Depends on the person, really.- Windy

I've always been annoyed by that hollow incinsere greeting that nobody ever really means. I usually reply "What the F*** do you care anyway, why even say that if you don't mean it?"- LittleJohn

"Fine and you?" works for me. I don't give a shit that they dont give a shit. Cause I don't give a shit about them. - Bella

make things up for conversation purposes- waldo

I usually say "surviving so far". - reddfrogg

Actually, i caress their nipples. - buttface

Usually I ask, "is this just a rhetorical question?" or I say, "better than you'll ever hope to be."- Cessna

BAD BUTTS- THE BUTT

I say Iv'e got brain cancer, aids, and am being sued for one million dollars by a neigbor who slipped on the sidewalk in front of my house. They usually reply "Oh thats nice or just walk on by as if I hadn't said anything other that fine thanks because the bastards never listen for an answere to that question anyway.- little member

yes- ergott

sometimes I'll reply in backwards speech, "?gniod ssa ruoy no liob gniretsef taht si woh .sknaht , enif" to ascertain if they merit the revelation of my true condition.- Cessna

Usually the regular "Fine" or "Tired" because it's pretty obviously small talk unless it's coming from someone who actually cares about my life.- Mel

obligatory reply- sanju

I usually reply with assorted forms of "good".- NIKKI

I generally just say fine, but throw something in there to entertain myself. Favorites include, "Fine, except my dad died", "Fine, like you, sugar", or bursting into tears and protesting their jabs at my virginity. Any and all work nicely. - BlatantlyIgnorant

I usually say "Do you really care?"- Dirty Dingus McGee

If they ask and I can tell they don't really give a damn I'll make something up.- vin

No- danandmei

HOnest reply- MCR

I usually say the boring, "I'm fine", "Not too bad/shabby" or "Pretty good." I should just start saying random things to people to see if they're paying attention. "How are you doing?" "Just peanut butter, thank you." Ohh, that would make a monotonous day at work FUN.- McDiablo

Make shit up.- Co3

I tell them murdurous and then ask them if they like life. When they give me a strange look, start backing away slowly and reply that they like life very much indeed, I start mumbling under my breath, laughing nervously, and keep staring at them. Then they leave me alone which is better then them being polite and pretending to care because I hate talking pretentious fools even if it is impersonal formalities.- If I only had a navel....