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what if you woke up one day and discovered you had superhuman powers?

id disguise myself as a purple croc' and eat steve irwin- pizza man dan marino

I will use my super-duper human powers to move the planets and arrange them as bowling pins and use the Earth as a bowling ball, or I could just throw the Earth into the sun just to see what happens. FUN!- DZ

I would start a massive marijuana farm and make all of the plants invisible with my powers so I would never be found out- Hailey

I'd do something stupid like call up a friend and go to their house and fly around or whatever and tell them not to tell anybody so I wouldnt be caught and probed and put on the news, but they'd blab anyway and then I'd be forever harassed by scientists with little wires they want to attach to my forehead and they'd make me do stuff like save children from burning buildings and other such wastes of my time.- FartMonkey

I'd make myself some hot coffee and drink it while sitting on the balcony watching my city in flames. Burn my precious, burn. I would then move to Columbia, drinking the world's coffee supplies, the rest of the people can go screw themselves, like they'd do anything to help me. Puh! Besides, people are selfish and if you do one thing for them they expect you to help them all the time. "Help us!" Yes, I think I'm doing them all greater favor by watching them struggle like little ants under a magnifying glass.- ferretchick

I'd kill you all!!! ALL OF YOU!!! There's a new boss in town and it's me!- Mzebonga

ask who/whatever gave them to me,,,now what??- rayyo77

YESS! I CAN FINALLY TURN ON THE SHOWER WITH MY SUPER POWERS!- u smell like lemons

Would we use it for good or bad - Rooster

i would use them to take over the world!!!!!!!!!!- jim bibble

well depending on the powers, i would most likely abuse them... and then abuse you... and then abuse them some more. i'm not above using my powers, or other people, for my own personal gain. and fuck off, they're mine.- EmprissNikon

i would make it possible for me to snap my fingers and be in a completely different place..of my own choice of course. i would also lower the price of cd's and movies.- GeT_KiNkY!!

I would devour the land of milk and honey.- Racoon Man

It’ll be a tremendous relief...26 yrs...I’m not adopted after all...whew!***leigh

If i woke up, and i discovered i had human powers, first i would...hmm...make some grilled cheese...because w/ out my supper cool super powers, i dont know how to make grilled cheese. And...WOW...that was quite frankly the BEST grilled cheese i have ever had. So i decide to make a grilled cheese franchise. I think i will call it "the fried ice cube" ahhh...i like it...So i sell grilled cheese for a living, because im great, and i have super cool super powers =)- JimBoBob=)

I would use them to save the tomatoes from motherly bondage...*wait* i can do that anyway...- Rocco the Great

superhuman powers to me would be a penis..in that case i'd pee on everything and everyone- Vanessa

kill the masses- antisanta

i would use my powers to rid the world of evil whackness and teach these mofo's how to really run things. then i would live it out like those types in that martix flick series flying though the skies and slapping suckers silly in slow motion and watnot. i'm telling you shit will be wicked. i'll snatch up all the dope for myself. have villages under water and giving salsa lessons on the moon yeAH!- dr. kryptonite

I already have superhuman powers: 1.the superhuman ability not to get drunk: I can down 27 Bud's and drive to my job at Walmart without hitting a single predestrian. 2. superhuman taste: I can taste the difference between pepsi and coke, and can also distinguish a red m&m from a brown m&m. 3.Lungs of steel: the superhuman ability to smoke 17 bongs and 40 cigarettes a day and not be dead. - Ass Gnome

i'd kill everyone and fly to the moon- SiNiSTaR

I'd definately use them. Depends on what it is though or how many I had. The power of choice would telepathy, I like to read your minds. Well, if I just woke up and didn't have the powers the night before, I don't think I'd realize it first thing. It would probably hit me in the shower. Not a good place to discover a superhuman power first thing in the morning, that would definately screw with my head for a while. But let's be realistic here, I'd probably just pass it off as a hallucination from the previous nights' escapade of drugs.- Christophe

i'd go over to iraq and kill all the stupidfuckingbitchsuckingfuckers then, if there was time left, i'd swing down to africa and kill all of the stupidfuckingbitchsuckingfuckers there. i'd be killing a lot of world leaders but im the end it will be better that they didn't have a chance to breed all their nasty genes into the rest of the world. and i'd kill all people who didn't emediatly love this site...... (yes, i'm sucking up)- irish psycho

well i would just SHIT my stall RIGHT THERE and then i'd prance till i could prance no more and then my superhuman powers would let me prance more and more until i could prance no more...- -spanky the wonder horse

I would use my super powers to minipulate people into buying me a years supply of orange soda and gummy worms.- Phishie

I would fly around and shoot at people with my "lazor" vision and i would get my room clean by a snap of my finger. oooo so cool. - CowfromSpace

gah i tried telling all of you that i already do! event hough you dont agree i still think making the best omelete imaginable is one of the worthiest superhuman powers ever! so bah im fighting crime somewhere else!- your grandmas moth balls

i would make a makeshift cape using a bath towel and fly over the city nude, except for the bath towel.i would then do every thing i do on a normal in the nude cuase no one can do jack shit about it.i would basicly let my powers go to waste. all i want is to do things in the nude without being disturbed.- demonboy"_"

I'd think, 'What the heck was in my Slurpee?' - McDiablo

I make a costume, put on the costume, and burn it. While I'm wearing it, it would hurt because I have superhuman powers. I have always wanted to be on fire. What about you?- weirdDAR

i would destroy all the sucky singers in the world and all the people who supported them.- irish psycho

The first thing I would do is levitate right out of my bed like in The Exorcist and then I would take my first superhuman morning dump straight through my pajamas without leaving any skidmarks. Then my superpoop would float neatly off to the toilet and I would use my telekinetic will from the remote location of my bedroom to make the toilet flush itself. I would look through my refrigerator through my wall and the door using my x-ray vision and will some breakfast to disappear and reappear into my bloodstream. Rather than clothing myself at this point, I would simply shape-shift into a giant, robotic, reptilian Death King. As the lights, propellers, spikes and fangs shot out of my awesome mass, splintering my house and several properties surrounding me like cheap dollhouses, the icy blanket of my shadow would reach past the perimeters of my immediate wrath, chilling the blood of those puny humanoids in my way. Animals, of course, would sense my approach in plenty of time to flee, thus being spared. I would stomp all over suburbs and shopping malls first thing. Then I would reach into the mansions of the biggest assholes in the world, with my steel lobster claws, and gobble them all up like candy. Being yet unsatisfied in my hunger, and further agitated by the attempt of my stubborn snacks to shred the lining of my throat in horror as they are overwhelmed by crushing waves of peristalsis, I would wander back in time over a historical buffet of assholes, whom had not met with justice before their natural deaths, and eat them too. Removing the shoulders of asshole giants from the space-time continuum works as a sort of antacid for omnipotent, people-eating monsters, of which I would be King, by eliminating the the foundations on which present assholes exist. So, why not just eat the assholes from the past first, and avoid the heartburn? Well, like all things that are bad for us, assholes taste good, so I have to eat new assholes first so that I can yield a greater harvest. Anyway, that's just a big tangent. After my snack, I would probably start to feel kind of horny and start humping the planet until I passed out. The crash of my post-coital, exhausted super-body against the ground would catapult the planet out of orbit, causing it to fling into the sun, and then I would awake into the next layer of consciousness in some other sort of corporeal manifestation and begin my apocalyptic ritual all over again, forever.- Enfante Terrible

id use em!- Keli_x_James

I'd use them to get to Flordia and look up Demonboy. Together we could bring the world to it's knees. After that? Oh, then we take a short break for a "bit" of relaxation.- Naked Fairy

id discover the cure for cancer. i would bring world peice. i would aslo solve starvation problems in the world... HAH NOT id haev xray vision to peer at girls boobies, id start wars, but id win them all, and id haev sex 24/7.- der1331

 
 

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