The carnival is coming to town!
8/29/05 - by drunkennewfiemidget -

Every time the Midway, Carnival, Circus, or in Ottawa's case, the SuperEx come to town, everyone gets their panties in a knot.

Everyone flocks to the rides, the games, and various other meaningless attractions, not worth the money you fork out to get on them.

And has it occurred to anyone that carnies are fucking creepy?!

A few days ago, I went to Ottawa's SuperEx compliments of the boyfriend of a friend of my girlfriend's employee free pass ticket.

I watched as people handed money over like lemmings to these people in exchange for rides, or chances at winning crappy quality, or near impossible-to-win prizes.

I made a startling revelation during my visit there, however, that I have come to share with you.

I'd always wondered why you had to buy tickets to get on rides at these things. I figured maybe it was because having a carnie handle cash was difficult. Maybe it was to keep the money centralised. Maybe it was for fear of theft.

NO! The reason you buy tickets at a central location is because it adds another layer of anonymity, so that you don't think about the fact that you just handed someone with a grade 3 education, and more diseases than IQ points six bucks in exchange for a 3 minute ride on a ride you could have duplicated in your basement by running around in circles for 30 seconds.

I'm moderately sure hookers & blow would be a cheaper option at this point. And hookers & blow is something everyone in the family can enjoy!

Oh, did I mention that carnies are fucking creepy?!

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