: November 2004

There are rumors circulating about a disease that is carried by an evil breed of sock monkey. Knowing there is a community of them next door, what do you do to make sure they're not diseased?

Make my son eat them. - membersonly

I'd send Emerald over (wearing a gas mask, of course) to seduce the monkeys. If she notices any fungal matter on them or creepy crawlies then she'd run out and play a New Kids on the Block song really loudly. I mean, I used to love New Kids on the Block, but once those monkeys hear Joey MacIntyre wailing on "Please Don't Go Girl", that disease on them will whither and die in teeny tiny screams.- McDiablo

shoot the shit out of them- Got Faygo

I'll take them all to the sock monkey doctor, while I wear a protective suit, but they'll think Im taking them to be murdered and proceed to scratch my eyes out and almost kill me, leaveing me to drag along behind them, until we finally get to the doctor, who gives them lollipops for a job well done.- monkeeskittles

I would deploy my uber-SockMonkey probing device and investigate their quarters with the use of a mini-cam, paint brush and a tooth-pick. - Mort

Napalm.- Sven the Masseur

One by one, have a little old lady ask them for help across a busy street. If the monkey pushes her into oncoming traffic, it is evil and therefore a carrier. Nothing a little hairspray and a lighter couldn't cure.- Lynx

Burn them. BURN THEM ALL!!! HAHAHA!- Superman Dave

well.. first I see what the side effects of this disease and see if it's lethal or not.. and If it is.. I go get fluff samples somehow of each and every sock monkey and test if they're positive for the disease or not... and if so I kill them all while wearing full body armor...- SG*

actually I think I've come down with something....DAMN HERBERT! a rash about mein groin, headaches and an uncontrolable urge to masturbate ALL THE TIME I'm even doing it as I type...with one hand DAMN HERBERT - Poptart

It's only rumour just ignore it and you probably won't die.- No thanks

go and ask them- andrew

I would need to test them by using flames. If a sock monkey has the disease it will also make them fireproof. If the sock monkey doesn't catch on fire it will need to be killed instantly. and if the sock monkey doesn't have the disease it will peacefully burn to death.- Fredward

I give them all a anal probe- JonTrodd

I;ve always lived life the boring way... i'd go myself to see if they were, and if they WERE i'd get infected and we'd do the whole 'dead alive' thing and have a ball.- SiNiSTaR

"Evil breed of sock monkey"??? All sock monkeys are wonderfully evil. Why do I want to make sure that they are not diseased? If they are, then I WANT to be diseased too. Maybe I can go play with their tails and get the disease, and maybe then I will turn into a sock monkey, too.- bluemonkeyfearer

shoot em all- mascarahero

kill all of them because then it wouldnt matter.......- boobookittyfck

Lick them and see if I die. If I become horribly ill, then I'll continue licking them because it has always been my life's wish to lick a community of sock monkeys and hey, they can't do any more damage right? Heehheeee heee I just Know I'm getting a butt for this one.- Nelson

Doubble wrap it.-me

Wrap my entire body in 6 layers of cling wrap, confine myself entirely to the cleaning cupboard and take regular intravenous doses of draino and bleach to kill any evil little bastards might be circulating in my bloodstream - Fish

It's not a disease, it's lurve, baby... Oh yeah... Real nasty sock monkey lurve. I'm gonna get me some luvin' Holy fuck?!? Did I say that? I've got the disease too. Quick, kill me or something!- Mzebonga

Rape them all so that if they have any diseases, they are from me.- Mantis

rape them and wait 7 days...if your still alive...theyre ok- *star*

JESUS CHRIST NOT THE BLOODY SOCK MONKEYS!!!!!! AND THEY'RE LIVING NEXT DOOR?? WHY DID NOBODY TELL ME? I dont know what to do to make sure that they are'nt diseased, but i know how to make sure i dont get diseased. I'M F**KIN' MOVING!- NoobyFop

Use my cat as bait to get bitten and then sit back and watch the show- Jules

So i hear..my next door neighbours are already infected with gingerpubedness...but, i would be very worried so i would capture one of them, bring them to my lair of experimentation (bedroom) and tickle-torture them and dangle cheese just out of their reach until they break and confess their diseasness...**babybel**

Get my armed Terrorist Guerella Millita to come and destroy them- Dragon_Bomber

Lock them up.- Dementia

Insert waffles into my every known orifice,(Protection) then... cavity searches. - SkyofStLuke

Move out or better yet, Scream.- yosoydame

I'd send them crates of poisoned bananas with a note that says "cure" on it. - j0eg0d

(for BAD spelling) well u cant kill a sock munkeh so id wate for them to stop porning eatchother and there asleep then take a blud sample to test by a purple forenzioc thing n then cry cos i cant anser these questions hard - dark-angle

throw a bomb through their window- samsamsam

kill them- profdunn

i care nothing about disease. and sincr those sock monkeys are evil, i would smoke them up.- freak_ninja

Have unprotected sex with everyone of them with or without the help of date rape drugs and if it does not respond to interbreding, no std's are found, then I will make an new disease from chickadees and mix it with peacock brains and feed it to them, saying its an cure. This mixture will be a sure promise for the extinction, as the news gets ahold to the reports of unknown causes of death to all naive insanedomain viewers and elderly woman who thought a sockmonkey would be a nice present for her grandchildren. After millions of deaths in a few months and the regular hoo hah, the bewildered and terribly interested scientists with swirl a glass full of botulinal neurotoxin then look out a window, scream "monkeys!" and drink the fluids... ah well, causing suicidal death with a note saying "the evil sock monkeys... the evil... are sock monkies, lemons are not really good wifes". This will broadcast and relieve everyone in an avenaging massacre upon the evil sock monkey's... who had grown an immunity due the mixture of date rape drugs and nitro citren... and the animal innerds, which I consumed too. But the idiotic humans, ya see, they kill the cure along with the cause and unknowingly disrespect my property by smashing my hobbit gnome while rampaging there beautiful modest victorian household, which fred and ted worked so hard on decoratating. Um, I think I've gone a bit off topic anyways, I'll investigate by eithar pie offering or ramped sexually premiscuity. Both Sounds good eithar way... or maybe I'll eat the pie and the sex. Hm, yes much better, but its highly unlikely I'd survive if they were so I'd bring along a specimen in the dark for them to touch in that entartaining way... Hm, *distracted in imagery*. Um, yea, sex and feeling, and the pleasentries... er... Down Primal slut, Down! - SteamRisingLicks

I'd eat thier babies, and make sock coats out of the rest.- Venomous

WTF?- Spidey44