Results for December 2005

What if aliens came to earth right NOW, made themselves look like xmas trees and sat in homes everywhere collecting information? Would you be safe?

im sure aliens have better things to do - poo

...i am an alien - brown_stuff

Yeah. I'm a non-conformist* and don't have Christmas trees in my home. *sad, lonely, skint cunt - Catherine

Yep - I'm brain Dead - scrote

Sure, my mum would protect me, she's a civil engineer, she'd just say: "HEY YOU FUCKING ALIENS! YOU FUCKING HURT MY SON AND I'LL BUILD A ROAD ON YOU BITCHES". This is why JCP and my mother would become firm friends.... - George

They're only collecting information, right? I mean, it's not going to be like Christmas '99 where Uncle John pissed on the Christmas tree and electrocuted himself on the lights, is it? - Mzebonga

hahaha YES I would...I don't have an Xmas tree...or any decorations at all. You're all SUCKERS muahahahaha SUCKERS I tell you !! - Poptart

yeah, they better take me with them, I don't belong here! - Russ Dire

yrs - fnurkus artvark

Yes I would be safe because I don't have a christmas tree. Wait.. would these be real trees or just the fake ones? If it's the fake ones then they deserve it for having shitty fake trees. If it's the real ones then they deserve it for using a whole tree just to hang decorations on. Man christmas sucks balls. - Turtle

I'd make them watch Saturday night television. The horror will send them scurrying back to their home planet. - Mzebonga

No. - hippiedad69

So far, I use a old pizza box to be festive and on occasion a pizza guy. - Ace

Well, if by 'collecting information' you mean 'spying on me when I'm naked', then I don't think I'd be okay with that. If they're just here to hang out, maybe try some shortbread cookies, and destroy all the X-mas CDs in my house--HELL YEAH, they can live here forever! - McDiablo

Yes. this year, we decorated the vaccuum cleaner in place of the tree. Therefore, a Christmas Tree where there once was none would raise eyebrows. Although, this also depends on the eggnog to non-eggnog ratio. - WingNut

Yes - josue

Yes, because if all they can do is change into xmas trees, I would actually feel bad for them cuz we throw them in the dumpsters with our trash afterwards. - b_write

Yes, but the aliens would be in danger. - The infamous Jefferson Rottweiler

yes - Maude Lynne

Sure I would. For now, anyway. We don't have our Christmas tree up, and even when my brother puts it up, I'll be avoiding it anyway. >_> ..... <_< ....*_* Mu ha ha - bluemonkeyfearer

no but so long as they remain tinselly with pretty coloured lights on them and sometimes small chocolate things, then i think that's a fair trade-off. Collecting information in exchange for xmas fun and decoration. ANyway, if this did happen you'd know - you'd go to eat a choc off the tree and the tree would either cry out in pain, arrest you for harassment, or check with you whether you had a nut allergy. - Caffeine Cruise

NO!!! They're reading our minds!!! unless you cover the "trees" with tin foil to block out their signal, you're not safe. Don't trust the trees!!! - idontmindthesunsometimes

yea cuz our tree is fake. and white. no alien is fucking white and made of plastic. bitches..! - renae

no they would catch me masterbating - spike

Collecting information? Collecting information for what? To take over the world using christmas trees? Or just to see how retarded the human race is? Or maybe it is because they want to become me!!! AHHHHH DONT TAKE ME!!!! I LIKE MY LIFE! Wait a I don't. You can have my life aliens! I'll go and live a secret life as a crazy person in a mental home so I can let them all out. - PyroPrincezz

Well the aliens would have to sit there until xmas was over then get chopped up for fire wood. yeah I'd be safe. - TRIpod

For the moment. The real question is how do the aliens handle the after Christmas tree slaughter? How do they escape being landfilled, burned or tossed into a bay to make a reef? - Balloons R Fun

Depends if they are nice aleins or the kind that stick rods up your ass. - nick

Why not? If they thing humans are so interesting go for it. I think the answer would lie in what humans do to those "xmas tress" after the holidays are done and the aliens who did collect info like that. Hello chipper or fire.. hahaha.. they aren't going to be safe I would assume - ~Jeepster

Sure, I don't have a christmas tree here. How'd you like eh? HAH! I jizzed on your bonfire there didn't I! - George's Clone - George

well what KIND of x-mas trees? The kind you "assemble" at home, or the kind that were actually growing somewhere, OR the one that you went out with the saw and cut down. But if the tree were and alien and you cut it down, would the tree scream? There are too many unanswered questions! AHAHHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!! - Katoid

yes - lois

of course i do have an XMAS tree... (mom get rid of the tree now! its a conspiracy!!! aliens are just invading our homes to get information!!!) - l2o0aLo0

hell, i'm paranoid already...don't make it worse. - colour-me-psycho

ya cuz i dont celebrate xmas with trees...just lights- blackwallstreet4life

Of course not, they'd be leeching my innermost thoughts, desires and beliefs out of my ears in a matter of minutes. Poor things. - Fish

as long as they dont steel my stuff im ok. - Nonameloser

It depends are they mexican? - I was that other guy

no.yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yesno.yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes no yes ha ha i control you no whith this. - its me agian

Of Course, I've been communicating with them for 5 years, and I've even befriended some. I shouldn't be worried, but that doesn't mean the rest of the world can rest peacefully...especially those who doubt that Aliens sieze to exist, they're in for it bigtime. - Zelda

You idiot, what the hell do you think you're doing. My xmas tree can see my computer screen from where it is. I had my suspicions about the tree but we shouldn't have let them know were onto them. Anyway the alien shot out of the tree leaving just a pile of pine needles on the floor. Not only do I have to buy a new xmas tree, but the human race is at risk as we now have no idea what the aliens will disguise themselves as next. - Bumface

they're xmas trees.... - pancho

Of course! Our Christmas tree is made of plastic and we've had it for ten years. We'd know if any aliens messed with our trees! - Zaqim

Yes I would be. I don't do the tree thing because it makes me cry to think of them being killed for me. Their corpses in my room as I decorate them, that's pretty fucking sick isn't it. - *silverfish*

Most likely. How could aliens hate humans we have excellent food. I honestly wouldn't be surprised though...... - Jenn

hell yes because i burn my christmas tree after christmas so it doenst really matter now does it? - jo yama

what do mean right now. they've been doin that since the invention of aluminium foil. why do you think we put tinsel on the tree. its not for decoration. the aliens from uranus use it as a radio transieving device. - iamzbob

yes, i get along with all kinds of people, right JCP??? - kellykins

make an electrical fire and put it out before the house burned down but made sure that the tree was sufficiently burned - forgotten name

no - trulte

I'd be no worse off one way or the other. - Swine

Most probably... I think Aliens who seem to have the intelligence to turn themselves into christmas trees wouldn't really be interested in my life they would most probably think that the Television was the most dominant life-form on the planet. - Rhys

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