Results for May 2008
Awards given out by JCP

There is a large purple hippo in your bedroom and it's thrashing around in a drunken rage.
How do you lure it out and back into it's own apartment without having it cause more damage or causing it to call the cops and have you arrested for assaulting a hippo? And do you use cotton candy, rubber bands or glitter in any way?

i take some cake and put peices of it all the way leading out my appartment back to his appartment because everyone knows that everything on the planet cant resist CAKE- caketown

I can't talk about that night while the police investigation is still in progress.- Not a Lame guy!

Good Answer Awardmuch like the last drunken animal in my room, i get him out by asking for a commitment, i tell him i wanna be his girlfriend and hold his hand and call him my snuggle bear...he'll be out of there in two seconds flat and i don't have to open a new tube of glitter...works every time!- sharia

First off, how the fuck did a purple hippo get into my room...I can barely fit in my room! Anyway since it's there I'd slay the beast. Mmmmmm Hippo, them's is good eats !- Poptart

lure it with another beer- bunteri

A paper-mache beer keg made up to look like an opposite sex hippo. No glitter, candy or rubber bands used.- japes

Assuming that this hippo is probably hungry hungry, I'd use some of that cotton candy as incentive for getting the hell out of my apartment. Hopefully that will be enough to draw it out of its mindless drunken rage and I won't have to hurt it in any way that could get me arrested.- lame nickname

Good Answer AwardGive it a bong. Sometime later point out you have no snackies in your place and there in a minimart on it's way home- twatcher

cotton candy to cover my breast and glitter because shiny thing call everyones attention, i would try to hit on the hippo!!!he would ask me to his place and id say no!!!- nicelegsnicetitsbiglips

Me likey hippo, Me likey hippo.- iamzbob

i am very strong so i can tie hippos dick with rruberband and colour it with glitters. i ll use the candy on a she hippos pussy . this ll make the hippo crazy and he ll run outta ma room.- Lameloser

Good Answer AwardWait a minute...that's where all my vodka went?!?! Great...so much for having a friend during those lonely nights at home. Well at any rate, I'd probably create a fake female hippo out of cotton candy, rubber bands and glitter. I'd than sprinkle booze all over it so the purple hippo thinks it's a drunk just like him. I'd get one of my stupid friends to get inside of this fake purple hippo and slowly lure it back to it's own apartment. I'll of course be filming all of this, both for blackmail and hilarity purposes. I'm totally going to take over Youtube baby!- Alyra

Good Answer AwardPor supuesto, lo atraería con el cotton candy. Todos sabemos que a los hipopótamos les encanta. Se lo mostraría a lo lejos, y cuando se empezara a acercar, ocultaría el cotton candy detrás mío, mientras camino hacia atrás y lo llamo con un dedo, diciendo -Ven, Hipo, buen chicho, buen chico...- Tiraría entonces el cotton dentro del apartamento del hipopótamo, y él desesperado se avalanzaría. Ahi es cuando aprovecho que está ocupado comiendo, que le sujeto las patas traseras con una bandita elástica. Su sorpresa será tanta que facilmente podré sujetar (con la misma banda) sus patas delanteras. Para mayor seguridad, luego reajustaré con otra bandita. Entonces alejaría el cotton de su hocico, donde no lo pudiera alcanzar de ninguna manera. Y la brillantina la utilizaría pintandole las pezuñas, sólo para humillarlo. Otro poco lo usaría yo para sentirme bonita. Luego de dejarlo maniatado (patiatad...) saldría de su apartamento, cerraría con llave, tapiaría la puerta, y llamaría a Bril ltda. para que arregle el caos en mi cuarto.- Mariana

I would never have guessed you knew how me and my ex split up but damn that accurate. Instead of luring it out, I just left. I didnt get arrested and the damage was no longer my problem.- my_lame_nickname

Good Answer AwardThe thing about purple hippos (especially large ones) is they can't resist abstract works of art. Using the cotton candy, rubber bands and glitter, I make the most fantabulous piece of abstract art any canvas has ever had the pleasure of holding. After luring the hippo out of my room, I summon a unicorn (yes, I can do this, don't question it) to take the purple hippo to its true home, but not before lecturing it about the dangers of alcohol poisoning.- McDiablo

you have to call Barney, it's the only way out of that mess.- ok

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