Systematic is kinda weird.

My nose is itchy.

I'd like to put pickles in my meatloaf.

That's right idiot... this is the one door... but you want the other... that's why we put signs...

That is the progress report on how things go.

Demoted to gross

Damn all the stupid people.   Can't they read signs???

We are not the training room... go away.

She pretends to be the girl you want her to be, but the truth always comes out. RUN

You can't hear me cuz I'm not saying anything.

He ordered a beer, just to be cool. It didn't work.

bring bring me back or something... ya know.... HELLO.... ya... something like that... why not? oh. call 3262. 
Uh huh... why not? easier to call... alright. 
Alright well this is it... it's alright... sap the money to ginger... what's that? 
Yes. Um... oh yea... is nine inches? it's easier to support. i'm only kidding. 
it's the judgement. 4 cds. Who is? it's the only fix. yep. yep. cya.

You see yourself as dark, evil, and blending.

You think of death as bright, annoying, and loud.

Rotting carcasses in the sun are always fun

Chitz is the pitz.

Colors blend too much sometimes.

%). That's what I thought. 50, only screwed up.  Can't you just page like everyone else???

And nobody wants jerks as friend... ask me... I should know!!! ahahahahahahahahahaaaa... isn't that ironic?

Cha laa... and stick a straw in it.

I'll pull it. I've always wanted to do that.

What the hell???!!!!

Damn! Here comes that bald guy!

Elephants are not made to hop up and down.

I would like to go home and sleep till I died.

My cat plays with everything.  My feet are toys.

Once there was a rock.  It just laid there. WOW

My hand has fingers attached to them.

Since I dislike them both fate makes me spend hours with them.

Chuckleman to the rescue of a really bad joke!!!

If I kicked your fender, it wouldn't break.

I guess you could call her a scrawny, flat-cheasted, nerdy, snobby, fuck-up.   I guess.

Stupid people arguing over email.  They don't realize that it's being sent to 'ALL'

I nearly hit a guy today with my car.  I laid on the horn, he did a funny dance and got outta my way.

The bird in the office is squawking her head off.  SHUT UP STUPID BIRD

What the hell is 'apple pie and motherhood' supposed to mean???

Don't be lookin at me with a fishy eye!

Liquid may migrate and if it does... heaven help us!

If I were her, I'd tell her to get her stupid dying ass out of the barn and
start acting like an adult instead of the spoiled brat she is currently acting like.

I'm not a bloody fool! Damn! No bloody fools here! Ya hear me sonny boy? NO BLOODY FOOLS HERE

I don't see the need for feet on the dashboard.

what's that? you want me to kick your ass with that boot? ok...

did i mention that your ass sticks like jello?

THAT'S IT... everyone dies.

No way, spank your OWN monkey

Balloons bad for environment!

No matter which way you look... they always get you from behind.

 Who slapped who?  Don't slap privates?  Shush up... got whacked on film.

Maboo is a stupid name

Is this the pantless version?

Who needs a blue screen in their living room?

Let that be a lesson to the rest of you nuts.

My planet has a first name, it's E A R T H.

You can SAY that there has to be some way, but there doesn't HAVE to be. Stop lying.

The power may be on, but that doesn't mean it's working.

You’ve got to tell me about your world. Something I don’t know.

I'm afraid to touch my own skin. Each scratch could bring death.

Fuck free will, I want to feel perfect.

So anyway, small pox came and killed them all.

If I were to play dead, I wouldn't do it in the middle of the road. That's just asking for trouble.

When people ask you where you're from it's hard to figure what to say - from Johnny Poptart

the insane domain - das geisteskranke Gebiet - the spirit-ill area

Come to our chess meeting some time.

We sit locked in this grumpy silence. It's my fault tonight. I am the bitch of the day.
I've said I'm sorry but it hasn't helped. Oh well, I did my obligation by saying I'm sorry. I'm through thinking about it. If he wants to sit here and not speak, that is fine with me. I have nothing to say. It's all been said before.

Sometimes you just have to itch it until it bleeds.
The pain is better then the itch.

I stare into the insane eyes of a dead man.

It's just a few more hours until you wake.

Coffee.
Article.
Pick up cat food.
Roommate interview at 2.

She's not here yet so there's plenty of time to find a good table.

If a cloud was the same as a fool, how would you feel about rain?

Poof, proof, or roof?

Nothing is more obvious than the open gate.

It seems normal when they tell you about it, but then a whole camera crew appears and suddenly it's not so fun anymore.

Matching socks up is boring and sucks up hours of your lifetime. It's easier to just buy twenty pairs of the same socks so they all match.

The fire looks warm but let me tell you, it's not.

Girls who won't shut the hell up are annoying.

Commercials about diapers shouldn't be allowed on the TV.

Why would anyone want a purse that looks like someones ass?

Umbrellas are creepy looking.

You can say that I was watching, but I actually wasn't.
Your telling me that I did won't make me watch either.
So don't even try it.

Why take off with a wick shaw when you didn't even say hello?

Wookies without pants? That can't be right.

Her name was April. Puffy hair-sprayed bangs hung above her eyebrows as she would roll her eyes at the teacher. She thought she was too smart for this class but she was wrong. When she flunked her exams, she flung herself from the roof of the school. She broke both her legs and cracked open her skull. What a stupid bitch.

Bugs like to touch themselves with their antennae while they watch you sleeping.

Horses sometimes dress up like humans and eat subs. They brag about it to their other horse friends when they get home.

There was a pair of pants, rotting away in a bag at the back of the locker. No one knew who owned it. It seemed to be a mystery to all but the one embarrassed boy in the class who had left it there. He didn't want to be called "moldy crotch" or "crotch mold", so he kept quiet. The pants were then thrown in the garbage.

Snow White was actually a controlling bitch who refused to let those dwarfs do what they truly wanted, to run around nude all day long.

If pretzels could just get their act together, they'd take over MustardLand. For those that don't like mustard but do like pretzels, that would suck a lot.

That's not a hat, that's a mess of garbage tied to your head.

Rainbows like to hide when the sun goes down at night.

It may be ok to sit on that chair, but who knows what sort of nasty thing was on it before? For all you know, it could have been a germ monster who has grown from the nasty germs of all the nastiest stuff ever who sat down on that chair before you. You really should just carry around a chair and never sit on anything but YOUR chair.

The moment has come to tell off the chick who keeps bobbing her head up and down as if she knows what we're talking about. She is a filthy liar. She hasn't a clue what is going on and we should throw candy at her until she gets one in the eye and it makes her cry.

Figure skaters should sing as they're skating around.

A brown fridge tipped over on its side makes for a good coffee table.