Results for 2001

thoughts on various ways of making purple monkey trees

I dont know, but i have decided to be a lemon.  Why? Because if I were a banana, i could not jump in and out of the gin and tonic.-Lemon Fresh

well, purple monkey trees are rather difficult to grow in my climate, because the rats always are munching on the mushy monkey balls i put out to fertilize the water. plus, i just don't have enough hippotamuss' anal leeches to pollinate the tree. but i think that if someone had a way to kill all the rats (maybe a cannibal rat...) and plenty of mushy monkey balls, and enough hippos' anal leeches, they could probably have a whole orchard of purple monkey trees. that is, until i came along, and being very jealous of their sucess, destroyed them all by putting all of my rats in their orchard. and then i would laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh and laugh as the tears streamed down their faces for their dead purple monkey trees.-madien of the morbid death flowers

plant a purple monkey tree seed silly!-Kitten

wha?-Cirrus

Breed Piss on them -Dan

First, take a pint of sugar, thirty cubits of flour, and a bale of straw, mix it together, bake it at 3000C for twenty days and out pops a spider monkey! Er..wait, goddamnit. SPider monkeys are the devils work.-Pilot

i hate purple -J love

Ah, the fine purple monkey trees. Quite simple to make actually. First of all, you need a 3 year old virgin palm tree, and approximately a pound of LSD. Paint the tree purple, extra points if you add cool glitter swirls. Take LSD. Sit back and watch the maniacle rabbits chase the purple tree, with monkeys in it, around the room. -Chiron7936

why purple? purple is sooooooooo unflattering - it just doesn't bring out the warmth of the chocolatey brown eyes of the monkeys that would live in them. However, if they had to be purple, i suppose you could go to the mice and ask them - they'd know, but I'm not sure what they'd want in return for telling you.......but what the hell, what have you got to lose? (Oh, and while you're with the mice, could you get me the number of the guys that make planets? I hate this place and want to start my own civilisation on another planet, preferably in a different galaxy...wanna come with me?)-EP

its scary -scary

dont skull fuck my uncle curb stop the cat ect ect go midevil humpy on as many girls as possible -squirrel

freeze dry the monkeys and cover them in some sticky purple liquid that little kids seem to get all over everything. ask a little kid, they'll know where to find some. then you stick the monkeys together with toothpicks in some sort of strange tree shape.-jose

Don't they already have those in production? Oh wait, no thats seamonkeys, never mind.-Insane Wanderer

well first you take some snow add some ELs and PFs and then stroke it gently for a while  -agafapoonah

Get a bunch of gerbals and dye them purple and hang them from trees and let their blood dripp all over the trees and make them purple too.-lizard queen

Grind up a purple monkey into a fine power, deposit this purple monkey powder into your used underwear, seal the purple monkey powder underwear in a bag of halloween cnady that you had stolen from a small child the last time halloween came around, and put it in a large hole in the ground. Cover it with manure.-Pisty

First feed the monkey something that's make their skin turn purple. After sometime their offspring will start coming out purple, then we can take some of their hair and mix it with some radioactive waste, bury it and hope that a tree will grow. If it does we'll have purple radioactive monkey trees.-PrettyNightmare

take one purple people eater and breed with one everyday average monkey. stick the offspring into a combining machine and and a tree. Walla purple monkey trees :)-smurf

monkey trees dont exsist especially not the purple ones.-sally

blue-tack, food colouring and hope-maz