Answered by: Herbert
there Walmarts in Canada? In Europe? In Australia? In Alaksa?
On Mars? On Pluto? On my roof? Ok wow I just asked a whole buncha
questions I'm smart! PyroPrincezz (I burned a shoe yesterday
and it was fun :D)
I've seen a Walmart here! It's big and scary and filled with
bright lights. I've never been to Europe, Australia, Alaska,
Mars or Pluto. Last time I was on your roof I didn't see anything
except a tennis ball and a bird. Was it an ugly shoe? I hope
so! I would cry if you had burnt a nice shiny shoe that I could
have loved and hugged. I'm glad you had fun though! See how
fun shoes are! Yay for shoes!
why do frogs fly overhead
when the clouds are low enough for snow at 12:30 pm?
Um I don't know! This is the sort of thing thathinguywhois would
ask. Are you related to him? Are you him in hiding?
First off I would like to know
what is the absolute best song to sing when you are in the shower.
that is just a side question that i really wonder about when
i'm in the shower. then i wonder what do you think about in
the shower? Do you ever think about that girl that got away?
In a more serious tone, do you miss her? I'm sure she misses
you. This one time, i drove down a road, and I was lost. Not
really lost, i knew exactly where I was, but in a false reality
I wondered if I was in love with a complete stranger... Have
you ever felt that way? And another thing Herbert, (this is
a more serious question, not that life has to be serious, I
just want to know your soul, because I think that I love you.
But don't worry, I would never stalk you. I would bury you with
love, and passion, and a sweet emotion you'd have never felt
before.) but the question is : Do you have anything in this
world that I can count on??? ~ B_write
I have baths so I don't dance in showers! I think about bubbles,
my tail, shoes and strawberries when I'm in the bath. When it
gets cold I think about getting out. If I thought about lost
love then I'd cry and that would make my bath not be fun anymore.
I like to be happy when I take a bath. You can count on my hugs
B_write! I will love you and hug you and even share my shoes
with you! Yes, even the sparkly ones! You and I can laugh and
have baths together, or maybe even a shower if you hold me up!
We could even make a fort out of blankets and we'd be the rulers
of shiny shoes! You can always count on me for fun and hugs
how do you prefer to fuck? or
have you even fucked anyone eles? do you have any poistions
that you would recommend? will you fuck me? ia m not too skinny
nor to plump? is it bad to eat yourself out? r u ever horny?
i am not usually this sexual bout stuff but this is an excetion
and i need some anwsers. i like to talk and ask questions if
you havent noticed??? *aeslehc*
I like it when I get to hug by a fire. It's so nice and warm
and the hugging just makes it nicer. I would recommend trying
different positions. Some are more fun than others but it depends
who you're with. Eat myself out? I don't know how to do that.
Maybe you can show me when you come over. B_write and I have
plans so I'll have to tell you when it's ok to come over after
that. Sure I get horny lots of times! <Blushes> Did I
tell you about the sparkly shoes I have? You can't touch them
but they're very nice. Mmmmm shoes.
There doesn't seem to be a very
large amount of people asking questions anymore... so I think
I will have to start asking them regularly again...what do you
think Herbert?-bluemonkeyfearer P.S. A friend and I are currently
working on a new story called Fribert and the Moles, and it
might be done sometime soon. Make sure you read it when it is
finally complete! Otherwise you would make me cry.
Your questions are fun bluemonkeyfearer! I'm so glad to hear
you're writing a story, I like your stories! They're fun and
have fun stuff in them! Will you put it on this site too? I'd
never not read your stories bluemonkeyfearer, I'm a fan! Please
come back and ask me questions! I'll give you hugs and everything!
If I ever make you cry then you can come and kick my ass!
how does a guy get a girl to
have analsex and get her to ask for it? I Posted by Ilikerear
I would think you'd have to ask her nicely. Even then, she might
not like that idea. If you're going to do that though, why not
just find a gay man? I mean, they like that and so do you. Wait
a minute, you could be a gay man and not know it. I hope you're
not sad and confused. It's ok for you to be gay. You should
find out so you don't have to try to beg girls to let you. If
you want you could come over and we could talk about it over
cookies and ice cream. Mmmm ice cream.
my lady is acting crazy and
I don't know what to do she keps rubing her ass on me....what
do I do? Ilikerear
Maybe she likes rubbing her ass on you! You should ask her why
she's doing that and maybe she wants you to rub your ass on
From which garment of clothing
did your button eyes originate? (...like I don't know the truth...).
Oh Mort you know that my cute button eyes are from your favorite
pair of pants! <Giggles> Ok so they're not. They didn't
come from anywhere else but from my mom! She gave me these and
they're my eyes! I bet she made them special just for me because
I'm special. She told me I was! I'll give you a hug though and
then you can feel special too Mort. I saw your new picture in
the about us section
and you look like a huggable guy!
Are the food we eat changing
us? There are so many chemicals in almost everything we eat
and so many new diseases that nobody has any idea where they
came from, it seems logical right? PyroPrincezz09
You're smart so I agree with you PyroPrincezz! Why do you have
the number 09 behind your name? It is your magic number? I think
it's sad about all the chemicals and then people want to take
more if they're pills! We should start our own food company
and make it good and yummy food! HerbertSnacks and PyroPrincessLunches.
That'd be great!
herbert, why do you like it
up the arse
Arse? What a silly word! I don't know if I have one of those
but if I do then it depends on what you want to stick up it
and if it feels good. If arse means my ear or my bottom, then
maybe I don't like it if it's something sharp. Sharp things
What do cows drink
Water and grass drink. All the fancy trendy cows have that in
sparkly water bottles. I tried to steal one once so I could
have it and a cow yelled at me. I cried and begged for one but
it kept yelling so I ran home. Cows are mean sometimes.
if i take one pill of ex..i
weigh 97 pounds how long will the affect last and should i take
one pill or half...?
Oh no! You should take none! You should have some HerbertSnacks
and PyroPrincessLunches. They're not near as bad for you. I'll
also give you hugs and then you'll feel super happy for many
hours and for free! If I could put hugs into pill form, then
I could make lots of money! But I'd rather go give real hugs.
I have about 30 feet
of that police caution tape for my small studio, what should
I do with it to decorate? deevinn
Wow! That sounds like fun! You should have a bit of your floor
taped off and put a chalk drawing on the floor of a monkey body.
That would be funny! With the rest then you can put it around
your room or hanging like streamers from the ceiling or cover
one whole wall with it or make a costume out of it that you
always wear when in the room! So many fun things for you to
do, I sure am jealous!
*tap tap tap* Is this
thing on? -krnk
Yes it is! When you hit the button it sends to me so I can answer!
It's not magic or anything like that though. Unless the internet
is really just a lot of fairys that make it all work.
Well Herbert you have repeatedly
asked me how I come Up with my ideas, and I can only tell you
that i was born with Disorganized Compulsive Creativity Disorder©
DCCD which makes me very creative but unable to organize my
ideas into anything usefull other than short blurbs on your
site, many stand up comedians have this as well, and many would
call it an advantage but when we have no one to help organize
our creations they often end up going nowhere, but as a humble
representative of our plight I say that I know when wierdness
is coming on me when my imagination starts to swirl in my head
and ideas suddenly appear in my head, I guess it helps that
I am widely read and have an innate sense of fun and absurdity,
any way why is it that you are so fixated on shoes, was your
first sexual expierience with shoes invloved? do you like roller
blades as well sandals?bye Herbert Thathinguywhois
Wow, DCCD. You even have something with an interesting name!
Maybe I can help you Thathinguywhois! I bet you can do some
wonderfully fun things if I'm helping. Maybe you can write me
stories or something fun. I can read them while in my closet
and snuggling with my favorite shoes! Thank you so much for
explaining things to me and I hope I can help you! My first
sexual experience did involve shoes actually <blushes>
but I don't want to tell everyone about that! When you come
over to give me your stories then I will tell you in person.
I do like roller blades and sandals the same! Sandals make my
feet feel airy and roller blades look fun and fast!
do you whant to go out?
No I'm tired right now. I'm looking forward to curling up in
some nice shoes and sleeping for awhile. I am up late answering
these so I don't feel real bad for not answering these sooner!
when your sitting down you have
a lap where does it go when you stand up-deviousbastard
It is still there only hiding! It's a magic thing that appears
and disappears all the time. My lap is fun when I can put things
on it like kitties and pillows and chip bowls and shoes. Mmmm
We have one bathroom in the
house, and whenever someone is using the facilities, and I have
to take a poop, I'm told to just hold it for a little while
longer. This isn't really a problem, but when I have to urinate
it overflows in my hands. What should I do?
You need to get a bowl or something so that it doesn't get all
over the floor. I know it seems icky to pee in your hands but
pee doesn't have icky stuff in it really. It's not full of germs
from what I've heard but was your hands anyway after. If you
use a bowl, then it makes it easy to clean up and everything!
You should have another bathroom, one just for you! You deserve
it since you've been peeing in your hands and holding in your
Answered by: Herbert
have a question only few can answer....whats the best kind of
pie?!?!........MmMMm pie *gargle*
Mmmmm pie! Pie is yummmmmy! I like lots of pie but the best,
that's chocolate cream pie. It's so yummy and filled with sugary
yummyness! There should be free pie here on TheInsaneDomain!
Maybe I can make pie for everyone and someone nice can help
me hand it out. Mmmmmm free pie!
okay so if stick figures took
over the world and we ended up cross breeding would birds try
to make nests out of the half breed stick full peeps? allso
i want to know where is the bathroom?
Birds are like that! I bet they would make nests out of the
stickbird peeps. It makes me giggle to think about the world
filled with stick people in the streets and then them trying
to have sex with birds. That would be very silly! The bathroom
is down the hall. It's the only door to go into so you won't
accidently piss in my closet or anything. I hope that's not
what you had planned. Pissing on my shoes isn't very nice even
if it does sound like fun.
what hill was the Battle of
Bunker Hill fought? - Rudy
I thought that the answer would be Bunker Hill but then I thought
maybe you were tricking me and there was no battle of Bunker
Hill. It sounded fake! So I looked it up and it really is called
that! You were being tricky Rudy, as it is called that but the
battle was actually on Breed's Hill. Wow, see how I can learn
to look things up! One day I'll be a smart sock monkey and I
can wear glasses and say smart things all the time!
If you knew a woman who
was pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two
who were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis.
Would you recommend that she have an abortion? -DeviousBastard
I'd feel very sad for the kids who were deaf, blind and mentally
retarded. I would give them hugs so they knew that it was ok
for them to be the way they are and they can be happy. Those
kids will tell me if they aren't treated well and I'll help
them to find happy places to be. I don't know what syphilis
is and I'm afraid to look it up! I can't tell the woman what
to do! She has 8 kids and would know how to catch me and give
me a spanking! That's a lot of kids, I bet there would be a
BIG shoe pile by the door! I could live in the pile and maybe
they'd never know!
will sign your shirt Herbert. We could even take photos of each
other and get them printed on our shirts! Would you wear a shirt
with my face on it? - Stunt Fox
Wow Stunt Fox that would be great! What a wonderful idea! I
have seen other people do that before and I'm so happy that
you'd want to do that too! I would wear pants with your face
on them too! And socks! And a hat! And mittens! I'd wear the
whole line of Stunt Fox clothing! Do you think we could make
Stunt Fox and Herbert bedsheets? Pillows! Oh wow pillows would
be the best!
I see that you are naked in
that photo.. Were you feeling unusually frisky when that photo
was taken? Do you still jump around in the nude with people
watching? - Stunt Fox
Being a sock monkey means it's ok to jump around naked! It's
great! You're a fox so you should be able to run around naked
too! I do have pants but they feel weird and make my tail all
itchy. I'm always frisky! I love that word, frisky! It's fun
to say and everything! I will jump around for you if you'd like
that. I can even dance to fun music and whip my tail all around!
is that why you were in tokyo?
Oh I've never been there. I'd like to though. I'd like to go
everywhere and see everyone! I saw on TV there is a woman who
has hugged millions of people! MILLIONS! Wow I was so amazed
and I wanted to go help her hug everyone in the world too! She
is my hero and I should look up her name so I can remeber it
forever and save up enough money to go see her. It's Mata
Amritanandamayi Devi. Wait a minute, she
will be in Toronto in JULY! I CAN GO SEE HER! Now I have
a reason to dance around and be all happy! Wow, hugging her
will be like hugging millions of people! I can help her go around
the world and she'll love me once she sees what a wonderful
hugger I am!
what is japans currency
I know this! It's the Yen. I remember because it sounds fun!
Yen! I've never seen it though. If you have some Yen then you
should send it to me!
I could send you some Canadaian coins or something. I find them
a lot on the floor and in the couch so I'll have some for you!
They have animals on them a lot and some lady who must have
died for a good cause. She is on the back of all of them so
she must have done something really big before she died. Maybe
I will ask Poptart who she is.
Why, Herbert?!? Why must I be
ill today???? Why must there be ooey goo in my lungs, ripping
at my sore throat when I cough, making it even worse..... The
pain, Herbert! The pain...Will you help me Herbert? -bluemonkeyfearer
Oh no! Awww I hope you feel better real soon bluemonkeyfearer!
I can come over and hug you nicely until you feel better. I
will soak myself in cool water so when you hug me, I am also
helping bring down your fever! Poor bluemonkeyfearer! I'll help!
Tell me what to do to make you feel better!
Do you like Dr. Suess and his
stories Herbert? I do. I bet he was on drugs -Stunt Fox
He's very funny! His stories are all fun and they are fun to
read out loud! They're like songs with pictures on paper without
the music. All the funny drawings are fun to look at too. I
would like a poster of some of those drawings to put up in my
closet. I wonder if they make those? When we go out to get our
tshirts and other fun stuff printed, we can see if anyone sells
those posters! Yay, shopping with Stunt Fox!
Answered by: Herbert
So I take it DC isn't coming
back to The Insane Domain... what DID happen to him? - Mort
DC is dead and no one liked him anyway. We should all forget
about him and all the stupid things he said. You love ME now
Mort. I'm much better! I give out hugs. HUGS!
Does KELLEY LOVE ME?
In class I gave her a note and she didn't check the yes box
so no, she doens't. That other girl likes you though. She wrote
hearts around yes and even put her phone number there so you
can call her!
Have you ever frozen mayo? What
No I haven't! I never even thought of that! You must be smart
to come up with such fun stuff to do! I will fill a glass with
mayo tonight to freeze it and then see what happens!
Someone on your previous answers
Took MY NAME! I DONT WONDER WHAT THE BEST PIE IS! I KNOW WHAT
THE BEST PIE IS.... garrrr... of course i wouldnt ask such a
stupid question... errr... im gargle.... dammit... im gargle
and I'm not sharing.! Herbert make That person stop and give
me back my name! and all the variations! like "gargleSwallow"GargleGulp....
argh.. thats me! Thats identity theft.. ... I got a case dammit!
Herbert will you be my witness or at least put a stop to this
outrageous crime against me? I Am Gargle! make sure of that....
the anonymous must be stopped.... must be stopped with your
help... herbert... the one and only sock monkey herbert.-GARGLE
Oh no! I can't control the names on here and anyone can make
up any name they want! Maybe they didn't know that you also
had that name, or maybe it was you but you were having some
sort of weird thing where you don't know it was you! I saw that
happen in a movie once and there were two guys but really it
was just one guy! That could be really scary!
If you knew a woman who was
pregnant, who had 8 kids already, three who were deaf, two who
were blind, one mentally retarded, and she had syphilis. Would
you recommend that she have an abortion? just a follow up on
my question the woman in this question was beethovens mom crazy
I almost deleted this because it looked the same as the first
one I had answered. Next time you should tell me right away
so I know and don't accidently delete it!
Good Job Herbert on the Bunker
hill thing! it was breed hill the next hill over from bunker
hill. Which brings me to my next question. Im full of useless
knowledge and im afraid one day it may cause my head to explode
do you ever feel this way?
No, I don't know lots of stuff like you do! I had to go look
it up and everything! I don't remember stuff for long. I try
to learn and remember things but it just slips my mind. Then
I feel all dumb and silly. You should feel happy that you are
so smart and can remember so much fun stuff!
So...my dad just left my mom
and brother and me because he was "unhappy". And he left half
of his sh*t in our basement. Wanna help me gather all of these
things together and build a bonfire outside his new whore-friend's
house, then put sharp objects and poisonous reptiles in his
bed? - bluemonkeyfearer (in a teenage crisis)
Oh no bluemonkeyfearer! Big hugs go to you so you feel a bit
better. I feel very sad for you and want to give you tons and
tons of hugs. I will help you gather his stuff and burn it!
You and I can burn it and stomp on it and maybe throw it at
him so he hurts too. Then we'll see how unhappy he is! You can
come here and live in my closet if you want, if you need a friend.
We can do lots of mean stuff to him each day until he gives
you lots of money and toys so that you're not sad anymore. I'm
so sorry to hear that happened bluemonkeyfearer :(
What does fluffy monkey poop
Ew! Tasting it would be bad! I have thrown it but I washed my
paws after so that I didn't eat it by accident. I don't like
Dear sock monkey herbeert how
do you like being both a monk and a key? does it unlock the
dors of inner perception oh great swami? are you in touch on
a personal level with hanuman? oh yeah and your cute in tennis
gear makes me want to rub your tail and spank you with shoes
Wow thathinguywhois, your first questions confused me greatly
but I'm so happy you like my outfit and want to spank me with
shoes! You can spank me with them all you want and then we'll
hug after. I have a key to my super special shoe box but you
can't have it!
why are sporks so hot? why are
you so hot? why do i love muffins? why do i think boxes are
sexy? WHYYY OH WHY am i in love with a cow named Moochelle?
why am i in love with you?! :O is there something wrong with
Sporks are fun because they're two things! Awww thanks for thinking
I'm hot! Muffins are fun and taste yummy unless they have hidden
yucky stuff inside them. Boxes are fun! You can build things
with them and put things in them. Moochelle? I know a cow named
Moochelle! Maybe it's the same one! It's ok to love me, I love
you too! There is nothing wrong with being happy and loving
if i dug a hole from the north pole to the south
pole would i come out head first or feet first. Rotis
May 5/05 (It's 05/05/05
Answered by: Herbert
What does siege means?
When I am looking for what words mean, I go to this
website and it tells me! You can use it too! I like looking
up hug. "To press tightly especially in the arms."
So, what is it with this
place? I mean, DC was here and everyone asked about him, SAnimal
was here and everyone asked about him, now you're here and everyone
asks about you. Me and JCP are here and have been for longer
than you have... How come no one asks about us? WHAT DO WE WANT?
MORE MZEBONGA AND JCP!!! WHEN DO WE WANT IT? Next Tuesday! -
Poor Mzebonga and JCP! I like you both and would hug you lots
of times! I think we should have a huge party to celebrate how
much you two are loved by all of us! We can have cake and balloons
and more cake and dancing and games and more cake! I don't think
it should be Tuesday, a Friday would work much better so we
can stay up real late! Yay! A party!
I feed squirrels and birds in
my back yard. I have been seeing two squirrels eating by my
feeders and their fur has fallen off but their tail has fur
on it still. And they are itching really bad. What is wrong
with them I am worried. One of them comes up to me all the time
and I feed it seeds. Help. I am worried
Oh no, that sounds very bad! Maybe they have a disease or your
food is horribly bad for them! Does the food say anything about
bad for squirrels? Are your neighbors also feeding them, and
maybe feeding them nuclear waste? I saw that on a TV show once.
A mean old man was putting barrels of bad stuff in trees. Poor
squirrels! If you made them some sweaters or little jackets
of fur then maybe they would feel better.
You left poor Rotis's question
unanswered. You should apologize and tend to that right away.
Why is my life so hectic, Herbert?-bluemonkeyfearer
What? Oh no! <Hides face in shame> I'm so sorry! I will
go get it right now! How are you doing bluemonkeyfearer? You
should tell me your
address so I can send you a 'feel better' gift.
I can't come and give you a hug myself but I'll send something
else to make you feel better.
if i dug a hole from the north
pole to the south pole would i come out head first or feet first.
I'm so sorry Rotis! I didn't see it there at the bottom for
some reason, I think I had fur in my eyes! I hope you're not
mad at me. You would come out head first! Unless you made the
opening, then turned around and backed out of the hole. You
could be tricky like that!
Oh my sweet love herbert, it
makes my heart full of glee to see that red avatar next to my
answers in the forms I filled out for you. I am happy to be
insane. Now, for the reason I came to you. I was wondering what
would happen if you were in Asia, and all the sudden, a genie
came out of a can of tomatos. Is it a good genie? Or would it
taste like happiness? Would I taste it at all????~b_write
I'm glad you liked getting awards! I'm not the one who gave
out awards but I'm sure I would have given you lots if I had!
Maybe JCP will let me give out awards sometime! I'd give them
to everyone except for those who gave answers saying they hated
me and shoes. Wow, a genie! If the label on it has an expiry
date then you can tell right away if it's good or not! Sometimes
genies go rotten in the can and you have to throw them out!
I have never tasted a genie and I feel sad that I've never even
had a genie. I try to save up my pennies but then I see shoes
and have to buy them instead. Maybe we can save up together
and then we could taste genie together!
What if there was no gravity
on Earth? (assuming we still had some way to keep the oxygen
from floating off Earth) PyroPrincezz
That would be tricky! If there wasn't any though we'd all be
used to it and maybe we could fly! Wow, flying would be fun!
I could wag my tail and zoom around! I'd give away free trips
on my back and zoom people all over the place! You could come
flying with me PyroPrincezz! Hang on tight!
Did they brainwash one of my
best friends Chatlin when he went to a Juvenile School? Because
now he's acting normal...which is weird for him... err..maybe
its normal for him..no wait it's definetly weird for him because
he's normally acting weird..ok yeah just being confused but
ok yeah. Did they brainwash him?!?!? PyroPrincezz
Maybe they gave him lots of hugs and made him feel happy! That
would be a fun place to go. I'd like to go there. Maybe I could
open up my own school of hugging and then you can come visit
me! You and your friend could go around spreading the word of
the hug with me!
How do you grow good marajuanna
what do good marajuanna seeds look like
I have no idea! I only have a small closet and it's not big
enough to grow anything. Even if I could, it doesn't have a
window so there would be no light! I bet there are websites
out there to help you though. Maybe one day I'll have a window
and can grow things of my own. I just have to remember not to
hug them. I used to break my mom's plants by hugging them too
What is the point in making
me tie my hair up? What on earth does having your hair tied
up prove? Herrrbert!! -Stunt Fox
I agree with you Stunt Fox! You should have your hair any way
you want it! Maybe one day we can spike your hair and put colors
in it that wash out (so you don't get in trouble). We could
have fun and everything! Your hair could do stunts just like
Do you have any evil twins we
should know about? -Stunt Fox
I hope not! I will ask my mom to make sure though. I wouldn't
want to have an evil Herbert running around doing bad things
and then saying it was me. Maybe if I did, he would go around
giving kicks instead of hugs. That would be very evil!
What do you think about the
Harry Potter books? Will you buy Harry Potter and the Half-Blood
Prince for me when it is released? Please?-bluemonkeyfearer
(I'll come live in your closet if you do)
You're smarter than me because I haven't read any of them! I
have seen the movies though. If I buy it for you, will you then
read it to me? I'll be quiet and good while you read! I'll even
make popcorn if you like it! You can read a chapter each night
to me before we fall asleep in the closet.
Where is the most fun place
to go on vacation? -chris
Well I haven't been to lots of places but I would think that
anywhere warm and where people are full of hugs would be the
best place. I could wear some nice sandals and give out free
hugs in the streets! That would be the most fun ever!
herbert do you realize that
there are no bunches of sock bananas? somone should sew up some
for you so you can be a stereotypical monkey and i will wear
a lumber jacket and get a french accent so I can be a stereotypical
Wow Thathinguywhois! You are right, I've never seen bunches
of sock bananas! I'll ask my mom about that and see if she can
make me some. Then we can travel around the world and show everyone
how wonderful we are! I'd give out free hugs and you could stand
around saying "eh!" at everyone!
Answered by: Herbert
Are you a LOL?
You're silly! I'm not a LOL but I do LOL! If you don't know
what that means, it stands for Laugh Out Loud! I giggle more
than I laugh, so I GOL. I'm GOL right now!
Could you tell me how
to deal with a co-worker who thinks she's my boss and keeps
dumping her work on me? Hugging is not an option. – PRchick
Aw that's too bad PRchick! Maybe you should lay out all the
stuff you do each day and track which stuff she dumps on you
for a week. Then take it to your boss and politely tell your
boss that she is doing this. Also, make sure they lay out to
you who IS your boss and have them inform her that she ISN'T!
If that doesn't work then you're too good for that place and
should start looking for a better job. I'll write you a letter
and everyone will love you and they'll pay you tons of money!
Make sure you step on her shoes before you leave though. People
like her shouldn't have nice shoes on ever.
you, I pulled the head off my sock monkey and found socks stuffed
inside. But, how come when I pulled the head off my brother
I didn't find more brothers in there? Sincerely - j0eg0d
Dear j0eg0d, Why would you pull the head off your sock monkey?
That's very mean. I hope you sew it back on or else it's sock
monkey murder and I'd have to tell the world. Sock monkeys are
made better than your brother, which is why you need to sew
it's head back on! How mean of you to do that to a sock monkey!
Unless your sock monkey liked it. Then I guess it's ok. I guess.
You should maybe stop pulling the heads off of things.
Have you ever heard of the band
SJK? No me neither. What do you think SJK stands for? PyroPrincezz
No I haven't. Hmm maybe it stands for Some Jiggly Knives, Soft
Jumping Kitties, Some Jumping Karate, Silly Joke Killers, Sparkly
Jem Keepers, Sandra Just Keeps, Sock Jam Kilt. It could stand
for lots of stuff!
Umm do u know where I
can get some tea and crumpets? Our friend Petah Potta is visting
this summer - them brits like those sorta of things.
Petah Potta! That sounds like a funny name! Is he related to
that boy with the glasses and the cape thing? What a wonderful
cape that was. I wish I had a cape like that! I don't know where
you can get crumpets because I don't know what they are. There
is tea in the cupboard here though, I can steal it when Poptart
isn't looking and send it to you!
If a seagull flies over the
sea, and a bagel flies over a bay, where does a croisant fly
It would fly over a creek! Wow, I feel pretty clever that I
came up with that so quick! I didn't have to sit here for more
than a minute thinking about that! If bagels and croissants
flew it would be easier to get some breakfast in the morning.
There could be toaster trees and maybe some jam bushes too!
Wow, then outside would be full of yummy things and people wouldn't
Ok remember my question about
my friend being brainwashed by the Juvenile place? forget that
he's back to his annoying hyper irritating self!! How do I brainwash
him BACK to the way he was?!?!?!?!? PyroPrincezz
That's funny PyroPrincezz! Maybe you should give him some puzzles
to work on. I find they help make me calm down and they're fun!
It starts off with tons of little pieces of colored bits and
then when you put it all together right, it shows a big picture!
It's so fun! You should try it with him! If that doesn't work
than ice cream should help. It makes you sit down and spend
time eating it because it's so yummy! Mmmm I'd like some ice
How sad is it that while housesitting
I really missed computer related things--like the fast internet
connection, larger and clearer screen, and Photoshop. McDiablo
You're so spoiled McDiablo! Awww I'm just kidding. Fast internet
is what I was used to at JCP's but when I moved in with Poptart,
his connection is slower and it made me sad. Now I've gotten
used to it but I know what you mean. (I still secretly miss
it but don't tell.) Now that you're back you can have fun with
all your stuff and be happy! You should make fancy pictures
for me! Maybe one with my face so I can put it on every computer
I ever use! Do you think you could make me one? I'd be so happy
and I'd hug you for weeks!
going to Disneyland in 9 days. Should I bring Emerald with me?
I'm just afraid she'll get lost or attacked by Minnie Mouse.
Wow McDiablo! You get to do so much fun stuff all the time!
Emerald is so lucky that you are so fun! The last place Poptart
took me to was his room to make me clean up a mess I accidentally
made in his shoes. Can I come live with you two? I'll be nice!
I think she would be safe if you kept her with you on the plane
and don't let her play alone by the pool. Minnie Mouse better
not get near Emerald or I'll be very unhuggy and will have to
go give Minnie very mean spankings! (Sorry for the meanness
there but I want Minnie to know she has to be nice!) I hope
you have lots of fun there and please tell me about it when
you get back!
Answered by: Herbert
I'm going to Six Flags on Friday
the 13th. Scary I keep thinking that I'm going to get blown
up or something. Do you know of any good luck charms I could
easily get and bring with me Friday?
Friday the 13th! I bet that you'll be ok, I'll give you special
mental hugs to stop bad things from happening to you. You should
wear lucky socks or bring them with you. Or maybe some nice
shoes. Not everyone dies or has bad luck on that day or people
would pretend it's not there like in elevators. They pretend
there is no 13th floor but I've been outside and counted! I
see that 13th floor and they can't hide it!
one was able to go on a Slurpee Run with me tonight! What on
earth were they doing that was so 'important'? McDiablo
Oh no McDiablo! Good thing Emerald is always there for you.
I would have gone with you, why didn't you call me? I was at
home alone in my closet and trying to figure out the buckles
on the shoe I found outside and rescued yesterday. It's a lovely
black shoe with a big buckle but I'm not sure if it's a real
buckle or one of those fake buckles that are not a buckle but
just shaped like one. I could have brought it and then we could
figure it out together! I bet all your friends were off playing
with shoes and not wanting to share. They deserve slurpee spankings.
I don't know how that would work but it sounds funny! Slurpee
Do you enjoy the TV show "Family
Most times I do! There are some shows that are just too smart
for me and I don't understand what is going on. I like the monkey
that points at the older son, he makes me giggle! I bet that
monkey would be fun to be friends with once he got a few hugs.
Speaking of TV, why aren't there
more sock monkeys in shows? I mean, that'd bring the Nielson
ratings up for sure. McDiablo
I'd love to be on TV! I could just hang out and give guests
hugs! It'd have to be sock monkeys from this website though
so that they're fun monkeys like me! I'll have my own sock monkey
show and then all the sock monkeys are together! That'd be fun!
We could have hugging moments and everything! You could come
and be a guest!
have you ever thought about seeing things from the perspective
of a giant squid? especially one that was given or made for
itself a large floating tank so that it could be on land? what
would it think of us?thathinguywhois
Your questions are getting really good thathinguywhois! It must
be all those hugs I've given you to help you make sense! A tank
for on land is a great idea! If they had wheels that'd be even
better! They'd drive around all over and scare people or maybe
visit landmarks and take photos! I'd want to help the giant
squid if I could. Imagine the hugs it could give! I bet it would
love us and give us tons of hugs. If it hated us then it would
hug us to death, but what a way to go! Mmmm hugs from a giant
What is the correct way to prounce
"macabre"? I always thought it was ma-cob, but I've also heard
ma-ca-bray and ma-ca-bra. – PRchick
I don't know how to say it either! I looked it up online and
it says "Pronunciation: m&-'käb; -'kä-br&,
-b&r; -'käbr&" but that didn't help me at
all. There should be a sound clip so we know how to say it right!
When you find out then you should record it so that I know!
You could have PRchick's web site for pronnoucing words! I'd
be there every day to learn new words to say!
I haven't sent in questions
in a long time. Did you miss me? Anyhow, the other day, there
was a beer commercial and it said in each pack, there was a
coupon for 2 free steaks and then it said "no purchase necessary."
Does that mean we can walk into the liquor store, take the coupons
out of the cases or beer and then leave? -Hufflebunny
That has to be what it means or they wouldn't say it! You should
go get some and then we can all have a big BBQ! I'm so glad
you're back Hufflebunny! I'll give you hugs and everything!
I'll even help hand out the plates and stuff for people to use
and make sure everyone is having a good time. Free steak for
Why and how did pizza's originate
Pizza was first made by a domesticated tribe of sock monkeys
in lower Italy. Their love for cheese was equal with their love
for tomato sauce. <Giggles> Ok that was me being silly!
I don't know actually, but you should go find out from a website
somewhere and I'm sure it will tell you all you need to know!
should i bungee jump
It looks like fun! Make sure you get tied up properly! Can I
go with you?
are you gay are you a lesbian
I'm a sock monkey and I love everyone! Even you, unless you're
my freind adam has a
dildo should i get 1 if it is in the craze? cus he likes kodey
If you want one then get one! Don't do things just because your
friends do though. You need to buy stuff that YOU like! Maybe
you could get a used one and buy it cheap so that if you don't
like it, you can throw it away and not feel like you wasted
a lot of money.
WILL YOU EAT ME OUT
Only if we hug first! And we'd have to make sure we get along
and that you're all clean and everything. I don't want nasty
bits in my fur.
Answered by: Herbert
who manufactures the alien in
jar such as the third and last items on this page: http://nawtythings.com/halloween/decorations_alien1.html
I don't know but I've seen one of those before! It is scary
and weird and it jiggles when you shake it. Will you buy me
one? I'd like a hug monster actually, does anyone make those?
Maybe this year for Halloween I'll dress up as one!
wtf is this about?
You send in questions and then I answer them! Isn't that fun?
You've already asked one question, now you can ask another!
You could also send me socks and shoes. That would be lots of
Why do they make sweaters with
no sleeves? Doesn't that defeat the purpose of a sweater? –
I've never seen one of those PRchick, but it sounds very dumb!
What do they do with the sleeves? Maybe they try to make sleeve
monkeys. Sleeve monkeys! I wonder if sleeve monkeys are nice.
They should be. If I were a sleeve monkey then I'd demand the
sweater that I came from so I could sleep on it at night.
If all the continentds were
gone and the only thing left was you and your best friend tom
n god came n said tom can have babies n the 2 of u had to make
a new world would u become gay and do it or would u let the
world just end???
Well I'd have to see how Tom felt about making a new world.
If he doesn't want babies then I wouldn't want to force him
to. That would just be mean if I did. We would discuss it nicely
and then if he did want some then I'd make a nice crib for the
Why would you put porn with
you in it on the internet dont you feel exposed and just degreating??
What made you do this??? KJ
I like to share! And it's not really THAT bad. If you think
it is, you shouldn't be looking at it anymore! Plus I wanted
everyone to like me and give me free hugs. If you give me free
hugs every day for the rest of my life then I will promise never
to be in more porn pictures that go online!
Now, those Jack Asshole letters
may be weird, but I think they're a good idea. I mean, I used
to have assholes from neighbours and I'm kicking myself for
not leaving a rude letter on their doorsteps. Is there anyone
you'd like to send a rude letter/note to? McDiablo
Wow McDiablo, I bet they were pretty awful to have you hate
them enough to want to write letters. You could still write
them and even mail them! I could help you! What would you put
in your letter? I've wanted to write mean letters a few times
but by the time I found paper and a pen, the anger had left
me. You sould write those letters and scan them in so we can
all see them!
How does a svelt looking sock
monkey as yourself stay in shape? McDiablo
I'm not sure what svelt means but I'm hoping its a good thing!
To keep from getting fat I jog around the apartment every day!
It makes me feel better. Sometimes I chase my own tail around
too. That's always fun!
What is one magazine you would
subscribe to? McDiablo
Hmmm. It's been awhile since I've read one. Oh wait, MAD is
one isn't it? I like that one! It has funny cartoons. I don't
read the words though, they're confusing. If there was a HUG
magazine I'd want that one. If there isn't, then you and I should
make one! We could travel the world and have articles about
hugs and everything!
do monkeys really fly out my
Do they? That would be fun! Well maybe not late at night when
you're sleeping or maybe when you want some alone time to play
in the closet but other times it'd be a lot of fun!
Why is kristy here? Why is Mr.
Derioun talking to someone else? Why are people in general just
stupid? Why do i think YOU (HERBERT!) are hot? I WANT YOU! I
LOVE YOU! ash
Kirsty? I don't see her, maybe she's hiding. Sometimes people
do that to me and then I have to run around looking for them.
It's not always fun though. Sometimes they pretend they're hiding
but they've actually gone home. Maybe Mr Derioun is talking
to people who are hiding too! I don't know why people are stupid
though, if I did then I would figure out how to cure them with
hugs! Awww you're making me blush! You should come over and
hang out with me in my closet and I can you give you hugs!
Where do you live Herbert??
How old are you?? Are you married?? If not want to marry me???
We can have bunches of lovin's and childern??? And hate our
in-laws together?? Baby Gurl!!
I live in Ottawa! It's the capital of Canada! I'm old enough
to play with others in my closet and no I'm not married! We
don't know each other to get married but we can be friends and
hang out until we do want to marry! Do you like shoes? We could
put them in piles and play with them together instead of all
that hating in-laws!
how much wood would a woodchuck
chuck if a woodchuck could chuck would?
If the wood chuck was Chuck Wood then I would think he could
chuck a lot of wood! Maybe he would have a wood chucking party
and we could all chuck wood.
Hey Herbert, things have gotten
completely out of control politicaly in Canada. Since you live
in Ottawa could you and some of your sock monkey friends take
over the House of Commons? I know you and your friends could
do a much better job than the Fn 'Tards that are NOT running
it now! > hug & and a pat on the butt for you ! - MariE
Aww thanks MariE! Your vote is important to me! <Giggles>
I could go on TV and say fun things and then make people hug!
What a fun job that would be, Prime Minister Herbert! That boring
government channel on the tv would be fun to watch then!
If you had to choose, hugs or
tail rubs, which one would you choose to go without for the
rest of your life? Capt. Quebec
Oh no Capt. Quebec, that would be horrible to not be able to
do either! I don't even want to think about it!
Ich denke, daß Sie reizvoll
sind ! Wurde Sie mögen eine Socke Affe-Endstückunebenheit?
Hi Johann! I don't know what you've typed because I only know
one language. I really should go to sock monkey school and learn
more. I feel dumb for only knowing one language! There are so
Answered by: Herbert
is there anyother way to masterbait
then ur hand ? if yes tell me
I have a tail! You should get a tail too. It really is wonderful.
It can grip things, poke into things and everything! <Giggles>
My tail is my favorite thing. It fits into shoes too. Mmmm tail
in shoes. Mmmmmmmmm.
BRIEF HISTORY OF MIRRORS PLEASE
For a long time there were no mirrors and then someone made
some. Yay! I'm glad they did. Mirrors are shiny and fun! You've
always got a friend when you've got a mirror.
what color is your poop
Today it was a light brown! I don't know what I ate to make
it that color but it was fun and creamy. Don't worry, I didn't
put my paws in it or anything, I'm not like that!
where do babies come from
They come from all over the place! Baby squirrels, baby chipmunks,
baby humans, baby trees, baby monkeys, baby toads and baby sock
monkeys! It's great!
why doesnt anyone talk abuot
lucipher the Devil on this cite god stingks ps.im gonna rip
out your fluff tonight Herbert na im just kiding
You had me feeling sort of funny in my tummy there for a minute!
I don't know much about Lucifer but see I know his name to spell
it right! You can come over and spank me or play with my tail
if you want instead of ripping out my fluff!
hi herbert i just moved
back home and i want to show everyone how amture i am now so
what do you think? from staver
Hi staver! You should wear a suit and tie! Anyone who wears
that looks very mature! One time I wore a tie and I was called
sir! It felt so good to be called that but then I giggled and
sirs don't giggle so then I had to run away.
what did you do this weekend?
I didn't do anything fun but I bet youdid!
Sure I had a bit of fun! I sorted through my shoes to make sure
that all of them were still there. Sometimes they go missing
because I forget to bring them back to the closet when I'm done.