Results for 2001

if trapped in a room and given only a fork, some cheese and a parachute, what would you do?


Squash some cheese , comb my hair with fork and make the parachute into a dress. - Sally

I would use the cheese to attract a rat or small mammal. I would use the parachute to trap it, and then I would use the fork to eat it. I would need the fork because it wouldn't be cultured to eat the rat with my fingers. - Crazy Matt

eat the cheese........and make a smallt en twiththe orkand parachute - megalin

Does this room have a window? You need to be more specific, my mind can't handle this creative freedom. - Meowmix

lay out the parachute as a rug and have lunch. - frazicus

eat the cheese, then the parachute, then use the fork to kill myslef because im screwed on food - rachael

I would eat the parachute, and use the fork to fling the cheese at the little camera over in the corner. - gone postal

the fork because i might starve and instead i could eat that weird stuff between mt toes - Ninja x

Um, poke the cheese, stick it down my pants and then put the parachute on, and hide under it until I died of suffercation. What would you do? I mean, dude.. C'mon. - Zero_Chunky

Stick the fork in my ass the cheese in my mouth and the parachute around my waist. The people that trapped me would feel so bad for me that they would let me go. - hfghfgh

I would wrap my self in the parachute then use the fork to climb the wall once on the ceiling i would jump into the cheese and wait for someone to come in and eat the cheese and my self then i would wait for them to shjit me out then thank them and walk away - Choadboy

i would make a window with the fork, put the parachute on my back and jump out the window. the cheese could be my decoy to distract the fat mice from eating my fork. - EvilPopTart

well, It would depend on what kind of cheese. And would the room have windows? I'm assuming yes, but the window would want to span shut. to solve this I would use the cheese(unless it was cottage cheese or another variety of nonsolid cheese) to prop the window open. Then I would attach the parachute to the fork, and let the fork save itself and go for help. - InsaneLane

i would use the fork to find out the cosmic transambuperlation of the puesdo-antimatter, then using a high energy positron-quark annhilation convertor i had in secreted in a private place on my person, procede to nullify the chese into producing some C60-Si49 ions. with this i would fill the parachute. then, the guards would come in to lookat this amazing technicolour/supermaration/argle thing, i would run out the door. then eat some purple. - Fido Dido

i would sit on the parachute (a nice cushion for my bony ass) and eat the cheese, of course. who the fuck wouldn't? unless of course they have something against cheese. as for the fork, i guess it would sit there. maybe i'd pick the cheese out of my teeth with it if i was so inspired. - lee

I would just do what MacGuyver would do. Make a bomb to blow a hole in the wall and escape. - Stubbyneez

well, first I would use the parachute to make one of those cool ass forts, and then make come cheese people to worship me. And of course the fork would be for probing the ones who didn't. - Chicken

I would use the Fork for digging and I would eat the chees and If I had to I would keep the parachute for fun latter when I get out - Precios-one

id tempt the mice to open the door with the cheese. then i would trap them with the parachute and stab the fuck out of them, because i know it was them who trapped me there, those wily bastards - psychotic_freak

umm I would destroy the door with the fork..have a snack , and bag the first person to come near me - independent_bitch

eat the cheese, finger my self with the fork, and come all over the parachute - apple pie girl

I would place the cheese between my bottocks and allow it to melt there-in. Then, having caused the cheese to melt with the heat of my body, I would, strictly as a matter of convenience, scratch my anus and/or rectum with said fork as need be. Then, having retrieved the cheese, I would secure the parachute to the wall with the aforementioned fork (having removed the cheese, placing it on my nipples and allowing to harden, NOTE: I would have been without clothing save for a tattered afghan blanket which has been stapled to my back and the protruding bone structure at the back of my skull called the "occipital bone" <take a feel, its there>, by the very same homeless person from whom the afghan was originally stolen, and done so at my request) and proceed to stare at it intently, willing the parachute to catch afire. Having failed, I would then close my eyelids to slits, purse my lips, and with severely frustrated and grainy tone of voice, would say "tick. tick. go around it fuckin beach fuck. shut your fuck. mmm. here it is for you leper. my love. my leper" as I slowly wagged my limp penis at it, trying to hit it gently of course by means of moving my hips back and forth, and sometimes round and round. I would repeat this scenario until I either ceased to live or was physically prevented from continuing by some outside force. - Dr. Phinnaeus Fiddlesticks, Phd

I would use the fork to eat the cheese then wrap myself in the parachute until i died from starvation - wahine

I would stick the fork through the parachute and then put the cheese on the fork so it looked like a little person with a cape. Then I would make it dance and talk to it. - Princess

It depends on the building materials of the room but I would try and dig out with the fork like in Shawshank Redemption, try to catch rats and mice with the cheese and use the Parachute as warmth and bedding. - Mzebonga

eat the cheese using the fork and jump out the window with the parachute - zuardeuh

i would fashion the parachute into a cute little jumpsuit. everyone likes jumpsuits. and then i would place the cheese in my undergarments to time how long it would take my body heat to melt it. - Empriss Nikon

I'd have something to scratch my ass with while I thought about what to do. I'd probably shove the cheese up my ass to stop the mice stealing it and i'd make a wedding dress out of the parachute and ask the guard if he'll marry me. - fergus o'dimbal

Probably cry and ask for my mummy. - Sophie Wophie

I guess I would have a solo costume party. I would go as the cheese parachute woman with a fork in the forehead. Boo! - nirojah

Play GI joe with them until i drove my self to such insanity i roll over and die. - ZIMIAN

First, I would throw the cheese in a corner, but not look to see where it landed. Then, I would get myself thoroughly tangled up in the parashute and its cords, and then I would poke my eyes out with the fork, and try to find the cheese. - hungry

I would beg the cats for help. and then i would eat the fork, puke up metal filings into the parachute, and make a rocket fuel out of the filings, and chese, and blow a hole in the wall. - LASER MONKEY!

I'd say, "Now all I need is a ball-point pen and then I can get the hell out of here." - slubs5

I'd dig some choclate outa my ass with the fork, and put it on the chesse for flavor and to preserve it. Id mop up the blood w/ the parachute. - crazy mister

Eat the cheese slowly and use the parachute as a bed. I'd try to kill the wall with the fork in order to amuse myself. Or I'd shove it up my vagina. - Kei-chan

fork a whole in the floor, and strap the parachute to the cheese, that way it could float gently to safety from the giants castle and i'd climb down the beanstalk with my underwear on my head wishing captain toast would come to the rescue. - pineappletree sisscors

I would take the cheese eat it then i would stab myself with the fork and bundle up into the parachute until i died. - and_then

i don;t know! - shellie

ration the cheese,dig thru the wall with the fork, and use the parachute as a nice comfy blanket, if i am digging thru a wall with a fork, I could be here a while. - bum face

throw away the cheese, kill myself with the fork after the parachute lost its interest - becks

I would eat a part of the Cheese, then put dirt on it, then call the sentinel and tell him that I'ill because I ate that fuckin rotten cheese, and as he approaches, I would plant the Fork in his fuckin ass and then roll him into the parachute tissue, kick his ass again, say something like "you'll never have me alive" and then run and escape home or to a disco.. - baz

eat the cheese with the fork if neccessary..and fly out of the room with the parachute - Speedy..because i'm quick in my wheelchair

cry eat and cry - star

Take a nap - yes

Try to get out. - Mzebonga

eat the parachute and make penguin sculptures out of the cheese. - Syko Grrrl

eat the cheese, then make a fort out of the parachute, and keep the fork in case i need to stab something...or eat myself. - underd-o-double g

Call the Ghostbusters? No, maybe the Teletubbies. - Teletubbies will rule!  RULE, I TELL YOU!!!

Stab shit with the fork, eat the cheese, and might try and suffocate something with the parachute. - blunt man

lay the parachute out sit down and eat the cheese with the fork - Ledge

stick the fork and the parpchute in the ceiling and hang myself after eating the cheese - Ice...

spread the parachute out on the floor as a table cloth and eat the cheese over it with the fork - loveandhugs2001

I'd eat the cheese with the fork - me....

try to find away out - agent99

play with the fork,eat the cheese,and go to sleep on the parachute. - jenny

eat the cheese, light the parachute on fire and stab myself to death with the fork before i burned. - Eva Psychotic

i would poke holes in the parachute push the chesse through the chute make lagres amounts of string cheese.i'll then take all the string cheese and make furniture, a tv,and maybe a cat and i already have all the imaginary friends i need. - demonboy "_"

Eat cheese and then escape through a rudimentary form of flatulant propulsion made possible only if the cheese in question was gorgonzola. The fork of course being used as a battering ram of some kind.... The mind boggles - fussili

punch holes in the parachute with the fork melt the cheese by sitting on it and then filter it through the parachute. - Fluffy the evil one

Jerk off - juan teez

nuthing much - m0jo

use them to create a thermo-nuclear warhead and a very very very tiny nuclear bunker big enough to fit me and the cheese into, id detonate the bomb, after hiding in the bunker, and use the cheese to live the 40 billion years itd take for the radiation to goa way. - Twizzles

i'd eat the cheese, take a nap using the parachute as a balnket and use the fork to make a bunch of noise and dig my way out of the room. - twiztidangel

pull off a macguiver and use those 3 items to free myself. - crankyno,

Eat the parahute using the fork and spend many hours thinking about how I could successfully use the cheese to survive if put in a situation where I had to jump from ans aeroplane. - Leki

its a little known fact that when combining cheese with the nylon used to make parachutes a highly explosive material is created, so i would just blow a whole in the wall and walk to freedom. - Billy Bob Whoreton

i would temp mice with the cheese and have them help me to dig a way out (i would be using the fork)and the parachute...erm..well you didnt say it was ground floor! - sparki

eat the cheese then suffocate myself with the parachute.... weeee - Cat

eat the chesse 4 energy fight my way out with the fork and jump 2 safety with the parachute - Lung

Put the fork in a microwave and watch it while eating cheese out of the parachute. - Duch ( it's not by any fault of my own, really, it's the first four letters of my last name)

Am I tripping? - Misery654

cut up the the cheese and the parachute with my fork and make little parachutes for the cheese then stab myself in the ear to death with the fork because its totally worthless - space

Eat the cheese then try out some of the fillet of parachute, live off that for a while. absorb the all nutrients i could get from one parachute, and jackie chan drop kick through the wall then survive by eating the wood or concrete(whatever the wall is made out of). hopefully concrete i need my iron. - ricidulous

i would eat the cheese, cut through the walls with the fork, and if i found myself in a very tall building, i wuold parachute to my death. - chiquitita


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