see dead propcycles - Fido Dido
i got your
smoke signals, but i dont really think that eating all the yum-yum
monsters will really bring us closer to mars, but maybe if i get
a little drunk, i could dance it for you - Fido Dido
yum yum monsters are yummy and mars sounds fun so go
ahead and dance
eat tae tae tae? - Fido Dido
hsoeka flaieja oales
sez: Save the country! Do your part! Go to the mall! Spend money
on crap you don't need! Support the economy! Hand over your cash!
Shop-shop-shop! Hurry! America needs you! We can do it!
Malls and shopping centers: the temples of our culture. Apparently
this is where we go to "pray" for a better tomorrow.
I'm staying home. Meanwhile, the FBI has been saying all
along that more attacks are imminent...and finally, just recently,
Shrub manages to admit that yes, we are still in danger and that
shopping may not fix everything after all. A revelation!
I used to have shrubs in front of my bedroom window. The problem
was, it was far too easy to see through them... - Fido Dido
yea we will take anyones cash... and where is your
question??? that's it... 40 lashes to your bare ass with a bamboo
<B>does this thing accept html?</B> - Fido Dido </html>
what is this html you speak of?
right when people like maddonna are naked its cool?
i don't mind
didn't invite me to the party?
i did... but you're so STUPID
a rainbow makes you gay or for gay pride, and wearing a pink ribbon
makes you for breast cancer provention, then what does it mean
if you wear white shoes after labor day??
wearing a rainbow makes you gay? i never knew it worked
like that... and why wouldn't you wear white shoes after labor
day? i think that you are just making shit up to try to impress
ever find love again
who said you had it in the first place
WAY you find it? IN THE WAY? When it falls... When it falls to
the beach. yes. YES!!!! AND A GIGAFLOP???? The time for me. Yes.
Here is one question: Why did Edgar "Eddie Spaghetti"
Allen Poe touch dead people in their private holes? Thank you
for your time, and your most gracious service as regards this
matter. Dr. Phinnaeus Turpentine, Phd
maybe he hid his favorite gum there and didn't want
anyone stealing it so he hid it
Is it possible
to make a phone out of cabbage? or a house? I thinking about creating
a line of clothes made out of cabage what do you think?
yes and yes... and i think it's a great idea... let
me know when it's up so i can get some clothes... can i have a
sock monkey discount?
means a facial distortion why did McDonalds name that fat purple
i have no idea... maybe you should email them and ask...
then let us know... maybe they're making fun of fat purple blobs...
like all fat blobs are unhappy unless they're eating...
why i didn't say anything when he started greasing her up? well,
at first, it was just a back massage. who cares about a little
lotion or whatever the fuck he was using. i was just a bit suspicious
of his intent, but i figured he wouldn't be stupid enough to actually
try anything. as soon as he started greasing her up real high
on her thighs, i got pissed. i stood up over him and said "i
thought she just said a back massage." he said "no,
no i'm mumble mumble." so i went out in the driveway to my
car, got my knife, came back in, went to him, and you know the
rest. what would you have done had this situation happened to
i'd steal their money and leave... then take that money and buy
some chips and eat them... then drive around for a bit swearing
at people on the street... then go to a public bathroom and shit
out the chips... then get a plastic bag and gather up the chip
shit... then drive back and rub it in their faces... oh
and why did she let this happen? i would escape this trailer-trash
group of people and find some people with brains... and for those
living in trailers all offened by my words... well then of course
i'm not referring to you... just your neighbors
its when you don't look good as either a female or
i did ask
a question, but you just have to find it.... why?¿hym - Fido Dido
you know... no one is impressed with your stupid little
upside down question marks... i mean we can ALL do that and if
you think you're special or something well you're not.... so uh...
how'd you do that?
ok ok ok
I got it together realy i do ok ok yeah owow wow yeah um. ok see
i was just wounderin if u could give me some advice help me out
here .yeah well i have problems mit not be any that u can help
me out with but .i have dreams about gettin raped by guys dressed
up like clowns and axe murders i need help cuzz i cant have normal
sex with me boyfreind unless i think of him being in a clown suit
and even some times being michael myers .i need help 4 real dont
wanna become a spasmolytic with cycosamatics and end up in a mental
ward cmon can u tell me what i should do about it .thanks
well it sounds like you don't have a problem at all...
you have dreams and you have fantasies while having sex... i personally
think that the matter of your spelling should be addressed...
or buy your boyfriend a clown mask or something... he might be
into it... or get yourself a clown
cats are going to conquer the planet... and it seems my cat always
steals my socks and hides them in the basement. i found a stash
of 10 pairs of socks that he stole. What he hell is he trying
to do... should I be precautious?, what kind of matermind plan
is he working on right now?
yes they are and if i were you i'd put those socks back and pretend
you saw nothing... just leave that area alone and buy more socks...
just do what i say and you won't get hurt... if it's not too late
first the chicken or the egg and how did it get there ? ? ?
egg? this is the first i've heard of any eggs
i find aus rotten lyrics, dammit?!
on that website with the stupid ad banner that flashes
seem to like the good books (Asimov,King,etc.), and you have a
few(100?), but you seem to have missed William Gibson(Count Zero,Burning
Chrome, etc.), so get with it, you need to refine your insanity
to a razor-sharp, sarcasmo-the-clown edge....
i have about 400 books... and i haven't heard of that writer but
i'll be looking into it now... i've been running out of things
to read lately... and if you're into clowns or you are a clown...
there is someone i'd like you to meet...
know who Eddie Izzard is? - Mzebonga
no... and i've even looked his name up... so he's uh...
live without it?
usually but sometimes it's not by choice and damnit
then it just sucks but the worst is when you are getting it but
don't want it from where it's coming from
at first, the chicken or the Egg?
egg? this is the second i've heard of any eggs
i am afraid. the worms..... the worms! eat eat eat, they chant,
and chant and chant, all day long.... meep? - Fido Dido
worms like to grab people and drag them into the earth to feast
on body... that is where all the missing people go
is it true?
- Fido Dido
mostly yes... but sometimes no
be honest... who HASN'T dreamed of living in the bowels of a fish?
- Fido Dido
only those sick and twisted people who would rather
caress the bowels with their tongues... licking at them... tasting
them... getting turned on by them... getting naked... up against
them... rubbing... rubbing...
suck on my toes? -Empriss
hell no toes are just sick
my breasts enlarge?! WHEN?! I NEED TO KNOW!
try hitting them with something... swelling should help you out
we park in a drive way, and drive in a park way
what's this WE stuff about.. you're the only one doing that shit....
a girl i realy like and i dont no what to say to her and we have
been freinds for a very long time what should i say to her
how did you stay friends this long without speaking? just
tell her... what's the worst she could do... rip off your dick,
mince it up, force you to eat it, then kill you slowly though
years of marriage and children? ugh... that IS pretty bad...
but most chicks aren't like that... and if they are... there's
warning signs to let you know
tallest a midjet can be until he is not a midjet any more
i would guess that anything under 3 feet would quality as midget
size, for humans anyways... but i don't really know
people can fit into heaven until it gets to full and creates a
fire hazord ? ?
well about the same amount that can fit into an imagined
cube... maybe a bit less...
they called goldfish if they are orange?
the gold fish used to taunt the drunken pirates who
would look into the water, think it was gold and try to dive in
to get it... gold moves fast in the water...
the scary Schwans man keep coming to my house late at night? Why
do we always end up with frozen peas in our freezer? IM SCARED!
when you leave rotting baskets of meat under your bed,
then of course the schwans will show up... and the peas are there
as a decoy... toss them aside and you'll discover the TRUE way
feel that the orange fluff underneither the beds in dorm rooms,
is a direct result of unwanted roomates?
short answer yes, long answer no with a but...
skanks eat for breakfast?
little whiny chumps
my cat always watching CNN when i get home?
your cat is an intelligent blood-thirsty creature...
it's either CNN or your face with a cat like yours
is a transvestite comedian who is greatly inspired by Billy Conolly.
He did a gig in San Fransisco many years back and has had a few
film appearances in the Avengers, Mystery Men, Circus and Velvet
Goldmine. All his movie appearances were pretty poor, but in terms
of stand-up, Seinfeld makes him look like a God (because Seinfeld
is wholely the most poor stand-up comedian ever) and he is probably
one of the best ones I've ever seen. Do you consider yourself
educated now? - Mzebonga
i was educated before this, but now i feel that something important
has been pushed aside to be replaced with this new information...
but at least now i can say i know who he is
the question: "which came first the chicken or the Egg?"
I think the answer is the chicken, because capital letters weren't
invented for many years after the creation of language. Am I right?
you having holidays?
holidays? i had forgotten about those... hmmmmm
If I want
it badly enough will I get it?
probably not... but if you try hard enough, you can
trick your mind into BELIEVING you have it... and hey, that's
just as good
set me free?
sure but i'd like you to clean the place up a bit before
Can I have
the last one?
a good day?
i was asleep for most of it so yes it was
you be unhappy if I did this to you?
mmm... actually that felt pretty good... try it again...
but do it longer
So i thought
life was like a bubble bath was I wrong? I like bubble baths and
can I blow some bubbles at you?
yes you were wrong and sure but don't get it in my
are the photos to the school year stuff coming ?
haha... soon i guess... maybe in the next month and
we'll let you know
around the house tonite. the roc is a myhtical bird. do the carrots
ride away in my car at night? i dont have a car. eat eat eat eat
eat, thats all they chant, day and night, in and out, upside and
the rigth way up. but supposing we DO do the okey-kokey AND turn
around, is that what it's REALLY all about? or is there something
more? run around, run around, paint the children purple. eat eat
eat. ding-dong avon lady. with a hey noddy noddy? ¿eat tae? -
it's the carrots on the weekends, the celery on the weekdays...
and yes you but they have it all the time so you didn't notice.
that's ALL it's about if you believe in the existence of the hokey
pokey or not... ¿¿¿¿¿¿...
I? - Fido Dido
I? - Fido Dido
i don't think you should do either
a good reason why I should give a rat's ass?
i can't think of any reason... but then of course i
just pretended to think about it cuz i couldn't give a rats ass...
i'm fresh out
Tony Millionaire, or merely a coincidence?
millionaire? i'm awake! what? oh no... whoever that
it... damnit i thought i was getting some money...
where can i buy
a sock monkey tee-shirt, please help!!!!!! Many thanks
well i'm sorry i don't know right now...
we're looking into making some but because of the whole wanting
money thing these tshirt people want it's kinda on the back burner
that person in the wheelin and dealin picture?
i'm not sure exactly... some people that worked at
the bar we were at i think
come "people" say christopher columbus discovered america
if when he got here there was alrdy people here? ? ? ?.......thats
like me coming to your back yard kicking u out and then telling
every body look at the new land i found.
because people are stupid... have i told you i found some land
the other day? i was just out walking and suddenly there
it was so i planted my flag on it and did a little dance...
i find chocolate covered babys ?
at the local chocolate/candy store i would suspect
humans taste like i hear they taste like chicken....how come when
ever some one dont no what something taste like they say it taste
i'm a vegetarian but if given the chance i would eat human...
with that aside, people say that because they are stupid and are
obsessed with things that taste like chicken
am I? - Mzebonga
about as cold as the crotch of a frozen dead penguin...
and just as purdy too...
teachers dress up? why don't students dress up and the teachers
dress down? IM CONFUSED LIKE A FAT BITCH ON A STICK
its some sort of job thing that we wouldn't understand... and
because that would suck... a fat bitch on a stick? they're selling
the older kids kick me in the stomach and call me Nancy?
that's what the sign on your back says you want done
to you.... nancy
make me a happy woman and go out with me so I can FINALLY have
an online companion?
that depends on where we're going and how much money
you'll be paying me
dont know anymore????? am i? any one who says "quiet as a
church mouse" has never stepped on one - Fido Dido ps ¿eat
all i do is look for mice but it doesn't give me the attention
i wanted... what do i have to do to get noticed? it's just
something i do and they squeal and squeal and all the people in
the church tell me to put my pants back on and then they throw
things at m so no they probably haven't stepped on on... or tried
to sit on one...
you just bite me?! i never liked you anyway and i hope you fall
off a cliff and die, one less piece of shit around to make my
ok... bring it on over and i'll take a nice chunk out
a sock monkey?
of course... didn't you see my picture?
you need to turn you on?
some gloves, ropes, a prodding stick, colored beads
and plenty of dirty talk
let a soulmate pass you by?
i already have... but the game was on so i couldn't
do anything about it
u a bitch
coffee make the office people work? what would happen if all the
coffee in the world disappeared? would everything stop? - Fido
yes and if that happened i would have to kill everyone
and ground up your dehydrated bodies and put that through my coffee
maker instead and if that didn't give me the kick that my coffee
does... well then i'll kill myself
what'd be cool? - Fido Dido
if someone decided to pay me to do this site, as well
as give me enough money to open up and run my own theinsanedomain
store, hire me a maid to cook/clean/massage/do laundry/bring me
coffee, pay me to write insane books and uh... oh and maybe some
extra cash every month so i can buy cds
think would be cool would be a)for that forum to be up soon(!)
and b) you had an option for the question to have a little icon
with it, from a choice of your best ones (like the monkey head)
- Fido Dido
a) damn straight b) you people should be fucking happy to get
any kind of award at all and if you don't like it then you can
lick the monkey ass
So do like
Shirly Mansons song androgyny ?I like it
i don't think it's just her song... i'm pretty sure
there were others involved... and i don't recall what it sounds
is the difference between jelly and jam ??
only one feels good on my ass
the chicken cross the road?
you have no tangible proof that the said chicken actually
crossed this 'road' and those who have claimed to see it have
some 'issues' to begin with due to their anti-society view of
reality and their unwillingness to just do what they're told and
besides we all know the road doesn't exist and never has
rule the world after humans die off?
you must be new here... the CATS
have sex with me?
aha! better! "and the great prophet said "lo, ¡d33w"......and
the multitude spake thus: "lo, see, the great prophet spakest
nonsense"......and the great prophet beat them with his stick
spaking "KILL THE PURPLE TREES!!", whereupon the they
did.....twits..." - Fido Dido oh yeah, question, erm....
can anyone actually THROW rhymes? exactly... and once you
realize that this shit ain't what they sold us then you can truly
see that origami about about bending your mind and thoughts...
the paper is just a physical representation of your inner self
as you go through the 'folds' of life and no matter what you do,
it always looks like some fucking bird
- Fido Dido | | | kill? | | | graj? | | | insanity | | |
or just surreal? is there a difference? - Fido Dido
this little story should answer your question... there
was a little store in a downtown location that spent hours and
hours on their window displays. people would come from all
around to see these window displays and it won them many awards.
by capturing the publics attention, the company prospered and
decided to open another store. this time they decided not
to spend so much time creating window displays. the second
store was leveled in a fire, and their half-assed window displays
were gone forever.
I gonna get some? -Mzebonga
here ya go
ever like me, serisouly?
no and i'm just making this shit up as i go sometimes...
quite frankly i think alex likes me and is just using you to get
the effects of gamma rays on man in the moon marigolds?
well all the tests haven't been completed and analyzed
yet but it seems that balding and growth of horns are the common
effects... in rare cases (so far) an increase in disco dancing
has been noted
do that just to get my attention?
damn straight i did
no... i'm not that coordinated
we want things we can't have?
well we don't have them, so we want them... then once
we have them, we don't want them anymore
is that a picture of in the strange people section of photos with
their face covered with their hand and the pictures caption is
i'm not exactly sure but it might be ver
know that you're wrong about cats taking over the planet? As a
matter a fact...its the worms...You know after it's rained and
the worms come out on the path, and they try and get you to stand
on them? Those are the worms that have been naughty, it's their
punishment don't ya know. And when you walk along the path, they're
following you...through the mud underneath. Listen to me, and
be warned! -Who?
do you honestly think that the worms haven't been allied with
by the cats? in a secret report that surfaced in the 1970's,
a clear connection between the worms and the cats was revealed....
since then the worms have been digging tunnels under all the cities
for the cats to begin training their forces...
eat eat, will they ever shut up? - Fido Dido
no they won't until you kill them all
all the new questions really stink? I mean, it just isn't what
it use to be. Remember the time when someone asked:"Hey DC,
why does soap feel so good on my tushy, but really really bad
in my mouth?" Remember what you said??? Remember? I don't.
i don't remember but i'm sure it was quite amusing for you...
perhaps you should send me money to show me how much you enjoy
all my answers... and there have been lots of questions... just
none that have screamed out for an award
that guy who steals my car every time that stupid light
shines in the sky
had to be bitten anywhere, where you would choose to be bitten?
on the neck cuz it doesn't feel so painful there...
more of a painful pleasure
strangest foods you've eaten together?
peanut butter and pickles
could be any cartoon character, who would you be?
if i decided
to tie u up & do anughty things to your body would that b
ok with you?
sounds like a fun time... will you
be providing the rope or will i?
ever upt your fist through a wall?
yes i have but not in some drunken-jock way
from your childhood do you still secretly like?
had the choice of having to eat your whole family with bacon or
having your skin peeled off slowly, which you would enjoy the
most and why
i don't eat bacon (although i would try human) however,
i seem to like torturing myself slowly so i'll chose the skin
you think you can give out advice to others when you obviously
have no life of your own?
well i don't see anyone asking you questions... and
sitting in your apartment whacking off to Cat Fancy isn't exactly
called having a life either
are your socks right now?
one of them is black, the other is grey
A Naked gnome! _Dibbley
where?! where?!?! hey... you tricked me! dibbley...
are you related to dwane dibbley??
Can I sell
my roommate on eBay? I need the money...
i don't see a problem... but you may want to instead
do all the things on our roommate
hell list and tape it to sell to some stupid tv station for
were a Republican, would He downsize Heaven to improve His bottom
i have no idea... but if it were me i'd be poisoning
the air with some sort of agent to make all the employees sterile
YOU!!!!! NEVER!!!! HAHAHA Why would anyone pay you for anything
? Only because sometimes your a smooth talker.
yea... you know you wanna pay me... go on... whip out
that credit card... oh yea... like that... i'm a fucking dirty
whore... oh yea... pay me to be bad... i'll let you touch my tail...
got a nice piece of ass?
i did but then i lost it and now i have to find myself
you know everyone wants you ,your totally appealing ,I don't know
why but everyone wants wants you.Do you know why?
yea i know what you all want me for you horrid people... you want
me to perform tricks with my tail for your kids... well forget
that shit and i don't care how many sock monkey treats you give
me i'm not jumping through that flaming hoop... unless you have
a credit card...
to say this but pickles are awful and make me puke?
pickles rock and if you don't like them, then buy a
whole bunch of them and send them to me
my neutered dog love to be jerked off by me but yet will not even
lick my cunt? I am very clean and would really LOVE to be licked
by him or have his BIG cock throbbing inside me.
you're probably only good for hand jobs and he's got
some prettier bitch on the side that's for fucking
francais very well. ¿eat tae? NO! shut up! stop the voices! crush
their heads and lick out the brains! does my bum look big in this?
- Fido Dido ps trousers
damn french people should learn to drive! the voices are what
keep me warm and secure at night... they tell me to hurt myself
and make sandwiches... and uh... your butt? uh... well it looks...
i'll answer your question DC. and the answer is: "damn straight"
- Fido Dido
i applaud you
not learning, 1939 returning. hows that for a poltical message?
- Fido Dido
i personally like "cheese on sticks" better
paul ate my foot? why does he always eat my feet? i tell him not
to, but he just goes and does it anyway? - Fido Dido
i don't know... i personally would never put anyones foot in my
mouth except my own... but ever since i pulled that muscle i can't
do that either... try wearing mirror socks... it will frighten
0 degrees today, and it's going to be twice as cold tomorrow,
...how cold will it be? If you had a million Shakespeare's, would
they write like a monkey? Do you need a silencer if you are going
to shoot a mime? - Fido Dido
it will be twice as cold... and i think so... and yes
worms are in on it? Any news on the ducks? How about the ants?
How stands things on the invasion front? - Mzebonga
the worms are in on it... the ducks have always been in on it...
the ants have a peace treaty and information on the invasion front
is classified... instead, play with this shiny ball of tinfoil
wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?
Please. Help me. I'm totally lost....SAVE MY SOUL, YOU PIECE OF
well if a woodchuck could chuck would, could he chuck
wood all day long or only on the weekends? once we've determined
how much time he could spend towards chucking wood, then evaluate
his workflow and determine if anything can be done to improve
his efficiency... perhaps upgrade his technology, improve customer
relations or even get some upgrading training. once we have done
that then we can begin recording how much wood the woodchuck is
chucking to work out an average number of how much wood the woodchuck
is chucking if he could chuck wood
aunt told me to not ask for anal sex from a friend's friends.
Why is this?
perhaps she wants the anal sex all for herself... or
maybe your aunt is offended that you didn't ask her to put on
a large strap on and give you anal sex
I ever get the "oh so grand 'good question award'"?
What is wrong with me?! Can you just put the little green monster
friend next to my question so I will be content? I love you...I'll
be your best friend...
you have issues that quite frankly prevent you from
getting a good question award both her and in your real life...
but don't worry, some day you might figure it out and then you'll
get all the awards you can handle... and if you love me then you'll
clean my place and make me some food... oh yea and touch my tail
Cats such a sucess on Broadway?
it was probably due to those delightful little costumes
that make you want to go touch all their tails
grocerie store seems to have stopped carrying Betty Crocker Instant
Powdered Femail Dominatrix Mix. Can I have some of yours? Tell
them i dont want to go back. I'm frightened. AAAHHHHHHH!!!
hell no it's mine... get your own you little frightened person
who doesn't have any mix
six Joker's Cards are revealed and the wagons of the Dark Carnival
come, will you be transported to Shangri La or the Echoside?
the last time i did it i was taken to echoside but that guy with
the hat said that from now i wasn't supposed to go there and if
i did then 'bad things would happen' and even though i got a nice
tshirt, i must say i was hurt
I have a friend
who likes to sautee marijuana in butter and eat it with chips.
What's wrong with him? How can i correct this foolish behavior?
i know... why does he do all that WORK?!? just smoke it and shut
I build a spaceship out of two bags of barbecue potatoe chips
and rabbit shit?? I need to know right away. This is urgent! The
fate of mankind rests in the ballance!!!
if i knew how to do that, i'd be off this planet of stupidity...
nothing can save mankind
Oh my God!
It's stuck to my head! Why aren't you listening to me? stop poking
me with that thing. SHUT UP! AHHHHHHH!!! Kill. Kill. Kill. What's
that funny smell? Oooooh, nachos! Hooray for Wienerdogs! Why?
what? i wasn't listening
the record for the most eggs shoved in one butthole?
i have no idea... but i'm assuming that they'd have
to be hard boiled eggs... and i would guess at maybe 2 or 3...
when you finally get that record, you let us know how many you
it's on of those genetic creatures that scientists
are playing with... they got some of dole's dna and a termites
my friends girlfriend
my friend are having an argument. I say God lives in Equador but
he says God lives in Hondures. Can you solve this debate for us?
yes, you're both wrong and very stupid so send all your money
to me now
Look! I'm running rampant. Weeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!!!!
............ OW!!! Who put that lamppost there? - Mzebonga
i know... what's it doing here in the wardrobe? where are
Help!! My new owner is evil. I'm being mistreated!!! They don't
even beat me!!! Will you buy me back? Please!!! - Mzebonga
they don't beat you?! i'm outraged... that was in the contract
that you are to receive at the LEAST, weekly beatings... we'll
find you a new owner
that you have my attention what did you want?
money, pleasure, maybe a few cds
think you looked hard enough to find it?
i only look until i find it or until i've forgotten
what it is i'm looking for
ever give anyone a compliment?
sometimes... but not a whole lot
a glimmer of hope...........at all?
not really... its just your eyes playing tricks on
have anyone you admire or look up to in your life?
sure i do
Do I have
well the more money you have, the better the chance
most prized possesion?
my brain but if you're talking more of an object then
my laptop cuz it has all my stuff on it
your favourite person who asks questions here?
well many people don't put their names... so out of
those that do i'd have to say i hate you all and always have...
biased in some situations?
i would have to say yes
if you smoke the wacky weed then maybe your not a sock monkey
you just think you are?
that could be true... but if thats not my tail i'm
touching then why does it feel so good?
committed be fun?
i guess if you find that sort of thing fun then yes...
i think it would be fun to be in one of those jackets for awhile...
just so i could struggle in a futile manner while screaming
So is passing
judgement a good thing?
depends on if you have gotten my approval or not beforehand
most most creative thing you can do with some rope?
somehow turn it into the medical solution for stupidity
were to be stuck on an island with 3 people and 3 objects what
would they be?
jcp, mike patton and someone who is trained in making
shelter/finding food/survival and medically trained to keep us
alive, my laptop, my pillow and lots of drugs (recreational and
a sock monkey suck ass sometimes?
yes it does... especially when children pull on your
the best questions on your page?
hmmm... thats tough since there quite a few of you
that obviously have issues but don't sign your name for fear the
government will hunt you down and force you to make phone commercials...
i can't select just one... but the top are Mzebonga, fido dido,
empress nikon and sally... oh and gone postal
thing you can't live without?
Who is the driving
force in your life?
i am... who the hell else would be?
just because i'm kept in a cage in jcp's garage and only brought
out to be whipped and forced to answer these questions doesn't
mean i'm not in control of my own life
ever just going to shut the hell up and let me speak?
not likely... i did that once and it sucked
sometimes wish you were somewhere else and where would that be?
i always wish to be taken far far away from this planet
to some other planet where all the inhabitants do what i say and
i'd like to hand pick all the humans that would get brought along
with me... i'd hold auditions...
well i did but i got an email from someone telling
me that i could have a larger penis in 4 days so i'm focusing
all my funds on that instead
to get to first base or all the way?
depends on how old you are, your relation to me and
how drunk you are...
a playmate will you be it?
sure, but don't pull on my tail... do it nicely...
that's right... isn't that fun?
favourite board game?
like to swim?
yes i love swimming and i want a pool
Can I get
to know you better?
sure but how about you buy me some stuff first?
I think your just the best thing since sliced bread?
well that's very nice of you... here... you can play
with my tail since you're so nice
odd reason you have some fluff coming out of your head???
what? oh... i'll just jam it back in there... there...
sometimes... i'm not a big fan of it... unless it's
everything is faith no more?
there's no reason why it shouldn't be
they build dams and have sharp teeth... they plan to
flood the land so all the humans will die but they aren't organized
well enough to actually do it
Go on admit
I'm sexy and we belong together because we are both sexy ?
ok i'll go along with that... so you gonna touch my
when wasn't i?
do the macerena or any other stupid dance like that?
no and i refuse to try... even if i did i'm not that
you the most popular one?
i have the biggest tail and a trusting face
could choose one of your question askers here to meet who would
it be and why?
i would meet empriss nikon so i could kick her sorry
ass (yea you heard me)
any good at telling jokes and remembering the punch line?
i'm more of a situational humor person... or just random
insanity... no one else ever seems to laugh WITH me...
hate give and take?
depends on what it is... i've fallen for that before
owny 10 dollar??
sure, i'll take 10 for it... go ahead
If I gave
you a blow job would you be happy with that?
sure... if you could make me some food before you leave
that would make me even happier
you want other peoples bodily fluids at all?
to keep in jars to impress your friends and family
then eventually sell it to someone as 'art'
you do on a fun day out if I paid?
i'd buy lots of stuff that i wanted online with your
credit card... then i'd want to go to a cool concert at night
and then perhaps roam the streets for awhile all fucked up and
you'd have to buy me lots of coffee the whole time too... oh and
ana wants some new toys
the best siteseeing spots in canada?
well i haven't seen very much of canada YET but i personally
like ottawa the best... toronto is ok but only if you want to
see over a million pissed off people who are pretending that no
one else around... sometimes that hostility is fun
would do it, only if you pay ME?
fine but i've only got 10 bucks and i need 8 of it
how you say lie ,lie and deny I had anything to do with it well
it worked , my husband blames me for it all so I said it was the
maid and then he beleived me because I lied and said I didn't
do It ,I had nothing to do with it , it wasnt me ever, it was
the maid.She chucked out the shaving cream I know it.So he said
okay and fired her hehe that was a funny story so the lie always
works doesn't it?
sometimes the lies work and when they don't, you better have a
sharp object around to do what needs to be done
I'm so precious I think I might break into a million pieces?
well that's just too bad...
but they took my credit card away and wont give me another?
then what good are you now? unless you have lots
of cds you'd like to send me
want all you do is want?
mostly yes... sometimes i have to give though... sigh
well there's been no camping lately... sadly enough..
unless you want to go but we'll have to share a tent and sleeping
If a tree
fell in the middle of the woods, and killed a mime, would anybody
only enough to poke at the dead body with a stick and
consider murder a good or bad thing?
depends on the situation really... in most cases i
would consider it a mercy killing
could you solve a little porblem of mine? how can i solve 1+1=___?
i thought, maybe figureing out the transambuperlation of the pseudo
cosmic anti-matter, then using the interquartile hypoteneuse of
the third law of thermodynamics, but my friend just says that
1+1=2. how do i do it? - Fido Dido
you don't... you see you have realize that the numbers
are only there to confuse and distract you from the TRUTH
dial again please. 8787878390394958. is this right? george bush
speaking. no, today is tuesday. not here, but maybe, somewhere
else.... the moon insulted me. - Fido Dido is there a cure?
yes and there is no cure yet besides death
<me> ------> Hard place /^^\- Fido Dido
i know there's no question here but damnit he's rockin
out and you gotta respect that sometimes
"Look ma no hands!" Larry says, "Look ma no feet!"
*thud* Larry says, "Wook ma mo teef!" What is you thought
on this?? - keglineq
i personally find larry to be an annoying and unneeded presence
here on the site... i will now go on and pretend like it never
happened... but deep down inside i know it did
i'm having amnesia and deja vu at the same time. I think i've
forgotten this before. Which is better, deja vu or amnesia?
well if it's something good then i'll go with deja vu... if its
something really shitty then i go for amnesia all the way
u think of the band cradle of filth
well i know that schizoid thinks they rock, and i know
i've heard it, i just don't recall it at all
a berry or a rock?
ping. sing a pig to broadway. hmmm? - Fido Dido
that's it fido dido... there is no way that you are
a functioning member of society so you're either another sock
monkey or you're locked up somewhere and get time to take off
the straightjacket to log in here... i'm hoping it's the second
and you can send me one of those jackets... have i mentioned i'd
like to just struggle on my floor for a few hours in a futile
attempt to escape? that's some damn good fun
girl like me?
probably not but if you pretend not to care then she
how can u get
a girl you really like
duct tape, chloroform and a sack...
then take her somewhere to 'just talk'
got better healing powers, custard or lima beans???
lima beans... and they slip so well into all those
little holes you humans have
- Fido Dido
Golden Girls the sexiest women on TV or what?
i'm going to have to go with 'what'... although making
that sophia scream my name over and over might be alright for
awhile... until i snapped her spine but hey that happens sometimes
how long does
it take to make a sock monkey?
i'd ask my mother but frankly i don't
want to hear that story
sock monkeys have feelings
yes we're a very sensitive species... and if you want
you and i can talk about our feelings some more... maybe you can
stroke my tail for awhile too
do u spit
depends on what you're paying me
do u have
any tattos and if u do what do u have and where
damnit people shut up.... i can't get a tattoo because
i'm allergic to the damn alcohol in the ink and on all the instruments...
if i was able to get one i would have many and they would be black
the answer is 42. (no, this isn't some silly math thingy) I just
dont know the question. It's just life, the universe, everything
- you know? Twice I've seen it proved that that is the answer
- and still no one knows the question it's supposed to answer.
So, I'm asking if you know the question to the ultimate answer.
I thought it had something to do with frogs, but may be way off
here. Do you know the question? -Power Nibbler
the damn white mice won't tell me the question because
they claim it would 'be leaked online and spoil the ending'
more info on the invasion DC. I knew about the ants, thanks for
the worm info - but I'm worried about the frogs. As tadpoles they
seem pretty cool, but, you know? - Power Nibbler
don't even LOOK at the frogs... pretend they aren't there... and
information on the invasion is classified
tent and a sleeping bag ............ with you.......... I don't
think so , sometimes if I ignore you will you go away?
yes i will... but only after about an hour of annoying sounds
and things being thrown at you to make you admit that you can't
do you want to kick empriss nikons ass for?
why? so i can KICK HER ASS! that's all the reason
i need... that and it would be quite fun
I think you need to get out more?
i think that sometimes too but then the voices tell
me that if i go outside bad things will happen and i will meet
people who will just hurt me in the end and maybe i'll never come
back again which is ok but what if everything that can possibly
go wrong goes wrong and then it ruins my world forever all because
i went outside and so it's much better to just hide under the
bed and tremble while the voices scream for an end to it all
i have NO idea what is considered canadain food
sometimes you just need to be an airhead?
sometimes its all that is required of you... like at
your a barrel of laughs other times your not funny at all?
yea it comes and goes... i figure that as long as i'm
amused then it's ok... unless you pay me to amuse you
pay to be patient?
not really... but even if you are patient, just look
impatient because THAT pays
its fun to make milkshakes isnt it especially with me?
only if you stop being so cheap with the strawberries
and give me MORE
I'm hanging from the rafters?
i do that sometimes until i'm captured and tied to
a pole to prevent me from doing it again
full of funny moments?
that and popcorn
its just not appropriate to do that?
yea, but other times you just don't fucking care and
you do it anyways to see the looks on their stupid faces when
you whip it out... they all gasp and grandma just STARES...
wouldn't care if anyone had a tonne of the wacky weed and just
tiped it in the ocean or whatever the stuff is bad I tell you?
how about you give me that and I'LL take care of it so you'll
never have to see it again... oh and call before you come over
from now on... just so i can uh... you know... put on coffee...
and see now you can focus on getting all those other harmful chemical
drugs off the planet... don't dump it into the water because that
won't help anything... and who knows what crackhead dolphins are
A vIrGIn?! (just wondering)-Spanky the retarded cat
no i'm not and yes i know that plush animals and dead
things don't count as REAL sex...
the best way to rid myself of these pesky little rappers? they
can't stay out of my way.
run them over
DC, how did you guess? all right, so i'm in a straight jacket,
alright? i have no M&Ms will you get me some? i once was in
your monitor but now i'm free. but not any more... they found
me and put me in here... the walls are soft... when the cats take
over, will they set me free? i could serve them. plus, i could
be insane at people and make them surrender to the cats. i like
ceiling. ceiling nice, floor bad. narf. 123456789blastoff. or
should that be 9876543210blastoff? hmmmm. tricky, tricky, tricky,
tricky, tricky dicky, the crime fighting marshmallow. he tastes
gooooooood. i like. - Fido Dido ps ¡tuesday! ¿eat tae? - Fido
Dido™ the insane
i want a jacket too... i want a jacket too... i want a jacket
too... no ANYTHING till i get one... the cats will only help those
that they see fit... and i don't think anyone will vote for you
besides your narf... but maybe i'll come visit you to pick up
these questions arent really questions, but statements with question
marks on the end of them? however all the crunchy hippo ¿noodles?
- Fido Dido
i've been noticing that... and perhaps i'll have to whip your
sorry ass with my tail...
bam. clam. any more for any more? - Fido Dido
pron. not porn, just pron. ¿? - Fido Dido
that's it... 10 lashes... and then 10 with a whip
i think you have issues that need resolving. damn straight. i
have answered my own question. burn the squirrels, for they have
nickéd the mower of lawns. - Fido Dido waz ere?
i love most of my issues and the rest i squeeze into a tiny ball
of rage until it consumes me
you find the slope of 18=2x + 3y?
ask it nicely
realise you're supporting the addage, "Ask a stupid question
get a stupid answer"? - Mzebonga
yes i do... its pretty obvious...
annoy you when people ask you lots of questions in one go? - Mzebonga
So, does this question annoy you? - Mzebonga
How about this one? - Mzebonga
Does this one annoy you? - Mzebonga
How many questions would I have to ask before you got REALLY,
VIOLENTLY annoyed? - Mzebonga
Do you ever wonder what people who ask questions on this website
do with their lives? - Mzebonga
Does the amount of questions on this site placed by me help answer
the previous question? - Mzebonga
Would it be a good idea if I shut up now? - Mzebonga
Are you aware that I've been drinking? - Mzebonga
Is this getting tedious? - Mzebonga
Would you be happy if this was my last question? - Mzebonga
Will you ever forgive me for all this questions? - Mzebonga
Well, it gave you something to do, didn't it? - Mzebonga
you're going to get a whipping after fido dido does...
Oh oh oh!
Pick me! Pick me! Ooo, you smell nice. is it safe to come out
yet? Why won't he touch me? If he's mad about the thing with the
Couscous I pinkypromise i thought it was an animal. he knows my
heart goes out to him, especially after I found out about his
problem with erections. Wait a minute, How does he know hes gay
if he's never had a hard on?! Is he just using me for the sex
or is it because of my sexy Muppet lunchbox?I had a lunchbox with
Buddah on it once. I sure do miss that lunchbox. It was shiny
and new until they took it for evidence. OW! I poked myself in
the eye. how is it that your hand lands on any random space in
the world and it happenes to be your eye. That's not random at
all, is it? Anyway, on with the questions: A.Do you have itchy,
burning sensations in your private Areas? 2. how much will you
pay me to massage your ears? D. Up and downvs. Back and forth
vs. in and out real slow? and finally: 3. What's that smell? _Dibbley
(Buddah Told Me To) P.S. Howdy!
A. not usually but sometimes yes... and sometimes it feels good
D. i don't know.. keep doing it all until i decide which one i
3. dead worms
can i see your muppet lunchbox?
I hit the
button twice. I'll have to rape him with a fork now.... Y Tu?
_Dibbley (I didn't know you could legally do that with a skwerul
in 4 states!)
make sure it's a rusty fork
TRY to kick my ass, but seriously kidz, he's a monkey and i'm
a bitch. who's gonna come out on top in this scenario? -Empriss
they all know i can kick your stupid ass while having someone
suck on my tail... in fact maybe that's what you should be doing
instead of trying to dream up impossible scenarios where you inflict
pain upon me in a way i don't enjoy...
fetch me a crocodile hunter?
do it yourself lazy ass... well what you've got to
do is sneak up quietly behind him...
could go back in time and prevent the filming of one movie what
would it be?
Annie... i hate that little orphan bitch and i think
daddy warbucks shoulda fucked her till she split open and her
dumbass mutt could eat whatever is left of her body and choke
to death on it
and empriss nikon have something going on together since you want
to kick her ass isnt that a romatic gesture,and is she your sock
monkey fuck slut?
yes, in fact you'll ALL my little sluts...
have an insane quotes section?
we did have one but it got to be a copy of insane
tattoos "pokes tongue out"hehe I'm not allergic to anything
"does a dance". Am I a tad bit rude?
only slightly... mostly childish... no one cares about
your stupid tattoos... HATE you....
I'm a fan
of chocolate milkshakes myself you can have all the strawberries
well then get to it... i'm hungry damnit
in canada yet you have no food thats symbolic of canada, thats
bullshit there must be something?
you just want to put people in tidy little categories
don't you? well fine... if i had to pick foods that i think are
'canadian' then i'll say maple syrup and tim hortons coffee...
for more fabulous canadian info... see our canadian
your advice is quite crappy?
yea well look what i have to work with sometimes...
i think that you should send me money so i feel better
a bit of a try hard sometimes?
a 'try hard'? it sounds like way too much work
damnit... don't make me turn this site around... cuz
i will damnit and then NO ONE will have fun EVER again and when
we get home i'm going to beat your ass in so hard that you'll
think it's somehow romantic
almost finished yet?
yes... thankfully... my head is beginning to get sore...
are cool little creatures aren't they?
i have no idea what they are but they haven't bothered
me so i'll go with yes
a fun day out with you and Jcp involve?
her taking my ass somewhere cool and i don't have to
pay for it... cds... some masks... a few odd items to throw at
pedestrians... some colored sunglasses and a sack of money to
humor be fun again?
when did it stop? i mean REALLY stop?
problems, what should i do?
keep coming back here and get a few more
world was made of cotton wool and the sea was made of condensed
milk, would the sea be soaked up by the eartj???- lover of all
no, because all the birds would rip apart the planet to make nests
and then the condensed milk would just kinda hang out there until
it got bugs and had to be tossed out
it that whenever I cut myself there's this substance that comes
out of my body that is red? -Nicole-
i'm not sure... keep going until you get another color...
If it happened
once can it happen again?
maybe... and then even again
why do they call those white shirts
wife beaters... do abusive men wear them or something?
i'm not sure what the deal is with that referal... i suppose it
is to imply that those who would beat their wives would also have
no concern for their outward appearance, caring only enough to
put one of those white shirts on
with water dangerous
i can't see why it would be...
my books never balance its those damn kitties they keep buying
treats, adam is pissed the books don't balance? help dc?
you are beyond help... and your books don't balance cuz when you're
not looking the kitties steal some numbers
the sky blue when my shits green?
well the other way around would just be stupid
on your logo looks like my cousin?
maybe it is...
everyone afraid of anthrax? i like it on my toast.
well enjoy your meal
can i have
your web site for my own sexual enjoyment?
you can only read it for your sexual enjoyment... its
is it true
that the song "i've got the power" is the theme song
to all successful business woman wearing shoulder pads? why?
yes and if you watch the video backwards you'll understand that
it doesn't really matter at all
fuck!? -Crazy Chris
everything is just a fucking mess...
on bitch. i'm taking you down. and you even try to stick your
little bitchass tail in my mouth and i'll bite that shit off.
yeah i will. i wasnt aware that my intense hatred for you was
actually interest in you. think we could work with that? maybe
we should just join forces and beat up the little shit that's
asking these stupid questions in the first place.
insanity is always attractive... unless its the type that makes
you pray and buy britney spears albums... let's go kick their
me fora being insane? why? damn that coffee, and those lousy red
ones - Fido Dido
yes... bring me more coffee and maybe i won't hit you
as hard as i can...
M&Ms , I might share if DC appologizes for calling us all
sluts? hehe Sally
well... i apologize for calling SOME of you sluts...
but the rest of you know that you are sluts and that you'll never
be anything but a dirty slut the rest of your life so why don't
you touch my tail?
hate words between Dc and empriss nikon,it's so obvious your hot
for each other, just admit it?
what does that have to do with my kicking her ass?
feelings are irrelevant when there's an ass kicking to be dealt
have a thing where you have all our icq numbers because some of
us question askers might want to get to know one another when
we aren't thinking up insane questions for you and quite frankly
I'd like to get to know some of these people?
well start putting it after your names (just the icq number, nothing
fancy, no sigs or websites or nothing) and then when there are
quite a few then we'll put them online
Ok so I
am sittin on the couch playin video games and i see the two cats
makin out...All of a sudden i hear a crash from outside. I ran
out and there in my very yard, the Juiceman had crashed into my
tree. I ran up to him and helped him. But he needed no help for
he was the almighty. So i brought him in and talked to him. We
watched cartoons and channel 6. Then as i was sittin there and
now heres my question. Do u think those cats are gay? JellyFishToast
those cats may have been gay, but does it really matter when those
cats are just puppet decoys to distract you from what's REALLY
im so fantastic?
that's just what your mommy tells you... you're nothing
day someone told me to eat shit and die. Is this possible? -ZIMIAN
well both are possible, and i'm sure if you ate enough
shit or choked on the shit while eating it then you could die
ran off.... do you have rex the runt over there? he is funny,
but not as funny as vince. if i paid you money would you bitchslap?
BEEP. hmmmm. press the donkey, an the hey noddy noddy runs away.
answer this almighty DC: why exactly did the dish run away with
the spoon? - Fido Dido
rex the runt? no... not here.... and i don't care much
for vince... i will bitchslap anyone for money... and i told you....
you have to realize that the spoon isn't there to begin with...
plastic pot plants. are the flies allies of the almighty Cats?
they could be useful spies. or how about spiders? - Fido Dido,
servant of the Cats (and DC on tuesdays, and frumlashdays. for
competitive rates call me now on: 666 FIDO-DIDO)
flies are an alien species that are just studying us along with
the white mice... and spiders are the transmitters... they spin
their web and then transmit the information
people really shrink? Or is it that we, as a species are getting
progessivly larger and will run out of room for our massive bodies
in the year 2033?
i think that many older people may lose an inch or
two as their bodies 'settle' but i haven't been out measuring
them all since they caught me trying on that one old ladies diapers...
and i think the real reason that people will have massive bodies
by 2033 is due to fast food and people being too lazy to get off
their fat asses for even 10 minutes of exercise a day...
we do when the earth is to small for us in 2033? - BuddahDUck
i say leave it like we should be doing anyways... i
think there might be enough room out there for us... but if we
don't get off the planet soon then humankind is as dead as the
love got to do, got to do with it? -BuddahDUck
nothing... no matter WHAT anyone says
do it again?Just because its so insane to do that. Sally ,My icq
maybe again... and then twice... maybe a few times
on the way home too
Can i mess
with your head for a bit?
sure... just don't start cutting things
water question, water is not damaging at all the only thing that
is damaging is if you actually have sex with someone in the bath
of water because well its damn uncomfortable and your knees bang
on the bath and it hurts and your head bangs on the bath and it
hurts. But having sex in a spa is completely erotic and fun as
long as your both sitting up and if your on your own it would
be even better with those bubbles bubbling against your skin.uh
bubbles.................hmmm I think I might go find a spa want
to join me? So water isnt damaging.
sure i'll join you... and i think we should videotape the whole
thing and post it here so that others can see for themselves how
to do it properly
are cool arent they?
i don't know... i haven't been in one yet...
knows it , that hatred is just your cover , well its both of your
covers, you'll be getting it on soon, you and empriss nikon. And
feelings have everything to do with it. Ass beating is a romantic
gesture everyone knows it.So thats it
well thanks for the update... you know your hostility is quite
enjoyable as well... would you like to spank me?
If I eat
17 nachos can develop an alien's set of fang's?
i've tried that and it doesn't work... instead i just
went to the road, scraped off some dead thing from it and took
its teeth... then i made my own little type of 'braces' system
to hold them in place... i practice growling in the mirror for
hours in case burglars ever come and try to steal my light bulbs
So if I
put whipped cream on you and licked it off would you comfortable
yes... but just to make sure... do it again
I feel compelled to bite you? If someone bites me I hate it Why?
and where exactly do you want to bite me???
have regrets and what are they?
those white birds that fly around in florida?
if i had any then ana would eat them... oh no... i thought you
mean egrets... oh... well i have a few regrets... mostly for stuff
that i should have done but didn't for some reason or another
think you should take care of the wacky weed because well you'll
probably smoke it. So I will burn it then?
i think that that's exactly why i should dispose of
Yeah people who
rock are cool,I rock am I cool?
anyone who says they rock isn't cool...
friend has the hellish girlfriend you speak of?
well more of a friend of a friend... and i'm so sick
of hearing about it that i don't even want to think about it anymore...
the problem with giving people the right to choose what they do
is that most people choose wrong
can have the peasure but not the money and I don't think you would
like my cds,is that okay?
i'll take pleasure anytime...
what question asker would you meet for a good reason ?(kicking
ass isnt a good reason)
i rarely have good reasons for doing anything... in
fact most times i don't need a reason at all... but i guess i
would choose to meet that jack-o-lantern that wrote in that one
people grew on trees?
i'd be in favor of cutting down the rainforests
don't do it again?
fine but the next time you want to do that then you
let me know...
do you have for sale at the moment? I'm interested in getting
mzebonga is for sale... but you have to promise to
beat him... and not just weekly...
what do you think
of Mike Patton's new band? -keglineq
which one? i can think of at least
4 you could be talking about... you know i seriously think
that people should look into getting some DNA from this guy and
seeing if he isn't just some sort of music-robot designed to just
sing and spew music all the time... not that i'm complaining
you got all wrong I don't want you to perform tricks for my kids
you know I don't have any, I want you to perform for me because
I'm selfish and I don't like to share. Will you jump through the
hoop, come on just once to satisfy my ego? Sally
sigh... fine but you better be rubbing my tail for a while then...
and no flames...
can you be for me?
how bad can you handle?
you for my viewing pleasure, what will you being showing today?
well it's kind of cold today so you can only see from
the waist up unless you agree to warm me up... then you can see
everything but the feet
If we sell
Dc on ebay we might get enough to run the site for ourselves?
you really think you'd get that much? i didn't know
i meant that much to you all... i'm touched... truly touched
and why did you put your fist through a wall? This should be interesting?
well it was 'one of those days' and i was arguing with
my mother ( i lived at home at the time) and had been doing so
for about an hour or two... i'm hungover from the night
before... then the batteries started to die on the smoke detector
so it started screeching... i had to get a stool to reach it...
so i'm up there with it blaring in my ears... my mom is still
screaming at me... the cover wouldn't come off the smoke detector
and it keeps going and then the cats start yowling because of
the noise... the smoke detector sliced open my finger somehow...
and to make a long story story it ends with a hole in the wall
and a broken smoke detector
I think your over doing it and would like to come over and be
your servant, is that okay?
sure... i've been saying that for years...
was out for my walk today and dammit a child came past running
and screaming I look back and the father is just wandering along
not a care in the world .Why do people let their kids run riot?
because people are STUPID and they think 'hey.. why not let my
brat run around screaming because who cares about anyone in the
area that might not want to hear this? why teach my kids
to think about others when they can just be little assholes' and
those some stupid people wonder why everyone else is so rude all
build snowmen together?
no... but when you're done... call me and i'll come
push it over
Is it alright
for a human to be seen out with a sock monkey?
yes... especially if the human is just running errands
for the sock monkey or cat race
that look a bit a strange?
not really... i mean if tom green can rig up that sausage
eating contraption in his living room then damnit i mean anything
is possible and its time we start doing this stuff... i'm
sure some freak would discover a way to cheaply get us off the
planet and living in space... the freaks are the future...
So if you
don't say something to a chick you like you might be letting a
good one get away?
exactly... welcome to one of my regrets
Where would you
like to go on holiday to another country?
well minus all the shit going on right
now in the world... i guess i'd want to see china or maybe
chick singers do you like then?
well that chick from garbage is ok when she's being
all dark and twisted... uh... and... well i guess that's it
So is it
worth getting sick to have a drink of alcohol?
not the way i get sick no...
a babysitter? ahahahahhaha I would have thought you could look
well i think everyone has had a babysitter at some
point... and when i was in my early teens the parents didn't think
i should be left in charge of my younger brothers life for some
strange reason... and feared for the safety of their home
were to be left on the planet with 6 people who would they be
and why? Because everyone else got shot into space to die just
like you wished for.
no it's ME who wants to go into space... and i guess i'd keep
whoever i could think of at the time... i doubt that those six
people would want to stay with me though hahaha
when YOU get high?
usually i just get a bit relaxed and can focus on accomplishing
something... or sometimes accomplishing nothing
obsessed with your boxers , what kind do you have on today?
you're assuming i'm clothed when answering these questions
i don't like the word spiffy, it's annoying don't you think?
spiffy is a word you use with your parents when they
want you to say something about some little thing they've done
and so you say 'spiffy' so they feel good and stop bugging you
you always have to be right?
its just easier on us all if i am...
your mom and dad visit this site and what do they think of it?
i know they've seen a few articles that i've written
(remember i'm not the only one working on this site)... but i
am not aware of them reading beyond that... my mom really liked
the shopping bag article and the cow cocoon idea actually began
with my father telling us that when on a long drive somewhere...
do you wander around the carpark looking for cars?
well i call them parking lots... but not usually because
there are lots of cars there... so i just wander around looking
at what people keep in them and taking notes/pictures
kick that programmers sorry ass from here to kingdom come , we
want a forum, we want a forum. What are you gonna do about it?
i'm going to send them hate mail and pictures of dead animals...
and then they will sever my connection to the internet by beating
my head in with my laptop... they're in a programming gang...
I saw you
sneak in the back door?
everyone do it with the postman? Plus he must have tonnes of kids?
because he's prompt, courteous, and efficient...
make a differance if you had a shower first then had a bath?
baths aren't needed... i'm not a bath person
chance, what would you do with a backstreet boy?
i would brainwash him to rape and kill the other backstreet
boys, brittney spears, and the cast of all reality shows... then
come back to me so i can beat him to death
Can I have
a little green head to mount on my wall? -BuddahDUck
people mount dead rotting animal heads on their walls? -BuddahDUck
i have NO idea... but maybe we should all start hanging
our 'food tropheys' on the wall... i'll start stapling those tv
dinner containers to my wall... at least that doesn't stare back
the little green things in the spaghetti sauce? -BuddahDUck
uh... i didn't see any in mine... but if it kills you
can i try eating some of your flesh?
Why do people put those stupid little
sweaters on their dogs? It's STUPID LOOKING AND IM SURe thE DOG
AINT TO FOND OF IT EITHER, -BuddahDUck again.
Micheal Jackson miraculously changed colour?
damnit... what color is he NOW?
you are happy as larry, was larry happy?
larry wasn't happy at all
birds suddenly appear every time you are near?
they want to peck my eyes out and leave me to die as
they fly over my body squawking
Tomohawk band? Shirley Manson looks like shit now do you agree??
well i've heard a few mp3s and i'm pretty sure that
they are indeed real songs by tomahawk as i can clearly hear patton...
and from what i've heard it sounds pretty good... i will be purchasing
the album... as for shirley manson... i haven't seen a picture
of her lately
Is it okay
for a sock monkey to marry a human?
I'll spank you , Where and what with?
whoo hooo! on my ass and use your hand for now... and
tell me what a bad monkey i've been
to bite your arm please I'll try not to draw blood?
leave my arms alone... you can have my neck or shoulders...
many good chicks have you let get away?
i don't know... i don't keep a list or anything of
you sorting through your issues?
what? when was i supposed to start doing that? i must
have missed that meeting
i get a job?
3 weeks from now
perfect, and practice makes perfect, then why bother your ass
well sometimes you just need something to do for a
mix an oxo cube with laughing cow cheese do you get a laughing
you get dead cow with stuff that used to be in that
DC,DC DC hare hare. is there a fan club of yours that i can join?
a fan club? i don't think thats the sort of thing that
i should have to do for myself... but you can go right ahead and
start one up as long as you send me some free stuff...
come the nnnnnice pppeople in my hhhhouse issssist on strrraping
me uuuup sooooo tight?
so you feel all warm and snuggly and if you don't like
it... send ME the jacket... damnit i want one!
the superoir race of alien chipmunks going to take of the word
again? (you may not remember the first two times cause they wiped
your brain obviously, mines immune)
that's just a rumor the cats started to weed people like you out....
minutes or hours a day do u spend on the web site answering questions
well that depends on how many questions have been asked
and how much of an answer each question deserves...
was light? And it was good? I'm inclined to disagree, if there
was no light I wouldn't have seen what I woke up to yesterday
morning. - Mzebonga
it was good? who says that? can light be good or bad? aren't those
am i the
only one who eats frozen peas? -keglineq
it was O.K. for a sock monkey to marry a human. If this happens,
and they have children, what will the children be? Can I buy one?
And this is a little off topic, but do sock monkey vampires exist
and where could I find them? -gone postal
they shouldn't be having children... no one should
be... and yes sock monkey vampires exist but they suck the fluff
out of other stuffed animals... you can find them in large department
sure, if someone would do something to bring it upon
me... you can start but rubbing my tail
bite your neck but don't blame me if I sever an artery?
You have many, many issues but we still adore you, but you do
have to work them out ,the meeting is every Friday are you coming?
i guess if i have to... do i get one of those jackets that make
me hug me? can i have a black one?
be stark raving mad to do THAT?
yea... but it's kinda fun sometimes
people collect fridge magnets?
they have been brainwashed to do so because those magnets
are actually little microphones used to spy on you
some people have rediculous doorbells?
they are ridiculous people that buy ridiculous things...
people with aids got their freak on would the disease inside them
become double its impact like the perfect storm, or would they
cancel out like the blood of the outbreak monkey being the cure
of a spreading plague?
i think i'll choose option 2... they will cancel each other out
like the blood of the outbreak monkey thing
why do they bother teaching somewhat educated people how to use
and exactly who on the plane are the educated people?
you can't possibly mean the everyday public because they're idiots
who have to be told everything... for those of us who really are
smart we know to tune out cuz we've already got our damn seatbelts
on and have demanded a pillow
the difference between a terrorist and a freedom fighter??
the monthly cost and the membership card
any gay sock monkeys ? ?
yes, as well as some bisexual ones... basically sock
monkeys will have sex with anything willing... and then there
are those sock monkeys that prefer to suck their own tails even
if someone else offers to do it for them for free...