what is on your desk right now?

*THINGS THAT REALLY ARE THERE: My monitor, a lamp, a water bottle, a pen light, a can of "FART spray" (It's just what you think it is), a clock, numerous pencils void of lead that I don't want to throw away because they could easily be refilled yet I am too lazy to do so, a lava lamp, dirt, a roll of duct tape (classic silver), a small pile of stuff taken from my pockets, including excessive lint, a $5, a key, a gum wrapper, and a crumpled note from a friend concerning our urgent need to remove from the wall and burn a poster of Charles Dickens. *THINGS THAT SHOULD BE THERE BUT AREN'T: A $20, a borrowed watch, numerous homework assignments, a functioning mechanical pencil, and a roll of duct tape (green). *THINGS THAT ARE THERE THAT I DIDN'T PUT THERE, I SWEAR: A piece of plexi-glass, what appears to be saran-wrap, another gum wrapper of a brand I hate, and a coaster. Yes! A coaster! Who uses coasters? It's a real coaster, too, not a random piece of paper! Who could have done such a thing? This is forgery! No! Blasphemy! *THINGS THAT I SEE THAT ARE THERE BUT I SUSPECT THAT I AM THE ONLY ONE WHO CAN SEE THEM CUZ PEOPLE KEEP LOOKING AT ME FUNNY WHEN I REFER TO THEM: My friend George, seven $100's, and those little purple frogs. Oh, they- What? W-No, I will NOT burn down the....hey,is that sugar?-  FartMonkey

CDs, more CDs, used train ticket, dirt, money... boring desk.-  Omuletzu

my nose-goblin collection.-  SiNiSTaR

A whole load of shit. Literally. It smells really bad. But is surprisingly fruity to taste.-  Mzebonga

(((quickly trys to hide objects from the Shrine to DC))) umm..pencils, pens, discs, you know. stuff like that.-  Syko Morgana

Umm... dirty socks, papers, and a half eaten poptart-  NSuxbum

2 day old plate of hardened bbq sauce with fork stuck in it.-  Pancake

a paintball gun, 2 paperclips, and a sex toy. Which order I use those is entirely up to your imagination *big sexy grin*-  Anthrax.Boy

a cable moden. a can of pop. two phones, one cel and one land line. a remote control. and a psck of smokes-  dennis1111

What are you implying? You're not with the FBI are you? There's nothing illegal on my desk! Ya want some?-  Indomitus

Stuff you know pens,envelopes,books...-  Sally

cups, silverware, books, pens, juice, computer, speakers, cds, scissors, an envelope...yep, that's pretty much it-  littlebit

my computer, nuts & bolts, my feet...-  irish psycho

Speakers..monitor..keyboard..printer..papers..scanner..games..webcam..cds(mostly illegal)..bowls..soda cans...a pinata...o0;..and curtains..yep-  SG*

the computer . . . and my tongue-  Fish

my stupid yellow elephant that i never should have wished for-  moo poo chic21

1. The computer with the usual input devices. How the hell would I be typing this out now without it? 2. Siemens Company telephone. 3. Swiss army knife. 4. Coffee mug that says "Beer" on it. 5. Bottle of water. 6. Training manual which is "LiveLink Section 6: Managing Workflow Instances". 7. Stationery such as pens and papers. 8. My hands and arms.-  DZ

the computer, cds, my hands, tissue, the mouse and mouse pad, the keyboard.-  Crisco Cat

notebook, ring, 4 laptops, and a few backpacks...process of illimination ... SCHOOL!!-  spanky

Porno, pencil, eraser, mouse, porno, desk lamp, naked sock monkey, porno...-  Batman (na na na na na na na na)

a midget.-  Chunderspew

a key, a bottle of ketchup, a safety pin, ashes, a vibrator, a pepsi can, a moutain dew bottle, speakers, a shruken head, a napkin, a cd burner, a pin, an envelope, cds, a book on teenage witchcraft an empty newport pack, a lighter,a key, my feet(ewwwwwwwwwwww hate em) a mountain dew can, my phone,and a severed hand and a photo of bozo the clown with darts in his head.(damn clowns)-  monkeeskittles

a bottle of water-  tinkerbell

NOTHING SO STOP ASKING ME YOUR MAKING ME CONFUSED?!!!!!-  jim bibble

a chocolate orange, a bottle of water, an ashtray, cigarettes, a lighter, some cd's, and misc. trash.-  vic

my dentures, calculator, puke-covered brother, a sock, shit and other stuff...-  BigMama

3 sheets of paper that have suicidal writing on them all about people killing themselves. and they do it to make their mommys proud.-  irish psycho

A biography of Captain Kidd, book safe (with a bookmark in it), colored pencils, hammer glove, a couple of computer games, and a bucket full of candy. At least I have a bucket full of candy...-  Riku

gnahahaha, you think i can afford a desk?-  Lithaial

My two lucky specks of dust, oh, shit i've lost em again! oh crappo, no its not that one, .................aha! oh no wait thats dandruff, yes found it, hmmm looks kinda intoxicated, no surprise allways out on the town.-  cRaZy MoNgOoSe

Must i explain? My desk has been filled with shit. If i MUST explain then here's a list. 2 coke cans, a wine glass, random pappers, my resume,salt, salt shaker,videogames,pork rinds,memory card,batterys,"used" tissues,candy, \chick's phone#,hole puncher, pictures, money,wood,blank paper,water bottles,opus,folders,candy-wrappers,remote,about four kinds of chip crumbs,plastic,dust, and recipts. -NNY

Monitor, keyboard, mouse, mousepad, notebook, Neon Genesis Evangelion DVD.-  Rebirth

I have'nt a desk... i'm on my laptop... in my monkey loving parlor-  Momo

a really nice guy-  irish psycho

my computer, a portable cd player, tons of cds, a couple of books, instruction manual for computer, pen and pencil thing, candy, coke cans, movie cases, clothes, pretty much everything except for my bed.-  Angelle

left over 6 year old girl from last week --swats fly-- maybe you'd like some of the rump? its soft, tender, like veal.-  FreshFruit

Looseleaf paper, CD's, scissors, a pair of glasses, the printer, a severed head, a red binder, a book, a metal ruler and my brother's headphones. Do you like how I casually put the severed head in there? Yeah, I know you do.-  McDiablo

color swatches, eyescream by henry rollins, desk lamp (on), tape, vitamins, gameboy advance, sunglasses, hansel cd, faith no more sticker - coffeespaz

pc-  sam

MY computer 2 hands and 1 pound empty pudding cups.-  JENOVA

A cd player blasting Misfits, A jar with dead insects drying, a gold palm frond, a shrunken head, a pair of vases with about 15 dead roses i've collected, pictures of my boyfriend's truck (MEN are worth their material vanity), A gayly painted ceramic bunny whose eyes have been violently removed (he wouldn't stop staring), and my handy dandy bong.-  eva P.

Manson Cds, computer, desk lamp, porn.-  HellKitten

a computer and a marker that smells funny-  JAK

My computer, printer, CDs, 5 emptie pop can's, one almost emptie pop can, a pen, a dog whistle, remote contrl, a paper plate, a letter from a chick in jail that says she wants to marry me, salt and pepper shaker, a scanner, a piece of duct tape on said scanner, an empty milk crate, a reciet from paying rent, an inch of dust, and a vodoo doll of my cousin SaneLane.-  InsaneLane

a rather large pile of work which i should be doing. - communist queen

a spot- barbie