? Witto
you aren't wearing any pants... that's why you were
thrown off the bus this morning
you thimk? Or don't you think? Witto
i think when i'm paid to
used to turn to the bottle for entertainment. It was great for
awhile, getting tanked every damn day, but now that damn bottle
expects me to amuse myself with it every friggin' chance I get.
It's even gone as far as to dance a jig at my feet and sing me
a song to convince me to give it just another shot. This is getting
out of hand... should I give in and smash the f*** out of it,
or just continue on with this little charade until my liver starts
to go into spasms?
smash the fuck out of it and send in pictures of it's
the male seahorse carry the embryos? Witto
to annoy and confuse... i mean seahorses are just creepy
to begin with...
men encouraged to wear frilly bras and underwear? Or is it just
me who thinks this? Witto
it is just you who thinks it... i see encouragement
for that kind of behavior everywhere
what's the deal? What are they trying to prove?
i know it's just too happy the way they did it... but
we'll be doing our own version soon...
Can I have
a stinky butt monkey award please? Witto
anything smaller than a sand? How about a salt? Or a flour? Witto
i think that an atom is smaller... but i could be horribly
wrong causing the world to disappear
is infinity? Witto
an awful lot plus a bit more
would you go? Witto
depends on my state of mind and what i hope to achieve
to break a rule, so the cheque is in the post. Here comes the
gibberish bit. Hooby flooby strickle poop. Dunkey slosh fookin
mojotspant? Queueueuety ropinhaaz? Witto
fine but i better see it SOON... and i'm only letting
it through this once
you ever thought about starting a sock monkey training school?
If not why not? I'm sure there are lots of people out there who
would benefit enormously from gaining the ability to hold a fully
licensed and DC endorsed sock monkey. The course could entail
things like rudimentary feeding patterns for sock monkeys, television
viewing habits and an introduction to sock monkey hygiene, as
I understand this area in particular holds some confusion. You
could then introduve a more advanced course for multiple sock
monkey carers, helping society to become more tolerant of the
little fellas. Just a thought, but one I think has great potential.
that is a great idea and perhaps i will take on such a project
in the future when i have more funds available unless you would
like to donate some to me...
my cat turned into a teridactal and it goes 'ahhhhhh! ahhhhhh!
ahhhhhh!' really loud at me
you're cat is just blind and deaf so he screams until
someone picks him up to let him know that there are still people
if you come here for a few hours i'll show you some
that thing that makes noises at night and no matter
what you do you can't find it to smash it
with multiple personalites threatnes to kill himself, is it considered
a hostage situation? - Wolfram
well that all depends... you would have to speak to
each personality to determine if any of them actually want to
do you like better? me or me?
i prefer me all the way
again! Remember you used to love fruit cake smothered in mustard
and oil? What has happend to you? Kiki and Baba miss you. I see
you are still wearing the elf shoes I knitted for you when you
were just a boy. Won't you please come home?
i have never liked fruitcake and you are just one of
those imposter grannies who want to pinch my cheeks
sorry. I ate a milk carton. The ching chang man told me to play
the dictionary. can i eat now?
yes you may... but only another milk carton
my site become a link on your site?
you go to this form
and request a link... and if you want to give us money (for real)
ok so heres
the deal. i forgot to take my pills this moring and right now
i am feeling quite bad. but as i am in school i have no access
to my home. i could phone my mother but that would mean using
precious texting credit off my phone and i am really getting very
agitated and disturbed. joanna doesn'yt believe me when i say
i take them. is this disturbing and should i phone my mum??
yes you should... unless of course you will go insane and hide
all the toilet paper in the school... and i'd kick joanna's ass
if i were you
you get your funky elf shoes? -keglineq
my mother made them for me... there is a hat to go
with it too
tomahawk cd not out there yet?? cos it's out here mwhahahahahahahahaha
damnit... well i am trying to get to the one record
store that might have it and if i could find my damn credit card
then i could order it online... but sigh... and yes i know its
out there... i will obtain it!!! or you can send me your copy
anyway that i could send you a link to me and my friends site
but secretly so that joanna will never know??? -keglineq
yes... go to this form and
don't let joanna see you do it
laughs hysterically is it legal to hit them??
i think it's legal to slap them across the face a few
u do if orange juice starts coming out of ur nose?
get a glass and fill it up... then you've got some
orange juice to drink
poisoned the water hole, what should i do?
piss in it... that will show them all
is using my arm against me. they are swinging it to and fro and
hitting the desk, me and others wuth. she has just made me touch
the teachers bum and he is now looking at me strangely. should
i turn violently on joanna or not??
yes... i've already told you to kick her ass damnit!
homeless people smell of urine?
to keep those religious freaks away from them
a lemming, can we do anything to help this poor creature?
push her off a ledge
hoodie got ripped. What should I do?
freak out and take out a few houses
i was only informed later that BSB could
stand for back street boy and
in that case i think you should be shot for even coming
on this site with that kind of taste
Seattle!!! Do you ever think that would ever happen??
well i haven't touched seattle ... so don't blame me...
and i would never do that sort of thing
is too long for smiling inanely???????
forgetting to put my name after my questions. is this good or
for you it is bad... for me it is irrelevant... although
i do want to hurt joanna now
'keep it up' for long??
yes... and my tail even has a wire in it to keep it
stiff even longer
DC - ha ha ha - who are u kidding?
no one i know
this in a singles column: ' one sexy knee sock looking for 'sole'
mate with preferably less than 2 holes' are you interested? cause
i can fix you two up-the on hoo cnt spel
that sounds delightful... i am interested unless it's
some granny knee sock
If I stump
up 25% of the cash for the sock monkey training school would you
be willing to chip in too? What do you reckon the chances of gaining
sponsorship deals or gifts of money are? ( I'm not afraid to sell
my body either, if you can find someone who wants it that is....)
well we'd still have to find another 75%... i can chip in a few
pounds of kitty litter and flaming hoops to jump through... we
will sell Mzebonga's body and yours on the site...
Do I have
to ask a question? Oh wait, that Is a question.... Aha! Got it,
I'm going to make a statement. Thanks for the good question award,
it means a lot to me. I'm sure everyone remembers their first
one. I know I will. Witto
yes you do have to ask a question... and i always remember the
first one i got too
toaster has started to beat me. It started off with him being
generally abusive when he was drunk. Then one day he got home
and saw that the raw toast came in a packet labelled 'Bread'.
On seeing this he just went mad, throwing waffles, teacakes and
crumpets at me. Then one day he raised his.... flex... I'm sorry,
this is difficult to talk about... and he ......HIT me. Now it
is a regular thing, he'll go out, get tanked up on electrons,
come back and threaten to toast me, while beating me around the
head with his crumb tray. I'm at my wits end, I don't know what
to do. Or which way to turn. Can you help? Witto
i suggest that you unplug the little bitch and then beat it to
a pulp with a baseball bat... sometimes thats just the way things
need to be handled... have i mentioned that my friend has a girlfriend
who should be removed in such a manner??? and if she reads
this... then YES you stupid bitch i'm talking about YOU so DIE
fart, and smell it, and someone says 'The one who smelt it dealt
it', and you come back with: 'The one who said the rhyme comitted
the crime' he can retort with 'The one who denied it supplied
it' But what can you use to get out of that one? Witto
your fist repeatedly smashing into their face tends
to end the conversation
get arrested for molesting sock monkies? Witto
only if they don't like it or you don't pay them
americans call toilets John? Why not Derek, or Freda? Witto
there is a real story about this but i don't know it
and am too lazy to go find it... so i'll just say that some guy
named john made the whole thing up to feel special
do you charge for sexual favours? How much for an hours naked
jelly wrestling? Witto
depends on what you look like, how diseased you are
and how lazy i'm feeling... but if money is no object then i'm
all yours... i don't care much for jelly so i'll charge you 75
per hour including clean up time
americans wear big girly pads, helmets and body armour when playing
rugby and call it football? Rugby is a real mans sport. Not meaning
to offend anyone you understand.... Witto
rugby is far superior to american football... i mean those rugby
players look like they could kick over concrete buildings... but
i don't watch either sport because it doesn't appeal to me
I donate an insane story to your goodself? Witto
go to this form and request to be contacted about your
story... be sure to give us a bit of what its about or something...
be sure to put that you've mentioned it to me here cuz i'm not
always the one who answers these forms
Is it feasible
to make waterproof tea bags? Mine leak brown stuff when they get
mine did that until i dunked them in hot wax before
hand... let it cool... then you can float it in your tea... just
don't heat your tea up with the bag...
best way to milk a cow?
well i think tom green has found the most practical
way by just sucking on the cows teets
my girlfriend walk all over me?
if you wouldn't lay on the floor and bitch about the
ceiling then she wouldn't
anything bigger than a kabilmiltrimibuxhectilfrunkilbillion ?
yes, but only by an inch
the toy story, if buzz lightyear tyhinks he is the real thing
y does he always lay down and shut up when eva that little boy
comes into the room ? ? *G*
everything in that movie is a horrible lie and its
wrong that we were lied to like that...
y do sprouts
taste so nice ? ? *G*
its the sugar
what is my name
holar from the planet Krisme
y do u
always wear odd colour shoes ?
those are the only shoes i have
y is john
on a popstars website ? ? *G*
i have no idea... but then again i have no idea what
john you're talking about
why r clouds
white? ? *G*
they're not... what the hell is wrong with you?
u r talkin about the creature mouse do u say mice, but when u
r talkin about a computer mouse do u say mouses? ? *G*
no... you say mice and if they don't work then they
are called stupid pieces of shit
joanna sound really mean. she's not really that bad. she just
controls my arm too much. what way should i kick her ass?? -keglineq
i would take your arm back and beat her with it....
then rip off your leg and boot her with it a few times
you do if i told you that i don't like mike patton or faith no
more and that i would never ever send you the tomahawk cd? -keglineq
i would say 'ok' and carry on with my life... i certainly don't
expect everyone to have the same taste as me... however you should
buy the cd for me because i'm so tolerant
witto ask dumbass questions ? ? *G*
why does anything really happen? that's right... for
no reason at all
have HMV? -keglineq
i don't personally own one but there are those that
do near me
mum make me elf shoes?? -keglineq
i'm sure she could... but she won't
were put in the washing machine would you die? -keglineq
well if you never let me out then yes i would die
phone my mum yesterday so i went rampant and locked the toilets
so ppl couldn't go all day ha ha. did i do good?? -keglineq
yes you did wonderfully... now onto step 2 of the plan...
a few questions
in one!. 1. y do u wear lipstick ? 2. whats with the big gloves
? 3. and....r u gay ? ? by.. j.rennocks
1. not usually 2. keep my fingers warm
3. only if you're offering to come over and fuck me
Is it likely
we're gonna kick Bin Ladens ass all over the world? Then move
on to the Israel/Palestine and the Northern Ireland conflict?
i say we take out ALL the humans... then everything will be just
what everyone wants, only pay their workers a measly 2.50 an hour?
i blame the increase in feather use
u spell 40 as forty and not fourty ? ? i mean y wud u take out
the 'u' its stupid ? ? *G*
that is the reason... cuz it's stupid
DC, r u
an elf ? ? no ? ? then y r u wearing little tiny red and green
elf shoes on for ? ? *G*
my mom made them for me and they keep my feet warm...
don't make me kick your ass in them too
y in tennis
do they score the points as 15, 30, 40, then won, ? ? *G*
i wasn't aware they did the scoring like that... sounds
y do babboons
look the same from both ends ? *G*
to confuse and delight each other and you
I am Joanna.
Should I plot sweet revenge on keglineq now??? And she touched
Mr Booths ass off her own accord!!
videotape any revenge you bestow on keglineq and i'll be happy
heres the deal. every lunch time me and my friends end up getting
covered in cream. this is beacuse the school sells these little
cream filled donut things and everytime one of my wee group of
friends tries to eat one another person wil shove the donut in
their face (once i got blackcurrent all over my face and neck
but that was really quite fun cos it looked like i was bleeding
to death and i used it to my advantage) it is my aim to have more
harmful substances but into these cream filled goodies but no
one else agrees with my views. is there any way that i could do
this without getting found out and then getting done for possible
well i'd have to way more details then i'm willing
to listen to about where these items are made... so instead i
say you just do it and accept the consequences
stephen such a plank?
so people can walk on him
is on fire! My penis is on fire!
piss it out
you like Fur? I do. Fur is cool. Will you buy me a fur coat?
no i don't like fur unless its on a living animal or
some roadkill... or bits of it on my tires... and no fur coats
I becoming addicted to asking you insane questions, then feverishly
waiting for the replies? Witto
cuz you're insane and i'm encouraging you to do so